You Bet
by Polly83
Summary: Young Alex overhears a conversation between his parents about Claire. They think she's too smart to date him, but he's gonna make them change their mind... he can bet on it and he will.
1. Chapter 1

**This is the first story I ever wrote directly in English. One day I had this idea and I just had to write it. **

**Prologue**

Alex Ryan was sitting on a couch, at home, reading a comic. He was a little bit distracted, so he decided to go into the kitchen and take a snack. But then he hear voices from his father's study.

"_I thought it was a good idea Liz"_

"_Harry, they are only fifteen, they are too young!"_

"_I know, I was only wondering if we could do something to get them together… Nick marrying Drovers's heiress is a perfect plan. We'll be the wealthier owners in the area!"_

Alex was astonished. He knew Claire McLeod since his family arrived in the district, a few months ago. Claire was the most stubborn girl he ever knew, the only one who always dared challenge him. She was definitely not the kind of girl he would date, she neither dressed up like a girl, but he somehow liked her. He and Claire were closer then she and Nick, they were a kind of friends, even if they always argued. "Nick's been at school for the last 4 months while Claire and I were already working in our farms. Claire and Nick hardly know each other, how the old man can plan something like this?" He thought as he decided to keep listening from the doorway.

"_But we already are"_

"_But no one would neither compare with Killarney and Drovers together. Nick will arrive this evening, so I can invite Jack and his daughter tomorrow for lunch"_

"_No problem for me. But… what about Alex?"_

"_Alex?!? I think he likes Claire"_

"_Yes, he do. I was wondering… why not Alex?"_

"Yup! Why not Alex?" muttered Alex a bit hurt "I'm the oldest, I should be the fist to be settled"

"_Jack's daughter is not the kind of girl Alex would date, and she's too smart to date someone that already dated half Gungellan girls in a few months."_

"_You're right, but…" _

"_He started flirting every girl he met in the very second we arrived here, and I wonder if he ever noticed she actually is a girl. And, as I already said, she could never accept to marry someone like Alex."_

Now Alex was very angry. Why in the world his parents thought Claire could never marry someone like him? He could have at his feet every girl in the district, but not Claire McLeod because she was too smart for him?!?

He was too angry to think, so he thought a snack would be great.

**Chapter**** 1**

The next day Alex was still angry. He felt that every statement his father dropped about Claire or Nick at lunch seemed to be overlooking.

He also observed Claire and Nick's behaviour. He was sure nothing could happen between his little brother and the girl next-door, but his Dad could be such a underhand.

Claire noticed there was something wrong about Alex, but she supposed he had a fight with the girlfriend of the week. She tried to talk to him after lunch, but he answered harshly that he was fine and however it wasn't her business. She felt a bit hurt, she thought they were becoming mates in the last few months, so when she arrived home that afternoon she was still in a bad mood.

"Hey bro', what's wrong with you?" asked Nick shortly after Jack and Claire left.

"Nothing. I'm waiting for Michael, so leave please"

Michael Davies was a close friend of Alex, they saw each other almost everyday, especially when Michael tried to avoid his 7-year-old sister Ruth. Nick didn't like Michael very much, so he agreed to leave his brother alone.

An hour later, while Nick was passing Alex' room, he seemed to hear his name, so he approached. Alex was growling something, than he heard Michael's voice reply.

"Someone here is jealous?" giggled Michael.

"Me jealous? Are you kidding? Jealous of the most boyish girl in the world?"

"So why this 'plan' is getting you so angry? I thought you and Claire were only mates…"

"We are. But I can't stand the fact Dad neither take me into consideration. Like I cannot conquer every girl I want to" replied Alex dryly.

"What are you talking about?" said Nick entering the room.

"Your Dad is planning your marriage with Claire McLeod!" answered Michael.

"Are you joking? It's not funny at all" Michael always pulled his leg, mostly about his marriage-to-be with little annoying Ruth, but this time Alex was not laughing at this gag.

"No, no, I'm not joking at all" continued Michael almost burning into laugh "and there is something more, Alex wants to marry the girl himself!"

"I don't!" screamed Alex blushing a little. "But I have a plan too" continued as he became serious again.

"What are you talking about?" asked almost together Michael and Nick.

"Nick, do you like Claire?"

"Of course I do"

"Do you think you could marry her one day or another?"

"I'm fifteen, of course I don't think I could marry her. We barely know each other"

"That's what I thought."

"You're scaring me Alex" murmured Nick "You look devilishly"

Alex burst into laugh, and so did Michael. Nick thought this was the end of the talk, but Alex continued.

"My own father thinks I can't conquer someone. I'll show him I can"

"Are you completely mad?" said Nick. He was seriously starting to worry about his brother's mental health.

"It's a challenge. I like challenges. I'll date Claire McLeod, I can make it."

"You bet?" asked Michael.

"Yup"

"And what will you do with this girl?"

"What?"

"I mean… are you going to… kiss her or what?"

"Sure. I bet I will… Oh, no no no"

"You give up already?" tease Michael.

"No, better. I bet _she_ will kiss me in public, where anyone could see it"

"I bet my horse you will fail if you bet your horse as well"

"Here I am." Said Alex as he and Michael shook their hands.

Nick was totally astonished.

"But… what about Claire?" he stammered. Alex looked at him unrealizing.

"Are you going to tell me that you don't care about joking with her feelings? I thought she was your mate, I thought you care about her, at least a bit! If you do make this to her I guess you are completely insensitive to anything" and he left the room slamming the door.

Nick was in disgust. Alex was competitive and stubborn, but he always thought his brother was a good person. Fortunately he was only staying for the weekend, so he was not supposed to watch his brother carry out this stupid plan.

He considered the possibility of tell Claire what he heard, but she'd believed Alex, not him. He wasn't as close to Claire as Alex, why should she believe him?

**So…**** what do you say? Liked the beginning so far? Let me know, you know how.**


	2. Chapter 2

**I don't know about you, but personally I had had my best ideas for my stories in the most unthinkable moments. For example I wrote this chapter (at least most of it) on a bus, going to an appointment somewhere... **

**Chapter**** 2**

Nick didn't talk to Alex as long as he stayed at Killarney. Alex couldn't understand why he was so angry with him, mainly because he was not Claire's friend. He was only planning to kiss her, not to kill her!!

Alex have kissed a lot of girls, and no one complained about it. He simply thought that this time it would be the same. He had never kissed a mate before, but Claire was his first female mate.

While Nick was at Killarney there was no way he could stay alone with Claire, in the meantime he wondered what "tactic" he could use to impress her. He'd already tried his usual when they've met at first, but it didn't worked out. Claire was different from any other girl he had ever met. His cocky approach clearly couldn't work with her.

But… what kind of boy Claire liked? He didn't know at all. They've never talked about this.

Where could he start?

After thinking for a long time, he decided to let the moment talk. There was no hurry, the bet was not a short-term one. First of all Claire had to let him in, they had to become closer.

The fist time Alex saw Claire alone after the bet was on Wednesday. He was fixing a fence at the border between Killarney and Drovers. The sunset light painted the land of red. Alex already knew Claire enjoyed sunset rides and he hoped to meet her. He saw her on a hill nearby. She saw him waving and reached the border.

"Alex" She simply said, touching her hat with a hand. "Late work. I guess your father is taking you under pressure"

"Nah, I'm taking it easy. Nothing waits me home tonight."

"Neither your dinner?" She knew one of Alex's main worries was food. Food for him vas never enough.

"Mum and Dad had an important dinner with very important people from some very important place -bla bla bla-, important my ass, but tonight I'm supposed to dine alone in the kitchen and stay out of their business for a while." The way Alex was talking and teasing his parents was very funny, and Claire couldn't help but laugh at him.

"Look Claire, I guarantee that have a meal all alone in my kitchen isn't funny at all!" She tried to stop her laughing.

"I can offer you to share our poor meal at Drovers, my Lord" she tease him with a funny bow. "Meg usually cooks for an army. But only 'cause you look sooo miserable."

"Yeah, yeah, I know. I'm the poor next-door guy whose parents left all alone in the house. You could comfort me McLeod"

"Dream on Ryan" and they both started to laugh.

"Can we go now?"

"I'll come in a minute. I only had to… fix… this" he said handling pincers.

"No worries. If you're okay I can wait for you. You don't know Drovers very well yet, I don't need you to wander across my land."

Dinner was very good and Alex enjoyed the company. Jack and Claire discussed everything and Alex started comparing his family with the McLeods. His mother cared about good manner and proper topics. His father was often scary. No jokes, no noise, no fun at all.

After cleaning the kitchen, Claire found Alex out of the house. He was seated on a step, lost in his thoughts.

"Are you ok?" asked him

"Yeah, yeah. Just thoughts."

"What kind of thoughts?" She sat down besides him. He didn't answer. "You're allowed to tell me it's not my business, but at least say something! It's not kind at all to sit there alone in someone else's home." She at least succeeded in making him smile.

"I was thinking about families. Mine and yours are so different…"

"Jack and I are barely a family. If only Tess was here…"

"Tess?!? Who's Tess?" She shook her head and avoided his glance.

"Never mind. Time to go home?"

Alex didn't want to leave, but he realized the topic was uncomfortable for both of them. He made a mental note to ask her about Tess, sooner or later.

He slowly stood up, entered the kitchen and took his hat. Claire was standing against the wall, watching his movements.

"Yup. I'm going. Thank you for… everything" She nodded and hold her hand. He stared at her for a moment, then shook the hand she held out.

"You're welcome. This is what mates do I guess" He shook his head and turned away.

She stared at him while he was leaving, thinking that maybe to live in a well-off and apparently ideal family like the Ryan one was not so wonderful as it seems.

At Drovers, with Claire and his father, maybe for the first time after his brother's accident, Alex felt welcome and accepted somewhere no matter what. He noticed that this made him feel a bit strange.

He thought about that dinner for a long time, and he completely forgot the bet.

**Will Alex remember the bet? And what will he do about it? Only one way to know...**


	3. Chapter 3

**Will Alex remember the bet? And what will he do about it?**

**Chapter 3**

A month had passed since the bet.  
The day after the dinner at Drovers Alex suggested he could join Claire in her evening rides. She gladly agreed, so they started seeing each other almost everyday.

They enjoyed just to be together and talk about everything. Their talks were definitely not "boyish" or "girly", they talked about their lives, their work, their farms, and they mainly talked about horses. They shared deep love for horses.

They talked about everything except their families. Jack had told Claire that Nick hurt himself in an accident, but nothing more. She knew the topic was still uncomfortable for Alex.  
One day he arrived at the border, where they usually met, with a sad look on his face. He sat on the grass, under a tree and she sat next to him.

"All right?" she asked a little worried. She have never seen him like this.  
"Yeah. I'm just…" he put his head on his hands.   
"Just… what? Alex, what happened?"  
"Dad's a jackass… as always" he sighed.  
"What did he do?"   
"Nothing special. He cried me out because the fence I repaired broke again"

There was something else, Claire knew it from his gloomy glance, but Alex was not in the right mood to talk about it. Usually Alex was playful, even if things went wrong he was always able to lighten the mood. It was one of the things she liked about him. But now she saw him in a very different way. Claire began to understand that only his relatives had the power of keep him down like that.

"It's odd. I mean… you look like the perfect family from outside..." Claire was following her line of thoughts and she didn't even notice she was talking loudly.  
"We are not perfect, that's sure as a hell" he exclaimed with a sigh.   
"But you have a father, a mother and a brother. I've only Dad and I barely remember my Mum."

Listen to Claire could manage to move his attention away from Harry Ryan and his not-so-veiled reproaches. Everytime his father criticized him, Alex felt he accused him of causing Nick's accident. He felt guilty too, that was the reason why he was so shattered after his quarrels with his father, so he kept talking about her family.

"What do you remember about her?"

She closed her eyes before answering. "Her scent. I have a sort of picture in my mind: she's hugging me, we are in her bedroom, she's talking about my little brother-to-be and I can still smell her scent. I don't know if it's a dream, if it's illusion or it's real. It's silly, I know."  
"No, it's not. For you it's real. That's the only important thing."  
"What do you mean?" she asked creasing her eyebrows.  
"You have this picture. Maybe it's a dream, maybe it's real, it doesn't matter. When do you think about your Mum you have something to figure in your head."   
She bended her head and stared at him. She was very touched by his reply even if she couldn't say why. Maybe she was surprised because, for the first time since she knew him, he was definitely right. It was a strange feeling.

Now it was Claire's turn to twist the topic.  
"And you? Have you ever lost someone?" He sighed and thought for a few seconds, then answered.  
"No, not really, but I thought I've lost my little brother."  
"After the accident?"  
"Yeah. We were together. I saw him fell. It looked like a nightmare. He was on the ground, and there was sooo much blood and…"

Alex stopped talking. He was about to tell her it was his fault, but he was scared. He hated himself for what he did to his brother. He didn't want her to hate him too. Fortunately she didn't notice his reaction, or maybe she noticed and let it go.

"When did this happen?"  
"Last year. He's been in hospital for months. Mum and Dad decided to move here after recovering. Where we lived he was 'the boy who has a limp'." 

After a short silence he went on. "Now it's your turn. What about Tess?"  
"Tess?!? Tess who?"  
"Come on, Claire! Don't pretend you don't know what I'm talking about!" 

She thought that maybe she needed to talk to someone about her, to share her loss with a mate, so she finally gave up.

"Tess's my sis'."  
"Do you have a sister?"  
"Yeah, somewhere I do. She left years ago with her Mum. Since then I'm alone with Dad." She thought he will tease her, but he simply asked:  
"Do you still miss her" Actually it was not a question, it was more like a statement.

She nodded and he saw her face half smiling.  
"Why are you grinning?" he asked quizzically.  
"I've never talked about Tess, with anyone. Dad doesn't want to. It's like he could cancel our pain avoiding every hint of their mere existence."

He moved nearer to her. He wanted to comfort her somehow, but he didn't know what to do.  
"Do you feel better?" he asked.  
"Yeah, a bit. It's nice have someone to talk to, no matter what. I think I have to thank you"  
"No, you don't have to. It's nice to me too. But now my stomach is telling me it's dinner time…" he said touching his belly.  
"Hungry?"  
"As always!"  
They burst into laugh and stood up.

They both spent the evening thinking about each other. Now they shared something more than love for horses, they shared their deepest feelings.

Claire didn't loosen up easily and Alex used to hide what he really felt under a light-hearted surface, and he was so good in it that often he wasn't aware himself of his feelings.

When Claire came home for dinner Jack noticed she was in an unusual good mood.  
"Why are you so cheerful? Something happened?"  
"No, why are you asking?"  
"You look like someone who won the lottery or something"

She burst into laugh, then she thought he was right in a certain way. She was really amused at this thought.   
"Yeah, something like that. It's good to have someone to talk to."  
"Do you mean Alex?"  
"Yup" She replied nodding.   
"I'm glad you finally found someone who is in your good books."

Jack haven't seen his daughter so happy in a lot of time and he was happy for her.   
"I'm not so fussy!" she pretended to be annoyed.  
"Yeah, I know, I was joking. But you really are too much introvert honey. Sometimes you have to show people what you want and what you feel or you'll never be happy." Jack truly meant what he said, sometimes he was afraid his daughter could be a lonely girl. For him she was the most amazing girl in the world, but she was also not easy to handle.

"Dad, when you were young did you have a best mate? Someone to talk to about whatever you want…" Claire suddenly brought his thoughts back to earth.  
"Yeah, Hugh. We were always together. Your Grandma always said she'd never seen brothers so different but so linked in the same time." Claire was dumbfounded.   
"Brothers?!? Did you have a brother? You've never said that"   
"Yeah, it's a long, long story. Maybe I'll tell you, honey, but not now. Dinner's ready" He stood up to make sure for him the topic was closed.  
"Dad…"  
"Yeah" He turned inquisitive.  
"For the hundredth time… DON'T CALL ME HONEY!!!"  
"Sorry… honey" He smiled, then put an arm around her shoulders and drive her into the dining room.


	4. Chapter 4

**Alex forgot about the bet, but someone is ready to remind him of it…**

**Chapter**** 4 **

Now Alex spent a great part of his spare time with Claire, he sometimes took her with him at the Gungellan Pub where he met his friends, but except these few times he didn't meet his old mates very frequently. He hadn't even noticed that Michael kind of disappeared for a whole month. Alex knew Michael had some family problems. His Mum sometimes sent him to his Grandparents' home, so it wasn't so odd not to see him around for a while.

An afternoon Alex came home and found Michael in the sitting room, waiting for him. No one else was at home, so they could talk freely.

Alex greeted him and sat down on the couch.

"Are you taking this bet very seriously, right?" Michael was the kind of person who come straight to the point.

"Could you explain?" Alex suddenly was dumbstruck, he didn't have a single clue about what Michael was talking about. After a few seconds he remembered the bet about Claire, but still he couldn't help but keep his mouth open in surprise.

Not hearing any answer Michael went on. "I didn't see you around for ages! It's more difficult than you thought…"

"Nope…" Alex stammered, tossing slightly on the couch. An uncomfortable feeling started to rise in him.

"So why it take you so long? Don't you think it's time to start stage 2?" asked Michael meaningfully

"Yeah…" Alex was still hesitant.

"If I didn't know you I'd think you're scared" stated Michael. Alex slowly looked up at him, and he saw something weird in Alex' eyes, something he couldn't read, but it was not a glare the old 'Alex Ryan' used to have. "Nooo! Are you really scared?" he carried on, eyes wide.

Alex grumbled something, then he changed his mind. "No, forget it! You can't understand. You don't know Claire…"

"Not like YOU do" replied Michael with an allusive look. "So, how far have you got with your… 'programme'?"

In the last 8 weeks Alex had never thought about the bet, not even once in a while. No one was aware of it except Michael, Nick and Alex himself. Nick was always at school and Alex' foolishness obviously wasn't his favourite subject, Michael had spent the last 6 weeks 200 km far away and obviously Alex's memory showed some lacks.

He had to find some kind of answer for Michael's question.

And he had to do it now.

He could tell him that he forgot their bet or that he didn't want to go on anymore, but Michael could charge him being a coward. He was not a coward! But how to explain that?

"Alex… Are ya still here? Earth calling"

Alex was not the best in thinking quickly, so he said the first thing that crossed his mind. His father once had told him that attack is best defence.

"I'll kiss her in two weeks" Alex said in one breath

"That's not our bet, SHE had to kiss you" Michael underlined

"I know!" sighed Alex "I mean, my plan is going on. I told her I'll kiss her at her 16th birthday. Then I have 2 weeks until the term. I can deal with it."

"How can you say you'll kiss her? Have you _planned_ it?" asked Michael inquisitive

"A sort of." Alex grinned thinking about that talk.

_It was about two weeks e__arlier. _

_He was out with Claire for their usual ride. They stopped and sat under "their" tree, they both absorbed in thoughts. _

_Alex was thinking about how Claire was different from his old girlfriends and he suddenly realized he didn't know if Claire had ever had a boyfriend. _

_He and Claire were so close… he should have noticed a boy hanging around her… He didn't know why, but the idea of someone dating or even kissing Claire made him feel slightly uncomfortable. _

"_Claire, have you ever been kissed?" Alex asked. His question was quite surprising, but Claire just glanced at him and nodded no._

"_A 16 year-old lady must have kissed someone, it's a social duty." He added with a stupid grin on his face._

"_I've never heard something like that" she replied laughing._

"_But I did." He was attempting not to laugh._

"_So, what's your suggestion?" asked Claire playfully. _

"_I offer myself to aid you. I'll kiss you on your 16__th__ birthday, if nobody do it first. That's the only present you'll get from me" he concluded looking very seriously at her._

_She decided to play along and put on a business face asking:__ "And why do you think I'd like that kind of present?"_

"_Because you're a girl and I'm a boy." He simply answered in a matter of fact way._

"_That's funny! You actually noticed I'm a girl! I'm pleased you did." replied Claire tilting her head._

"_You don't help dressing up always as a bloke! I wonder how do you looks like in a dress… I can't even imagine Claire McLeod in a fancy dress!" he said creasing his eyebrows, trying to strain his imagination, but it was useless, he actually couldn't even imagine Claire all dressed up! _

"_It isn't worth it" she said calmly, almost in a gloomy tone. _

_Alex noticed she was not having fun there and tried what he usually did for lightening her mood._

"_Ahhh, I bet you're not brave enough to wear a dress at your birthday party!" he teased her._

"_Do you really think I'm not brave enough for something?" she slowly said, pretending to be really hurt. "Ok, I'll do, I'll wear a dress!"_

'Claire remembers? Maybe not. Maybe she will laugh at me if I just try to move closer to her.' Alex couldn't erase from his head the picture of Claire pointing her index finger at him and burst out laughing.

"What are you thinking about? What's the matter with you?" Michael's questions followed one another and Alex wasn't even listening. "By chance do ya wanna give up… Is Alex Ryan a loser?"

"Stop it! I'm just… I'm tired. Can we discuss another time?" Alex suggested standing up from the couch and hoping his friends will follow.

"Ok, as ya like. But you have to hurry up or someone else will slip her through your fingers…" Michael was not giving up. The chance to tease his mate, who was used to have everything he wanted in the very moment he wanted it, was too hard.

"What the hell are you talking about?" Alex asked quite annoyed.

"You didn't noticed? Will, Justin, Albert…" Michael was counting with his fingers, but Alex still didn't get it.

"You sometimes take Claire at the Pub…" continued Michael "and there are also other boys… our friends…"

"Yes, I wanted to show her I actually had friends besides her." replied Alex harshly

"Are you sure about it?" Michael said with a wink. Alex frowned.

"I'm not in the right mood for mind tricks" Alex replied. This boy sometimes could be very irritating.

"Two months ago you said she was the most boyish girl in the world…" eventually spilled Michael

"I said it?" Alex couldn't remember saying something like that, but he didn't ever remembered this all bet thing, so… it was possible…

"Sure you did. But for fifteen or sixteen year-old boys a boyish girl is somehow a girl."

A thought suddenly hit Alex. Was it possible? Did he heard correctly? "Are you telling me Will, Justin and Albert wanna date Claire?!?"

"If they had a chance, yes" confirmed Michael

"Are you joking? Nooooo, it's not possible… she's not 'a girl'… she's…" Now Alex was definitely tossing on the couch.

"They think she's pretty enough for…" Michael started, soon interrupted by Alex

"I know she is, but she is… she's a Claire!!"

"Competition is too hard for ya? Do ya wanna give up?" Sure Michael knew what kind of key he had to push to persuade Alex to do something…

"Are ya starting again? No…" Everytime someone provoked him Alex couldn't help but accepting the challenge. He had a reputation to keep on.

"Then hurry up, it's all I wanna say! You've only another month left. Besides I don't wanna win you horse when he's already dead." And saying this finally Michael stood up and walked towards the door.

"Dream on Michael" exclaimed Alex standing up too

"In a month all will be sort out and you'll can start dating every girl you meet again" He said winking. Now Alex was definitely uncomfortable and he only wanted to be alone. With a strained smile he leaded his friend to the front door, as kindly as he could.

When Michael was finally out of sight, Alex rested on the couch until he heard someone shut the door. He didn't want to talk to anyone at the moment, so went upstairs and locked himself in his room.

An hour later someone knocked at the door.

He heard his mother's voice from outside. "Alex, honey, the table is set"

"Mum, when are ya going to stop to call me _honey_?" answered Alex very annoyed. "I'm not a 3 year-old weeping boy!"

"Sorry, _darling_" And Liz came back to dining room.

Alex sighed deeply. 'Well, just in time' he thought. 'All this thinking made me hungry'


	5. Chapter 5

**Alex needs advice. Who will help him?**

**Chapter**** 5**

After his speech with Michael, Alex decided not to take Claire at the Pub anymore. The reason he was repeating himself was that he didn't want to lose the bet, but there was also another reason, even if he wasn't going to admit it to anyone, he didn't like at all the idea of boys hanging around Claire.

Now Alex felt uncomfortable thinking of the bet when he was with her, so he pretended there was no bet at all. He was not a good liar, so sometimes he simply avoided Claire's glance everytime he could.

For two months he had forgotten it, now instead he couldn't help but think of it constantly. He cursed that stupid, stupid bet. Why hadn't he found a reason for cancel this all!

Now he couldn't lose his face this way.

After a week like that Alex was still annoyed whenever someone approached to talk to him.

Nick was at home this weekend, as every fortnight.

Seeing his brother so upset was very unusual for him. He had tried several times to talk to him, but everytime Alex kicked him off. Nick was tired by his brother's attitude, so he decided not to let him go and entered his room.

"Alex, what's the matter? And don't tell me to leave you alone for the hundredth time!" he asked.

Alex looked up at his brother. Still he hadn't been able to find a way to solve this mess. Maybe Nick could, he was the "thinking mind" of the family.

"I don't know what to do……… with Claire…… and Michael…" he tried to explain

"It's not… Are you talking about the BET?!?" Now Nick was flabbergasted. He knew Claire and Alex were still close friends, so he assumed Alex had simply got his mind back and forget that brainless idea Michael had had.

"Do ya remember?" this question earn Alex a withering glance from his little brother.

"Yeah, of course I do! You are stupid, but that's the most stupid thing you ever did!" Nick was almost yelling at him now.

"And yet I forgot it!" Alex shouted back. "For two months I saw Claire almost everyday and NOT ONCE I remind it. When I saw Michael last week he started telling me there are 4 weeks left and I was dumbstruck. Luckily he didn't noticed. But now I really don't know what to do…" Alex was really worried, and Nick sighed in relief.

"Thank God!" he said to his older brother

"Thank God?!? What do ya mean?" Alex asked.

"I was wondering if you were completely heartless! You do care about hurting Claire, right?" Nick smiled meaningfully, but Alex didn't noticed his smile.

"Of course I do!" he said firmly. This was one of the few thing he knew for sure! "She's the best mate I've ever had! But Michael will tell all my friends I'm a coward if I try to come out. And…"

"And?" Nick asked. Alex had suddenly stopped himself. Surely something was bothering him.

"Nah, forget it." There was no need to mention the kiss's talk. This could only make things worst. "What do ya think I should do?" he asked instead.

"You have three guesses. Number 1: you should tell Claire about the bet…" Nick started counting with his fingers.

"Oh, no, no. Definitely no!" Alex answered shaking his head. "If she knows she will kill me! You can't even imagine how's Claire when she's very, very angry! Go on."

"Number 2: tell Michael you and Claire are mates and you don't wanna kiss her…" Nick saw a quick blink on Alex' eyes at this suggestion, but only for a small second.

"He would think I'm too coward to try. Guess number 3?"

"Go on with this bet" Nick enlarged his arms smirking. He knew (and hoped) that Alex wouldn't have liked this suggestion either.

"So I'd loose my best mate AND Michael will in any case tell the world I'm a loser!" Alex answered.

Nick couldn't help his brother if he didn't know what he wanted most, or who he cared the most.

"Alex… Would you like to win?"

"Of course I'd like. You know I'm competitive and I love winning"

"No, I mean, would you like to win THISbet? Would you like the idea of Claire kissing you?"

Nick noticed a stupid grin appearing on Alex's face and becoming wider and wider every second. Then Alex shook his head and answered, serious again. "This will never happen anyway. She would rather bite my head off than kiss me!"

Nick burst out laughing; Alex creased his eyebrows asking "What's so funny?"

"You!" he answered. "I guess someone here has a deep crush for the girl next-door!" Nick had to add, because Alex clearly couldn't guess what he was thinking.

Alex's face turned red until his ears. "Noooo, I'm not… I don't even see Claire as a girl… She's only… Claire…"

"ONLY?!? Last time I came from school you had a silly grin painted on your face everytime you saw her, and now… look at you! You have a sad puppy face!"

"I'm not a sad puppy!" complained Alex. Nick gave him a 'Yes, you do' look and patted his shoulder in support.

While Alex was still trying to contest his brother's statement, Harry entered the room. Alex almost had an heart attack because he had still his boots on and they were very, very noisy.

"Good evening Dad. Glad ya knocked on the door!" Alex said sarcastically, but Harry didn't react in any way at his son's sarcastic words.

"Nick, could you just leave us alone, please" Harry asked

Nick gave his brother a quizzically glance, which Alex returned shaking his shoulders, and went out. Harry closed the door in front of his younger son and made Alex sign to sit down.

Alex was a bit worried because he had absolutely no idea of what his father would like to talk about. He sat at the edge of his bed and waited.

Harry broke their uncomfortable silence. "You left school 'cause you were supposed to work here…"

Alex nodded. "Yeah Dad, I do work here."

"But you have to learn how to run a property, with all it's involved. An acquaintance of mine can help you learning all you need to know. He has a farm near Saint George. You're leaving next Saturday."

Alex's eyes went wide. he needed a few seconds to let in what was concerned in Harry's words.

"But… you… YOU should teach me…" He was almost stammering.

"No, I shouldn't."

"Why not?" Alex was astonished. Harry's words were still bouncing in his head and his last words made him stood up suddenly.

"Not next Saturday!" Alex shouted "Not at all! I can't miss Claire's birthday!"

Harry didn't seem impressed at all by his son's words. "Yeah, I forgot it. Then you are leaving on Sunday, after Claire's party."

Alex knew he couldn't discuss his father's will. He had only one more matter to worry about. "How long I have to stay there?"

"I don't know." Harry simply answered "It depends on you, on your care and progress. Maybe 3 or 4 months…"

Alex's nose was almost spitting out smoke. He was pretty upset now. "Are ya telling me I'm leaving in _7 days_ for _Queensland_ and I may not return for _months_?!?"

Harry just nodded.

Alex collapsed on the bed. His father didn't even try to justify his decision. He only said it was for his own good and for his future. Then he left his son alone.

**I know, poor Alex… but he'll come back, sooner or later… And there is still Claire's birthday party to come…**


	6. Chapter 6

**The day of Claire's birthday… ****But still the party is not in this chapter yet. What will Alex do about his news? **

**Chapter 6**

Alex entered Nick's room like a storm.  
"Hey Nick, do ya think this shirt suit with black pants?"

"Yeah, I think it's perfect. It's only a birthday party ya know, not the Crown Ball! Are ya planning something?" he said winking. But Alex was not in a joking mood.

"Stop it! I'm sick of 'plans' and 'bets' and everything else like them!!"

"So… what are ya going to do?"

Alex smiled slightly. "I'm just going to enjoy my best mate's birthday party."

"Haven't decided on anything yet, right?" Nick asked.  
"I'll know for sure tonight."

"How did Claire react when ya told her you were leaving?"  
"She doesn't know yet"  
"Eh?!?!? I really don't understand you…"  
"Sometimes neither do I"  
"Great!" 

"It's time to go" Alex said.  
"Already? It's just 7 a.m.!"  
"Yup. My duty is to pick Claire up and keep her away from Drovers until this evening"  
"But it's not a surprise party! So why do you have to do that?"  
"I know it's not a surprise, but that's the only way to keep her from working today"

Nick nodded. His brother was right, there was no way Claire McLeod could just relax otherwise, even if it was her birthday! He still didn't know her very well, but this was already clear to him.

Another thing that was pretty clear was that his brother liked Claire very, very much. He was happy for him, but also worried. Nick didn't know if his brother could handle a grown-up relationship, even if it was only a friendship. 'If not, if he ruins everything, he'll ever be able of forgive himself?' But this was not the moment to talk about it. Alex was so cheerful now… The best thing to do was to be joyful too and joke, at least until his leaving…  
"So… your duty is to entertain her the whole day…" Nick teased him with a smirk, but Alex didn't respond.  
"I have to go. I can't be late. See ya tonight." And he made his way to the stairs.

Claire woke up late. She almost jumped from her bed when she saw the alarm clock, then she realized it was her birthday and she was allowed to wake up late.  
Claire wasn't exactly a 'party girl', but this year was different, she was happy, even if she rationally couldn't say why.

Half an hour later she went downstairs. Before she could enter the kitchen Meg, the housekeeper, was already hugging her.  
"Happy birthday honey!!!" Claire sent her a killing look. "Sorry Claire. But, you know, you're like a daughter to me and I'm so happy for you…"  
"I know Meg" she replied softly, "but it's just my birthday, it comes every year!"  
"I know, but it reminds me you're growing up so fast… You're almost a woman by now…" and she hugged her again.

When Meg released her, Claire sat up at the table, but she stopped eating her breakfast 'cause she saw her father staring at her from the doorway. His eyes were wet.

"Oh, Dad, please, there's no reason to cry, it's just my birthday…" she said again with a pleading voice.  
"I know." He replied, and then he went to where his daughter was sitting and hugged her.  
When he let her go he went at the other side of the table, always staring at her.  
"So… what pressie do you want?"

"You already organized my party, I don't need anything else…" 

"Yes, but I'd like to give you a very special gift, so… what do you want?" He asked again.

Claire thought about it for a while. There was something she would like, but was almost certain there was nothing her father could do. From the first time she'd talked with Alex about Tess she wanted to ask her Dad about her sister.

Once Alex had told her she was lucky 'cause she had a father to talk with, she only had to let him know how she felt.  
"Come on, Claire, I see there's something you wanna ask me…" Maybe this was the right time to tell him…  
"There is something…" she started quietly "but I don't know if you can do anything about it… or if you want to" Jack waited, wondering how he could possibly not want something his beloved daughter wanted. "I'd like to know something about Tess, how is she, where she lives, something like that"

Jack's eyes went wide. He never talked about Tess or Ruth, he didn't know how, he hadn't ever noticed how much Claire missed her sister until this moment.  
"What do ya want to know?"

"Everything. I don't know anything about my own sister! I don't even know if she still has blond hair!"  
"I don't know, but… can we talk later? Alex is going to pick you up…"  
"Alex? Why he's picking me up?" but Claire realized her father was hiding something, he had a guilty face. "Dad, do ya know something about Tess? Anything! If you do, please, tell me! I need to know!!"   
Now Claire was pleading with him.

Meg was still in the kitchen, but left the room to give them some privacy. Jack sighed, and then he sat in front of his daughter.

"I really thought the best thing to do was never talk about her, but maybe this was the best thing for me, not for you… I just wanted you to be happy…"

"I know Dad."

"… Well…I know where Tess is…"  
"What?!? And why have you never told me?" Claire almost screamed,

"Wait, please, I'm going to explain" She tried to calm down a bit and listen.  
"I know where Tess and Ruth are, but I never said nothing to you because it's useless. I tried to send letters and postcards to Tess, but Ruth always sent everything back. She doesn't want to talk to me anymore, and she doesn't even allow me to keep contact with my own daughter. What was I supposed to do? What could I say to you? Please, try to understand…"

"I'm trying… but… Dad, I'm sixteen now, I'm old enough to know. Why have you waited so long?"

"You never asked. I didn't even know you missed her. Maybe you asked when you were ready to know…"

"Maybe. I'm not hungry anymore. I'm going out. What have I to do this morning?"

Jack sighed in relief. The worst was over. Then he smiled.  
"Nothing. As I was saying… Alex is picking you up, you have the day off, so we can get the house ready for the party"

"But I can help you! And Alex can as well!"  
"No way. Day off. It's a command! Go out, he's coming!"

When Claire got to the porch Alex was just dismounting. She was happy to see him. She was still a bit confused about what she just found out, and talking to a mate could help her.

"Hey, old one!"  
"Careful, you're just as old as I am!"  
She was grinning, but he decided to change the subject, he wouldn't upset her in any way today.  
"You were waiting for me?"

"Yup. Dad just kicked me out. I don't have other options." She teased him. "So… where are we going?"  
"You'll see. But… you have to saddle up Jupiter if you wanna find out…" 

Two hours later Alex stopped his horse and Claire stopped her as well. They were on a plain, surrounded by trees, in the National Park. Alex helped Claire dismounting.

"You don't have to do this, I'm perfectly capable of dismount by myself!" she said pretending to be upset, but she was really amused.

"I know, but today I'm your knight, I'll help you doing everything, my lady." Claire burst out laughing.  
"You? A knight?" she was still laughing out loud.  
"Yes. Or we can call it a gentlemen, if you like that better…" Alex smiled slightly as Claire couldn't stop laughing, but he couldn't help but feel a bit hurt. His intent was to amuse her, but now she was laughing at him like he could never in the world do something like that, but she was definitely wrong. He was going to show her he could!

Claire saw the look in Alex's eyes. Maybe she'd been a bit insensitive; after all he had been a great mate for her, certainly not only for fun.

"Sorry Alex, I didn't mean you can't… it's just…"  
"Funny?"   
"Yeah" Now Alex was chuckling as well.

Claire had a very good time. They walked trough the Park, talked, and had a picnic on the grass with the food Alex had taken from Killarney. Alex behaved like a true knight, he fixed the blanket over the grass, he helped her sitting and getting up, he even held her when she was slipping on a rock, and he listened to her when she needed to talk. 

At the beginning Claire took it as a joke, but soon she found she liked this kind of treatment. It was relaxing just to have someone take care of you sometimes…

Before they knew it, the time had come to return home and get ready for the party. When Drovers was still out of sight Alex lead his horse next to hers, took a bandage and covered her eyes.

"Alex! I've seen Drovers every day of my life, even when it's arranged for a party…" He shook his head.  
"Claire, Claire… just… let me do this, ok?"  
She let him.  
He took her home and he untied her bandage only when they reached Claire's room.  
"Here we are. I'll change downstairs, so you can get yourself ready. See you later, my lady"  
He bowed and left the room with a wink.

Claire lay on the bed grinning. This day was just… perfect, and the party hadn't even started yet!

She had found the courage to ask about Tess, now maybe she could do something to contact her somehow, she had a father who adored her, friends who were waiting for her and someone to take care of her, at least for a day. What else she could wish for?

She sighed, then stood up and started to dress up. For once in her life, she wanted to wear a dress, like every other girl. She wanted to look like a girl, and feel pretty.


	7. Chapter 7

**Party time! Enjoy!**

**Chapter 7 **

When Claire went downstairs she was pleased to see that it was only a few friends. Luckily it was not a big boring party. Maybe she was just in a good mood, but everything seemed to be better than usual and she was really enjoying herself.

Alex was still in knight mode and the whole thing was truly amusing. She wished to talk to him alone again 'cause she remembered she hadn't even told him the news about Tess, but there was always someone around her and for once in her life, she didn't want to be rude to her guests.

The party was almost over and the Ryan's were the only ones left. Meg had started to clean up, Jack was chatting with Liz and Nick had fallen asleep on the couch. Harry had gone home already, he had to wake up very early in the morning.

Claire was sitting on the bathtub under the windmill and Alex sat next to her.  
He had been thinking about his day with Claire. He actually had a lot of things to think about, a lot of decisions to make. The only thing he knew for sure was that he didn't want to hurt her.

The simple idea of being away from Claire for so long made his heart stop. But what he could do? He certainly couldn't tell Harry. What would he say? 'Dad, I don't wanna leave Killarney 'cause I'd miss the girl next door too much.' No way.

He only had a few hours left, then. …Then what? …What should happen? …Maybe he could ask Claire to wait for him, but wait for what? …And why? …And then… there was the kiss… had she even remembered? 

His thoughts were brought back to reality when Claire said something, but he didn't understand what.

"Sorry?" he asked.  
"Do you remember when I told you about Tess…"  
"Sure I do"

"This morning I told Dad I wished to know something about her."  
"And what he say?"

"He knows where she is."  
"And why he didn't tell you?" He turned a bit on the edge of the bathtub.

"I asked the same question. He said Ruth sent all his letters back. But now I can do something... I actually have a chance. I you to thank for this."  
"You don't have to thank me. I didn't do anything."

"I have to thank you because I had been like Dad, I've never talked about what scared me or what I felt. You pushed me to do this and I'm glad you did. I'm glad you're here Alex Ryan."

Claire sent him one of her beautiful smiles. He tried to smile back, but her words hit him like a sword through his heart. He was here now, but what about tomorrow… and the day after that?  
He had to tell her. Tonight.  
He had tried writing her a letter, but putting down all that he wanted her to know was too difficult for him.

After another silence he thought the best option was take on the conversation, and then let the blast explode.

"Did you enjoy your party?" He asked.  
Claire nodded definitely and smiled again. "Yup. And you can be quite surprising. You can actually act like a gentleman!" He smiled now too.

Alex thought he had never seen Claire in such a good mood before. She was soooo joyful and full of life… and she looked beautiful in her dress. Yeah, the dress… maybe she did remember after all…

"I've been surprised too," He said smiling at her.

"What do you mean?" She asked a little confused.  
"You respected the deal. You're wearing a dress."

"Yup" She said with a nod. Then Alex noticed a little flash in her eyes, like she knew what deal he was talking about.

For him that was all he needed to do what he had playing in his mind. When he saw her eyes sparkle, the only thing he could think about was kissing her. Not because of the deal or the bet, but just because that was what he felt.

"So… I think it's time to respect the deal myself," Alex said as he leaned forward.

Claire suddenly moved away. Her mind was full of questions. 'Why? Is this only because of the deal or is there something else? Maybe he has pity on me because he thinks I'm not able to find a bloke by myself'.

She was scared of all these things, but most of all by her own feelings. Claire hadn't really taken their deal seriously, until now… now she couldn't help but admit she was at least curious of how his lips would taste. But her fear was still stronger than her curiosity. 

"Alex, you don't have to… we're mates… I'm… you…" She didn't know what to say, how she should react.  
Alex could see the worry in her eyes. It was so easy to read everything she felt in her sparkling blue eyes…  
He smiled and softly took her hand, trying to reassure her "Claire, it's ok. Take it as my birthday present, all right? Just… relax… breathe…"

"But it's late… your Mum…"  
"Shut up" He lifted her chin and for a moment their eyes linked up.  
She felt safe now and she closed her eyes. After all it wouldn't be so bad…

When she felt his lips softly touching hers a shiver ran trough her entire body. No, it wasn't bad, not bad at all. No wonder Alex had lot of girls at his feet…

Alex pulled away and looked at the ground. In that moment he suddenly felt terribly guilty. What the hell he was doing? He had to leave in a few hours!  
"Claire… I'm sorry…"

She creased her eyebrow. Why he was apologizing? …For what? …Because he kissed her?  
"I shouldn't have… you know… " He tried to explain.

"Why? It wasn't so bad…" Her reply was playful. She was trying to lighten the mood and she didn't want him to notice how hurt she felt, but she also began to feel tears of anger coming.

Alex knew he had to tell her everything. He had to tell her right now. She would never forgive him otherwise. Maybe she wasn't going to forgive him anyway.

"I'm leaving," He said in one quick breath.

"I know, it's time to go, but…"

"Not now… I mean…I'm leaving Drovers tonight of course… but tomorrow I'm leaving for Queensland."

Claire thought she must have been dreaming. It wasn't possible, what she had just heard. She waited quietly for his conclusion, maybe an explanation…

"Dad wants me to go there to learn to run a property… I'm so sorry I haven't told you before… I just… I didn't know how… to tell you… can… can you forgive me?" Alex asked as he brought his hand up to her cheek.

Now Claire could see a tear over his cheek too. For just a moment she thought he was going to kiss her again, but he didn't.

He rested his hand on her cheek, then stood up and walked towards home.

After a couple of steps he turned away for a moment and whispered:  
"I'm gonna miss you"

Claire was still on the bathtub, not trusting her legs just yet and wondering why she was so upset.  
Sure she had a lot of reasons to be upset, but there was one in particular. There was something unsolved between them.

Had this kiss meant something to him? Were they still mates or something more? Will he return home? When? What she was supposed to do now? Wait for him? Why didn't he say something more? Why didn't he say anything really?

'I'm gonna go crazy!' she thought shaking her head.


	8. Chapter 8

**This chapter is set eight months after Claire's birthday. Is Alex back? Did he talk with Claire about the kiss and the bet?**

**In this chapter we'll met a new character… at least new for this story…**

**Thanks Jill for beta-reading.**

**Chapter 8**

Claire was reading Narrandow Rodeo advert. Last year she had gone with the Ryan family. Her father was very busy in the time, so Harry offered to take her with them.

She wasn't so sure about it, at that time she was not so close to the new neighbors and she felt a bit uncomfortable in their presence, but Jack had insisted… He was so worried his darling daughter couldn't go because of his chores and so pleased when Harry offered her a lift that she couldn't help but accept.

This year was different, everything was different. Alex wouldn't be there.

For months she had waited for any news from him, but nothing arrived.

No letters, no phone calls, no greeting card, no carrier pigeon, nothing. She was soooo mad at him!

And yet she still felt like there was something missing in her life.

How was this possible? They had only been friends … how long… 3 months? Now he was far away somewhere for more than double that amount of time, why was she still thinking about him? This was annoying!

Maybe she should have gone when his parents went to see him over the Christmas holidays.

When they asked her to join them she was so angry he hadn't bothered to get in touch… 'If he didn't even gave me a call, why should I make a move?' she'd thought. So, she didn't go.

Nick had tried to convince her, several times, nothing changed.

She was still too stubborn to admit she missed him, but she bloody did.

More than she could explain, or cared to admit.

Claire was skimming the list of who was taking part in the Rodeo, lost in her thoughts, when she saw something she didn't expect to see: Alex's name on it.

Was there another Alex Ryan around? It was probably a mistake. Who would put his name was on the list? He wasn't even in the district, how could he compete?

Two hours later, when Claire came back to Drovers, she decided she had to know for sure and Nick was the only one she could ask.

They were friends now, even if they were not as close as she and Alex used to be, she knew she could trust him. So she saddled up Jupiter and left for Killarney.

Nick was fixing a fence not far from the border, alone. Claire was relieved; she wouldn't have to deal with Harry or Liz.

In the last few months every time it was possible they invited her to dinner or lunch at Killarney or somewhere else. It was like they wanted her to be involved in their lives, but she didn't understand why.

They seemed to like her, but she had the feeling that there was something she was missing…

"Nick" she called him.

"Hey Claire! How are ya?"

"Fine, fine"

"Why did you come?"

"I wanted to ask you something… It's about the Rodeo… next Sunday…" she stammered.

"Yeah?"

"Are ya coming like last year?" she continued.

"Yeah, sure. Do you need a lift?"

"No, no, Dad's coming as well, he has some things to sort out then…"

She didn't know how to place the "Alex" subject. She didn't want him to think she was desperate. She was not! She was just curious… Or at least that was what she was telling herself.

"Something's wrong?" Nick asked noticing she was a bit nervous.

"No, no."

"Claire, I know you. When you answer twice to a question you've got something on your mind…"

"I did not!" Claire defended.

"Yes, you did. Twice. You said 'No, no' twice."

"But… Ahh, give it a rest. See ya tomorrow" and she walked towards her horse.

"Claire… Come on…" Nick called to her, he didn't want her to leave mad.

'It's stupid!' thought Claire 'I'm behaving like a silly kid! Better come to the point.' And she turned herself to face Nick.

"Ok. Do ya know if Alex is coming back?" she spat quickly.

"Nah, Dad didn't tell me anything. Do you know something?" Nick returned curious.

"That's weird. I know I read his name…" Claire's mind began to work overtime now trying to figure it out.

"His name? Do you mean he's scheduled to compete?"

"Yeah."

"Ah. So… I suppose he's coming. The last time I talked to him he said nothing."

"He's been away all these months, you're his brother and you know nothing?" Claire asked amazed.

"Claire, I was at school, I'm the last to know anything in my family!"

Claire sighed, shaking her head. They made small talk for another ten minutes, and then she rode off towards Drovers.

The following evening, when the phone rang at Killarney, Nick was alone in the house.

"Killarney. Nick's speaking"

"Hey, Nick! How's home?"

"Alex! Still alive I see… Someone told me you'd be back soon"

"Eh?!? Who?"

"Do you mind? Answer me first" Nick replied.

"Yeah, I'll be back on Friday evening. Big boss told me yesterday" Alex complied.

"So it's true! You'll be her to compete in Narrandow Rodeo! Who put you on the list?" Nick continued his questioning.

"Me… you see, someone invented this great thing… it's called the telephone…" he teased him "But how did you find out?"

"Claire."

Alex's heart couldn't help but start racing just from hearing her name. "She knows?" he finally managed top ask.

"No." Nick said. Alex creased his eyebrow, but Nick couldn't see it. "She asked me cause she saw your name on the list" he finished.

Just then Harry entered, he wanted to tell a 'very important thing' to his older son, so the brothers had to stop their discussion.

Friday came and Harry was late, so Alex had time to take a look around. Finally he was home.

Every day of last 8 months seemed to be the longest of his life.

He missed so much his land, his home, his little brother… and her.

He was savoring habitual homely scents when suddenly someone collided with him.

"Hey!" shouted Alex. In the same moment he heard a feminine voice makes her apologies.

"Oh, sorry mate, I was a bit distracted…"

"I reckon you were!" When he turned he saw in front of him a curled red haired girl. More or less they were the same age. She was really pretty and she seemed to be quite self-confident.

When she noticed the person she was talking to was not a big rude country man she smiled warmly and decided to take the chance, given that he was not making a great job with it.

"Whatever… Hi, I'm Stevie, and you?"

He stretched out his hand answering "Alex. Alex Ryan, nice to meet ya. Are you new here? I've never see ya before, I'm sure I would have noticed…"

She smiled again. This bloke was very cute and maybe she'd made an impact… "Yeah, I just arrived. I'm here for the Rodeo."

"Ya like watching rodeos do ya?" He was a bit amazed. She liked rodeos…

She laughed. "No, not really. I'm competing"

Alex was almost speechless now. In this kind of contest a woman competing was unusual, particularly so young. He couldn't help but ask her age, even if his Mum had warned him never to such a question to any girl or woman, ever. But he felt like she wouldn't mind.

"How old are you?"

"Sixteen. You?"

"Seventeen"

He started again looking for someone, so she made another effort to keep the conversation alive.

"And you, what are you doing here?"

"I'm waiting for my Dad to pick me up. I'm just coming home." He replied with a huge grin on his face.

"From school?"

"Kind of"

"So… you're here on holidays?"

"No, no, I'm not leaving ever again!" he said firmly.

"Where were ya, in a forced work camp?"

"No, the place was ok, but I went there a bit unwillingly, so… this only means I'm more than happy to be back here again."

While he was saying he was happy to be there again Stevie had a feeling he had someone in particular in his mind, so she was going to ask if he had a girlfriend.

Just when she was opening her mouth, he turned away.

"That's Dad! I have to go now. Nice to meeting you again. See ya tomorrow at the Rodeo…" and he jumped in a dark Ute with an inscription on his side:

"Killarney, H. J. & E. M. Ryan".

So he was the son of Killarney's owners… Not bad… She didn't know exactly where Killarney was or how big it was, but she'd heard that name as one of the largest properties in the area.

And he'll be at the Rodeo… She'd noticed he was impressed she was competing, and she was aware of impressing positively in this kind of situation…

And if he had a girlfriend… at the Rodeo there will be loads of cute boys…

She was starting to like this place already…


	9. Chapter 9

**Claire and Alex finally meet, after eight months. What will happen?**

**A big thanks to Jill, as usual.**

**Chapter**** 9**

Today was the big day. Even though he hadn't arrived home until late last night, Alex had to go to the rodeo. He knew she would be there as well.

Alex had dreamt about Claire, she was watching him from outside the fence, happy he was here again and proud of him because he was winning the rodeo.

He wanted this dream to come true or, at least, he wanted to see her. He missed her soooo much.

Jack was talking with some old friends, so Claire left him and went to the bull-riding circle, just in time to hear the speaker call for the first competitor.

Claire was not really aware of what was happening, she was pretty lost in her thoughts. But the girl close to her was very careful, she was clapping or shouting or booing all the time. Claire was almost annoyed and kept an eye on her, hoping she would notice her disappointment.

The other girl noticed, but it didn't put her off, on the contrary, she smiled and put out her hand.

"Hi!" Claire was stunned. Usually she was able to threaten someone with the kind of look she had just given this girl, but this time she'd failed. The girl didn't lose heart and kept talking.

"I'm Stevie. Stevie Hall. Do ya like rodeos? I like rodeos; I like the adrenalin they give me! And you? You're here, so I suppose you like them too…"

Claire looked up at her and couldn't keep sulking. Sure that one had nerve.

"I'm Claire. Nice to meet ya. Are you new here? I've never see you before, I would have noticed…"

Stevie burst out laughing and Claire creased her eyebrow.

"Why are ya laughing out loud? I haven't said anything so funny…"

"I know, sorry…" then she tried to stop her uncontrollable laughing. "The thing is… yesterday I met a guy who used your exact same words! In this area you all use the same talk?"

"Ah ah." Claire said sarcastically, but couldn't help but smile. No doubt it was a weird coincidence.

"So… nice to meet ya Claire. Anyway you didn't reply at my question!"

"What question?"

"Do ya like rodeos? 'Cause earlier you seemed to be a bit distracted…"

Claire shook her head. "Yeah… lost in thoughts I guess. From this moment on my attention will be all over the bull riding circle."

"Great, so we can tease these weaklings together!"

Claire laughed. She really liked this Stevie…

Alex took a look around at the audience. He was amazed to see a somehow familiar load of red hair: there was the girl he met the previous night. She was smiling and waving slightly at him.

But another familiar face hit him more.

Claire was there, standing near the red haired girl, staring at him. He returned her glance and smiled, only for a moment, because it was his turn to enter the circle.

When eventually he fell to the ground he was still grinning. Standing up he searched immediately for Claire's eyes, barely aware of the crowd clapping.

Stevie saw Alex grinning like he was the world champion, and he was looking in her direction.

'Wow, maybe he wanted to impress me!' she thought. But when she turned, she noticed on Claire's face the same broad grin he had, and it was enough to enlighten her to the situation.

The girl he had wanted to impress was not her.

"Do ya know him?" Stevie asked, but Claire was still in her little world. "Claire? Do you know him?" repeated Stevie.

"Who?" Claire finally replied. Stevie tilted a bit her head. This girl was really impossible!

"Who? The guy you were staring at! And don't try to deny it, I'm not stupid!" exclaimed Stevie.

"I was not staring! …… Anyway he's a friend of mine… or so I thought. I don't know." Claire didn't know what to say because she really didn't know if they were still friends…

"Maybe you should go and greet him…" suggested Stevie.

"Maybe…"

Definitely she'd never admit her feelings right now, even if it was so obvious there was something between them! Stevie decided to give it a push and lead Claire towards the exit gate. She wouldn't miss this scene for anything in the whole world!

While they were waiting for Alex to exit Claire heard someone call her name.

"Claire!!"

"Dad" she called back, waving for him.

When he arrived she introduced Stevie and asked him something about his friends. With one eye she looked her father, with the other she stared at the gate, but Alex was still out of sight.

"Alex? He's still in?" Jack asked.

"Yeah, he just finished."

"How did he do?"

"Great! But don't tell him or he'll boast about it for months!"

"Yeah, yeah, I know. I promise. Claire, sorry, we have to go. I need you to come with me now. You'll greet Alex later."

"Oh." Claire answered. Stevie could hear the disappointment in her voice, but she soon followed her father, after a last glance at the gate.

"Goodbye Stevie"

"Bye Claire, see ya around"

Alex was aware that Claire probably was mad at him, but at least he was glad she was there. He was keen to talk to her, but she had disappeared. Was she actually there or was it some sort of dream? Was she so mad that she didn't even want to talk to him? Then why was she there if she didn't want to see him?

He hoped she'd let him explain, sooner or later…

"Hey, Alex!" Stevie saw his disoriented look and decided to join him.

"Hey…" he couldn't remember her name, maybe started with P… no, S…

"Stevie" she finished for him.

"Yeah, Stevie. Sorry…"

"Never mind. I reckon you probably have something else on your mind… or someone else" But she said the last words in a low voice and he didn't hear it. "You're looking for someone?"

Alex didn't know she just met Claire and Stevie wanted to test him (and maybe tease him a bit).

"Emm… yes… I was looking for a friend of mine…" He was clearly tense and was still watching carefully people around him.

"_She_'s not here. She's with her Dad now. She waited for you, but it took you so long…"

Stevie had a weird expression, like she was teasing him, so he didn't know if she was joking or not.

"Eh? What are ya talking about?" he asked while creasing his eyebrows.

"Claire" she answered

Alex' eyes went wide. Maybe she had just met Claire, but how did she know he was looking for her? Had Claire said something to her? Stevie expected this kind of reaction, so she explained to him what she knew.

"Sorry Alex, I can't help you now, you'll have to find her by yourself, it's time for me to join the circle. I'd ask you to watch my performance, but I think you've something else on your mind…" she added meaningfully.

A moment later she was disappeared around the corner.

Alex was still confused. Was he so obviously waiting for her? Maybe he was, but he didn't care anyway. He was conscious of how much he missed Claire, and they needed to talk about what happened at her party. Months had passed since their kiss, but he remembered every single detail like it was yesterday.

He stood there for a while, lost in thoughts, then he started pacing around.

Alex had looked for Claire all morning. At lunchtime he was about to give up and go away from the crowd who was here for the rodeo.

Then he saw her.

She was standing right in front of him, on the other side of the open area he was crossing. His heart started racing.

Gosh, she was beautiful! How come he had never noticed before?

She had already seen him and had a smile on her face. He couldn't help but hurry in her direction and join her as fast as he could.

When Alex reached her, he suddenly pulled her in a strong bear hug. It felt so right just to have her in his arms…


	10. Chapter 10

**Sorry for the delay in posting… Life is quite busy… So far I've written 27 chapters, so I'll be posting them quickly. There are not so many left after these, so hopefully I'll be able to finish the story soon.**

**Chapter 10**

When they broke the hug they stared into each other's eyes, unaware of the world around them.

It was like Alex was in a trance, lost in Claire's glare. He felt like there was some magical power attracting him towards her, a centimetre per minute, not removing his gaze from the girl he had so close.

But then he stopped. He was about to kiss her like he did the last time they saw each other. For him it felt so right, every fibre of his body desired it, but maybe she didn't feel the same way. She was smiling and seemed happy to see him again, but guilt about the way he'd left her overwhelmed him.

Claire had noticed how Alex was looking at her and couldn't help but smile. She was still wondering if this was real, if he was actually in front of her.

Suddenly she saw Alex's gaze becoming very serious. She had had the feeling he was leaning forward to kiss her, but now she had to laugh at her own stupidity. Why on Earth he would have kissed her in these circumstances? Surely he didn't feel that way about her, he had proven that by not getting in touch for eight months!

Alex stood motionless, he wasn't saying or doing anything, so Claire didn't know what to do with him, this was definitely weird. Usually it was so easy to talk to him… But now she really couldn't tell what he was thinking at all…

Finally Alex tried to break the ice, but it didn't work.

"How are ya?" he asked

"Fine" she answered dryly, without asking him the same question.

Minutes later they were still staring at each other.

Claire was starting to be really mad at him, at the thought he actually let their friendship be thrown away. It was his fault if they were so awkward and she was really scared that nothing would ever be the same. The fact that he didn't say anything, not even to offer a late excuse, made all worse.

Just before anger overtook Claire, they heard a familiar voice not far off. Stevie had just reached them.

"Hey! You found each other I see…" The girl was glad to see them together (she felt like it could be some fun watching them hanging around each other…).

"Do ya know him?" asked Claire amazed.

Stevie laughed. "Yeah, it is definitely a small world!! I met him yesterday at the station…" she explained.

Then Alex remembered Stevie was competing, so he found his good manners and asked how her competition had gone.

Stevie smiled proudly. "I came in fifth"

Alex had his mouth wide open, so Claire started her congrats. "Wow! It's great! So young and you're already so damn good!" Claire already knew Stevie was on the Rodeo circuit, she told her while they were watching together, so it wasn't a complete shock for her, but this girl seems to always have surprises.

They chatted about all and nothing for a while, when Alex felt his stomach groan. Looking at his watch he saw it was past his lunchtime.

"Hey girls, how about lunch together? I'm starving and I know there's a nice pub just around the corner…" he suggested. His father was too busy to worry about where he would have lunch and his mother and brother had stayed at home.

Claire and Stevie suddenly agreed and followed him to the pub.

The lunch was fun. Each of them had their own reasons to be happy.

Stevie was so glad she finally found the kind of person that could help her forget her problems.

A couple of years before, she was quite popular. She was pretty and from the outside she seemed strong and self-confident too. She could have fun with boy hobbies like none of the other girls did and she was enjoyable to look at, so every girl envied her and every boy hung around her.

She liked having male friends more than female. She always knew what blokes were thinking and she could handle it, but she couldn't stand girl's chitchatting and gossiping. But Claire was not this kind of girl, not at all. She clearly was direct and loyal.

Alex was the kind of guy every girl her age could fancy, and he knew it. It was weird he would be hanging around someone like Claire, but obviously their relationship was more complex than any ordinary friendship or even a teenage crush.

Alex was just happy, nothing more, nothing less. He was happy to be back from Queensland, he was happy to see Claire again, he was happy he had met the red-haired girl. He knew that he had to talk to Claire, but right now it didn't matter, right now they had company. The time he spent with both Claire and Stevie allowed him to observe Claire peacefully and to think about what he wanted to tell her, about what he wanted overall.

Claire had woken up that morning thinking she was going to see Alex. There were a lot of times she had wondered what this moment would be like, sometimes she had even wondered how she could kill Alex… but when it finally happened… she didn't want to kill him, at all.

When he had hugged her she was happy. She really had missed him after all. But the feeling of betrayal she had was still there. He betrayed their friendship and whatever they could have been.

During the day she had noticed him looking at her in a way that couldn't help but make her melt inside, and this only made her feel more confused.

What did he want?

What did _she_ want?

She couldn't decide if she was more happy or angry with him, so for now she was glad she had someone else to focus on.

Stevie was the only girl she ever met that could be pretty without make up, high heels or stupid things like these. She attracted boys without doing anything just for appearance. She was frank and direct, and this was something she definitely liked about her new mate.

After lunch the three came back to the bull-riding arena, commenting on everything they saw, and in what seemed like the blink of an eye, it was already time for dinner.

Claire and Alex both had to meet their fathers in the same place, while Stevie had a tent waiting for her at the campsite.

Harry Ryan and Jack McLeod arrived at the same time; probably they had met each other on the way.

"Hi girls. Hi Alex, nice to have you here again" Jack greeted them.

"Thanks Jack, I'm glad to be back too"

"Jack and I just found out we both booked a room in the same motel! What a coincidence!" said Harry.

"So tonight we can have dinner together," Jack added. Claire glanced at her father, then Stevie. She knew Stevie was alone and she had no parents and no relatives or friends to dinner with.

Jack understood. "Stevie, you can join us if you're free this evening."

Stevie smiled surprised. "With pleasure Mr McLeod, I'd like that. Thanks for the offer."

"You're welcome and call me Jack, I'm not that old yet…" They both laugh and went to the motel.

An hour after they finished dinner Stevie was already gone to her tent and Jack and Harry snored loudly in their respective rooms. Claire was still wide-awake; she didn't feel like going to bed yet, so she decided to take a walk.

A few feet later she almost bumped into someone. She was ready to scream and hit the person when she heard a familiar voice.

"Claire!" yelled Alex. "What the hell are ya doing out here this late?"

"Alex, it's you…" she sighed

"Yeah, you're lucky. What if I was a robber or something?"

This statement made Claire roll her eyes. "Gosh Alex, I'm not some poor little lady who faints when someone looks at her!! I can watch out for myself! And you, what are you doing out here?" she asked back, just to change the subject.

"Off for a walk. I couldn't sleep… You?"

"The same. Anyway it's none of your business Ryan," she said as she started walking again, but Alex followed behind her. "Still here?"

"Yes Claire." He answered making another step toward her. "What if I join you? Just for a while…" he then suggested.

Claire simply shrugged her shoulders and started walking again, slowly. Alex quickly reached her, joining her pace.

The motel was not far from the city, which put up the rodeo, but the walk was taking them in the opposite direction. After half an hour they were surrounded by fields and the only illumination they got were the city lights. Claire was breathing deeply, savouring the smells of grass and plants, the same scents she smelled at Drovers.

They were alone now, and Alex knew he had to say something, but he didn't know where he should start. During his way back he had thought of a sort of speech he could make, actually more than one, depending on which reaction she might have. Just now, he couldn't remember a single word of these speeches.

When he finally found the courage to talk, Claire's reaction was unexpected.

"Claire, I wanna tell you something… I have to explain…" he started, still insecure about how he was going to handle this situation, about what he was going to say. But soon she interrupted him.

"Stop it Alex. I'm not mad at you, not anymore. I know your father decided and you had no choice but go away. Nothing to explain, you see" Alex could see there was actually something wrong because she was talking faster than usual.

"But I… I kissed you…" he tried again, and again she didn't let him explain anything.

"No need to worry. I know it was a deal for you. We're not married and I've never expected anything else from you, nothing at all. You don't owe me any explanation or excuse, so can we forget the whole thing? Please?" she said, finally looking up at him.

He couldn't read her glare; he didn't know what she was thinking. He could only see she had made a decision and he couldn't change it, at least not in the near future. The last thing he wanted to do was disappoint her even more, so he kept his mouth shut. They simply kept walking for a while, enjoying the silence of the peaceful night.

Alex was a bit sad. He could handle 'angry Claire', but now she didn't seem angry, only very quiet.

Even Alex was smart enough to figure out that Claire could have only one of two reasons for acting like this: either she didn't care about him, or she did care but she was too stubborn to admit that she was disappointed by his not getting in touch with her.

Maybe she thought this was the better way to take away the embarrassment they both felt, or so he hoped. He had to know sooner or later, but for now, he'd just have to wait and see what was going to happen. For now, his only plan was enjoying the time he had with Claire.


	11. Chapter 11

**Long chapter… A big opportunity turns up for Claire. will she take it, even if it means leave Drovers?**

**Chapter 11**

Alex was growing up with a father who was never satisfied with him and a mother who was more interested in the surface of things. On one hand he wished his Dad could be proud of him, at least once in his life, on the other hand he was sick of the heavy atmosphere they breathed at home, so he had wanted to escape for years. Two different schools had kicked him out in the year after Nick's accident.

Even the accident itself was a consequence of this. He and his little brother had gone to a rodeo unbeknownst to their parents, they wanted to be free, if only for a day, but then it all went wrong, and after that things had gotten even worse.

His friendship with Claire McLeod had finally made him feel good with someone. He didn't have to prove anything to her, he didn't have to be up to anything, and, for the first time since Nick's accident, he didn't want to run away. It was a weird feeling.

He had needed eight months of separation to understand this and realized he couldn't lose what they had shared, not now. Unfortunately, he didn't know what Claire thought about him at the moment, so he didn't know what to do either. Eventually he was comforted only with the thought that they had time. He had time to solve the mess he had created from the start.

This thought kept Alex company for a long time that evening, as he tossed and turned under the sheets for what seemed hours to him. He blamed the awful bed, but deep inside he knew this was not the truth. When he finally had fallen asleep, it was very late.

Luckily he day after the rodeo Harry had some work to do, so they weren't supposed to pack and leave until after lunch, so it didn't matter if Alex was oversleeping.

Claire however, woke up early and had decided to wander about the city.

After a while she noticed a wonderful black stallion in a shed, probably one of the temporary shed built for the previous day's auction.

She approached and started to gently talk to him and stroke his neck.

She had seen lots of horses, but this one was special.

Suddenly a voice arrived from behind and almost scared her to death. "Wow! Usually he's not so friendly towards strangers! You must have a thing for horses…"

Claire turned around and saw a middle aged man staring at her from the other side of the shed. It had to be the lucky owner of this wonderful horse. Claire blushed a bit, like a kid caught with her hand in the cookie jar, but the man smiled at her kindly, like an old uncle watching his niece or nephew playing with a new toy.

"He's perfect. Just perfect. What's his name?" she asked still stroking the back of the horse.

"Tornado. He's very temperamental, and so far nobody has been able to wholly tame him," The man answered walking towards Claire and the horse. He was curious to listen to what Claire was whispering to him.

"So you're a bad boy, are you? You're just too full of life to let someone keep your spirit down…"

The horse neighed slightly and shook within his muzzle, it was like he was assenting to Claire's words.

"He's listening!" the man said.

Claire turned around slightly to face the man, never stopping her stroking. "Of course he is, he's smart and proud. He listens, when someone is kind to him…"

The man stood there silently for a while. An idea was forming in his mind, "Have you ever tamed a horse?" He would have liked to have someone so good with horses. He had just started an activity, and someone capable to train horses would be handy…

Claire nodded tightly, answering proudly "Yup! I started 3 years ago."

"How old are you? You seem so young…"

"I'm sixteen, going on seventeen"

"And your parents let you do this?" He had a farm, but for him animals were still a mystery, so sometimes they still scared him, and he could have never let his own daughter do something like that.

"The first time I did it my Dad was with me all the time, now I can work alone, he trusts me" she answered proudly, never stopping to stroke the neck of the horse.

"How about earning some money?" Claire looked at him like he was crazy. "I have a farm and I need horses. I still don't have a trainer, so I thought maybe you could try and help me. I can test you for a while, obviously with your father's permission, then we'll see."

Claire was facing the horse, so the man couldn't see the grin she had on her face. But they say all the time that things are not ever as easy as it seems, so she kept herself grounded.

"By the way I'm George, George Wigham. My land is near Morgan. You don't have to answer me yet, I'd like to talk to your father before, and if you're interested we can meet for lunch or something…"

After a while with a handshake they agreed on lunch in the same pub Alex had taken her and Stevie the evening before and she left the shed.

Wandering a bit more Claire ran into Stevie. With Claire still grinning uncontrollably, the other girl couldn't help but start hassling her, wanting to know why she was grinning like this. After a short time, Stevie learned who Claire had met and what he had offered.

The red-haired girl was so excited for her friend that she almost jumped for joy. Claire was amused by her behaviour, but she also knew her father was not likely to agree to let her go somewhere else alone. He trusted her, but he was still her father, and he was worried that something bad could happen to his little girl, it was his duty after all…

Claire still had to talk to her father about the offer, and Stevie wasn't going to leave her alone until that, so the two girls went to the sheep auction, where Claire knew she could find Jack, but instead of him they found Alex.

"Hey Alex, you know what? Claire has just received a job offer!!!" Stevie shouted happily before Claire could even say a word. Alex glanced at Claire, waiting for an explanation, smiling slightly. Claire shook her head with an 'it was nothing' face.

"Don't act as if nothing happened Claire!! You're only 16 and someone has just asked you to train his horses after only seeing you with one of them!! You impressed him!"

Alex now was even more confused. How could someone make an offer of training horses to a teen without her even proving herself? Maybe there was something wrong, maybe he had bad intentions… His mind was reeling…

"What is she on about?" Alex finally asked.

Claire thought her best option was tell him the whole story; this would prevent Stevie from painting things bigger and better than they actually were. "I was in a horse shed and I noticed the most beautiful horse I've ever seen. When I was… stroking him the owner saw me and a minute later he was offering me a job with the horses he needs trained out near Morgan. Probably it was some kind of joke, it isn't worth so much attention…"

Before Alex could take in what she had just said Jack joined the young people and Claire, with Stevie's 'help', repeated the same story she had just told Alex.

From her father's face Claire knew he was proud of her, but it didn't have any effects on his decision, whatever it would be. Anyway he agreed on having lunch with this Mr Wigham; this was a big step for him and Claire knew that.

For the rest of the morning Claire had really nothing important to do, so she simply took a look around with Stevie. Alex was with them too, but he was oddly quiet. The red girl was doing a good job keeping Claire's mood up, enthusiastically congratulating her for her skill, asking for confirmation to what she was saying from Alex every now and then, at which he responded only nodding and smiling.

When Stevie left them to make a phone call Claire observed he had barely said a word in the whole morning.

"Alex, what are ya thinking about? You seem to be lost in thoughts…is something bothering you?" she asked a bit concerned.

"Yes, you leaving!" he thought. Claire's eyes suddenly widened in shock. Watching her reaction he realized that he had really said that out loud.

"What?!?" she asked in disbelief. Alex was as shocked as she was. He couldn't believe he had actually said that. And she was clearly not pleased with him.

"Alex Ryan, what are you saying? That I can't leave… when you just spent the last eight months far away without a word?" Not only she was not pleased at all, but also she was pretty pissed off.

"That is not what I meant Claire…" He tried to defend himself, but he knew that nothing he could say would calm Claire down right now, she was only getting angrier and angrier. "This man barely saw you and he thinks you are good enough to train his horses! There might be something behind…"

"I could think you're jealous Ryan" she interrupted.

"Claire, why you have to always take things in the wrong way?" he sighed.

"Maybe because you say things in the wrong way…" Her voice was getting even colder, she sounded almost cruel now.

Once again Stevie saved them from saying or doing anything they would have regretted. She had returned shattered, so Claire asked her what the problem was. Alex was not calm enough to be helpful, so he left them alone.

Claire looked up, observing Alex' body becoming smaller in the distance, and felt a strange pain in her heart, something she couldn't name, then she shook her head and turned her attention to Stevie.

"What's bothering you? Something happened at home?"

"No… It's just…"

"Just what? You know you can talk to me. We only met yesterday but you can trust me…"

"It's just… there's no home for me…" Stevie started.

"What do you mean?"

"I'm staying at my sister's place right now, I had problems with my parents… I know she loves me and I love her and I love little Rosie and I like her husband too but… but sometimes… I just feel I'm out of place… But I haven't really any other place to go now…"

Claire didn't know what to say… She could understand it was hard to live with newlyweds with a little baby, she could feel like she was a fifth wheel, but she couldn't offer her a solution then and there. She simply sat beside her for a while, punching her shoulder every now and then, and waiting for her to calm down. And it was working. Stevie was not really shattered, she was just a bit down, but she knew this was not the biggest problem she could have (and had).

"You know what, I can ask Dad if you can stay at Drovers with us for a while… sort of holiday I mean… He's always got jobs to do and I'm sure he won't mind to have you with us…"

"Thanks Claire, but I can't… I have to earn something…I can't be maintained my whole life by my older sister… must find a job…"

"If you don't mind you can work at Drovers… Dad said he needed another hand just yesterday…"

Stevie looked up at her new friend. She guessed it was an excuse, and she was grateful for this, but she couldn't accept. She couldn't stand to be a burden for anyone; she was way too stubborn for that.

Claire read her thoughts. It was easy. She probably could have thought and felt the same in her situation.

"Stevie, I know you think I'm inventing it, but it's true, you can ask Dad right now, before I talk to him. Come on, you'll see. You can stay as long as you want it and then leave when you're ready. You'll be paid and you'll learn something… Not to mention you'll always have a mate beside you…"

"Yeah, bossing me around…" Stevie said, finally smiling again.

"I see you hit the point…" Claire joked back. They both laughed and then they noticed it was almost lunchtime, so the two girls went to the pub were Claire had to meet her Dad and the other man.

The meeting went well, but when Jack asked to talk to Claire alone she knew for sure his answer was no, and she was right.

She was a bit sorry, but it was not a big deal. She loved Drovers Run and her Dad, so she didn't mind if she was stuck with them for now.

Jack felt sorry for Claire, so he asked her if there was something else she wanted. He wasn't really one to spoil his daughter, but she was almost a woman now, and he knew that, sooner or later, she should need something other than just him, but he was trying his best to postpone this moment.

Claire was about to say there was nothing she needed when she remembered Stevie. She was quite sure Jack couldn't say no to her suggestion before, but he sure as a hell he wouldn't say no now, and he didn't.

While Claire was running in search of Stevie she almost bumped into Alex for the second time in two days. Only a moment before she had been happy, but seeing him now, she felt again that pain in her stomach and got angry. She didn't know if she was angry with him or with herself for getting angry without a real reason, but she was definitely angry.

"Dad said no, so there's nothing for you to roar about Alex!" she exclaimed before he could even say a word.

"I'm not roaring!"

"But you did! You attacked me! Mates are supposed to support you, not to judge you!" she yelled at him, still pretty mad.

Alex sighed. "I was not judging you… really Claire… I was just a bit worried I guess…" The truth was he had panicked hearing the word 'Morgan'… He didn't even know where this place was… So it couldn't be close… He only wanted to keep her from leaving… He needed time to have things like they were before… But now he knew he had been selfish and felt guilty.

Alex' eyes were pleading with her to forgive him, and truthfully, it was just impossible for Claire to be mad at him anymore. She simply rolled her eyes. "I already have Dad. I don't need anyone else breathing down my neck."

"Ok, right. I'll do my best about it from this moment forward, I promise" Alex said with a smirk, lifting his left hand on his chest. "I'm also sorry about the job." he said serious again. "I can talk to Jack if you want, maybe I can convince him… I can be very persuasive when I want to…"

He knew that right now the most important thing was that Claire trust him, he couldn't stand it if she didn't.

Claire smiled, tilting her head. She couldn't even guess how hard was for him to make this offer, but she knew he was really trying his best to play the perfect supporting friend, and appreciated it.

"No need for that."

"But… Claire…"

"I'm not so desperate Alex. I knew Dad would not let me go, and I don't know if I wanted to go away either."

Alex glared at her with a questioning look. "I mean that I'm young, there are still so many things I can learn at Drovers… And I don't know if I'm ready to leave Dad alone just yet. He's still the only family I know…"

A sparkle crossed Alex' eyes remembering the talk he had once had with her about her sister. But now was not the right moment to pop out questions about Tess, so he shrugged his shoulders.

He was also a bit sad because secretly he had hoped that he would have been one of the reasons for her not minding the staying. He knew he couldn't expect her to say something like that with the way things were at the moment between them, but hope never dies, right?

"Anyway thanks for the offer…" She leaned forward and kissed him on the cheek, then she walked away.

Alex stayed where he was, grinning. He was not grinning because she'd just kissed him (even if he didn't mind that at all), more because she had just thanked him with a warm smile on her face.

Suddenly he had seen again the Claire he knew, the same Claire who could express her feelings with no words, who only needed her beautiful blue eyes. The same Claire he had missed so much.


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter 12**

Stevie's sister Michelle agreed that her sibling could spend a bit of time with her new mate. She loved her little sister, but it was good to have some privacy every now and then, and learning a job could only be useful for her. Anyway six weeks later it was Christmas, and Stevie was supposed to be at home again for then, so letting her give this a try couldn't be all that bad.

A couple of days after they had left the Rodeo all was settled and Stevie was due for the following Friday.

Claire was very excited about her friend coming to Drovers. After she left school to work with her father she was always with men, except for Meg, but she was a sort of mother for her. She knew she could count on her for everything she needed, but she was not a mate, they couldn't talk about pointless topics just because it was fun. She needed a friend to talk to and to have fun with.

She knew she had Alex, or she used to have Alex, but now things with him were weird. He was there again, but she wasn't sure she could trust him again like she did… Trust was a strange thing…

It was easy to trust him earlier, but now she didn't know what he thought, what he felt, why he did what he had done, so how could she act like nothing had happened? Then again, she was the one preventing him from explaining, even if he wanted to, so it wasn't even all his fault.

Right now she only wanted to stop her brain from running in circles and enjoy herself; and Stevie was the best thing for it. She barely knew her, but it was clear from the start that she was what Claire needed. She had never felt so at ease with someone from the very beginning, even with Alex.

The week after the Rodeo was a busy one, but Alex had spent all his spare time with Claire. He wanted to solve things, to have her back. She was still a little colder than she used to be, but everyday things were better.

The only fact that still bothered him was that she always talked about Stevie when they were close to a serious discussion. He kept repeating to himself it was only his imagination, but he had the feeling she avoided serious topics by talking about her. Sure she was excited about her friend coming, but he could tell there was something else.

Nick had still physio to do after his accident, more than a year before, and some of these exercises could be done in a swimming pool. Appropriately, Harry had one put in the Killarney back garden, so his younger son wouldn't have to go to Fisher everytime.

An afternoon Nick was just enjoying the pool after his exercises and his thoughts drifted off to Claire and his brother. Nick had been curious about what had happened on Claire's party, but he couldn't ask his brother on the phone and he didn't dare to ask Claire. She'd probably bite his head off.

All of a sudden Nick saw Alex dive in the swimming pool after coming back from work. Nick knew his brother had to fix a fence near Drovers and he was obviously in a pretty good mood, so the younger brother assumed he had seen Claire. He had learned to relate his brother's behaviour to Claire's presence and, most of the time, he was right.

After a couple of lengths Alex simply stood there, leaning on the edge of the swimming pool, relaxing. He was not far from Nick, and then the younger brother finally managed to question Alex about Claire.

"Alex, can I ask you something?" Alex came closer with a stroke, so they could talk without shouting.

"Shoot"

"What happened between you and Claire?"

Alex pulled slightly away, feeling suddenly uncomfortable. Now he wasn't watching his brother in the eyes, not anymore. "What do you mean?"

"I mean what happened to the bet, what happened at Claire's party, what did she do when you told her you were leaving, what happened when you were away…"

"That's a lot of questions Nick…" Alex huffed a bit, but at least he answered. "Anyway… the bet was over months ago, at Claire's party I simply told her I was leaving…"

Nick was waiting for something more, there should have been something to tell about the last eight months! "And then…"

"And then nothing"

"NOTHING?? You two are mates, so I guess you've at least talked to her in these months…"

"Nope" Alex was shaking his head, like this was the most normal thing to do.

"Alex! You never asked about her, so I guessed you two were in touch…" The older brother shook his head again, but then again Nick's question made him wonder about what Claire had done in that time.

Alex lifted his head up and was staring at Nick, like he was trying to figure out if he was going to tell him the truth. "Did she ask anything about me?"

Now at least Nick was sure he had all of Alex' attention.

"Come on, Al! What do you think? She wouldn't ask? _You_ were supposed to do something, _you_ went away!"

Blabbling

"Not by choice…" Alex defended.

Nick opened his mouth to say something, but Alex prevented him from saying anything. "Anyway I… couldn't. End of story."

Nick knew that for now he wasn't going to have an answer. Alex swam to the other side of the pool and then came back. "Are you sure she never asked about me?" He enquired again.

"Sometimes I really can't even guess how your mind works… If you were her, would you have asked?"

Alex sighed, thinking at an answer. "No" he finally said with a sad look on his face.

"This doesn't mean she didn't want to…" Nick had thought at something that could make him feel better, he couldn't stand to see his brother like this! He still couldn't believe at how his brother had changed in the last months. Not only because of Claire, but just the fact he had been alone, without his family, had made him grow up a lot.

Only a few months ago he wouldn't think he could talk seriously with him about someone, especially a girl.

"So… how are things going at the moment with her?" he asked.

"I don't know. We are mates again I guess"

"She didn't even ask you why you didn't call her?"

Alex shook his head. "Do ya think it's a bad thing?" Nick shrugged his shoulders and lifted up his hands in surrender.

"I don't know, really. You two are too illogical for me…"

This comment made Alex burst out laughing, and Nick soon followed him.

Despite everything that had happened and Alex' never-ending sense of guilt they had just managed to talk openly, in a brotherly way, and just by that they felt better. This was not something very usual, with Nick always at school or doing homework or physio and Alex always out working.

Nick now was definitely an inside boy, while Alex was always outside, working or riding or playing pool or whatever. They loved each other, but they simply hadn't often had a suitable chance to talk like this.

"I don't know what to do…" Alex sighed after a while. He was doing his best, but what if he had ruined their friendship completely?

"Why don't you try to talk to her?" Nick thought it was the most simple and safe thing to do, and couldn't even imagine a reasonable reason that could prevent Alex from it.

"I don't know what I should say… I just wanna have my best mate back…"

With these words Alex got out of the water and walked towards the main house.

Nick was sure his suggestion should have been a hole in the water, but he was wrong. This time Alex thought deeply about his brother's words. Maybe he was right, maybe the situation could only get better…

Alex finally decided to do what he was told. The fist time he saw Claire in the nearness of Killarney he waved her to wait for him. When they were close enough they dismounted and sat on the grass. After a deep sigh, he started, even if he still didn't know what he could say very well…

"Claire… We need to talk… I know I was wrong…"

"What do you mean?" At this Alex groaned a bit. If she kept interrupting him there was no way he could say anything even close to logical.

"Something is different now, and I assume it's my fault" Then he added in a whisper, not quite audible "It seems like it always is…"

"But I told you it's ok…" she objected

"I know what you said, but you know as well as I do that it's not the same. It's ok, I can understand. I only wanted you to know that I missed you and sometimes I still do"

"But you saw me yesterday…"

"You know what I mean Claire…"

And she did know. She was too stubborn to admit she had missed him too, but hearing Alex' words she had felt a ton of rocks melt inside her. She wasn't so silly after all, thinking that he could miss her like she missed him… he did miss her after all…

"Claire… I'd like to ride with you again and talk about everything like we used to…"

"Yeah… me too…" she was almost whispering… words were out of her mouth before she could notice… but it was definitely true… she missed her rides with Alex… even if they didn't say anything it was good to share what she loved the most with him.

"So… see ya tomorrow then, same place, same hour?" he said smiling playfully.

"Yeah, it's ok I guess…"

She smiled shyly at him as Alex' smile grew bigger. That was it, he had what he wanted and now he could be fulfilled.


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter 13**

Finally the day of Stevie's arrival came. Jack still wouldn't let Claire drive in the dark alone, so the only way she could go into town without her father was to ask Alex for a lift. She usually didn't ask him, she often had so many chores to do at Drovers that past dinner she was exhausted, but this was the first night Stevie was spending there, and she hoped the red haired girl would like the place she had to live in…

The original plan was pick Stevie up, take her to Drovers, let her settle a bit and then leave for the pub to have some fun, but Stevie's bus was very late due to a car accident on the road, so according to the new plan, Alex picked up Claire at Drovers, before dinner, then they would wait for Stevie at the bus station.

They arrived pretty early, so they seated themselves on a bench, waiting and talking.

"Thanks for coming with me Alex" she said smiling and stroking his shoulder.

"Anytime Claire…" he smiled back, just happy to see her smile, but then she turned towards the road, staring into distance.

"By the way… ehm… I'm sorry, but I don't think I'll be able to see ya tomorrow… I'll probably be busy showing Stevie around the place and what she'll have to do or stuff…" she was becoming nervous all of a sudden, even though she had planned what she was going to say. It was one thing to wonder about his reaction, but quite another to observe it.

"Oh" Was Alex' first comment. He was a bit disappointed, but it was only one day after all… he could handle it…

"And then I should keep her company… at least for her first days here…"

Alex' previous smile was already faded away, replaced by a disbelieving and frowning face. "Are you saying that I can't even talk with you without having Stevie breathing down our necks?!?"

"What's wrong with Stevie?" She asked, already on the defensive.

"Nothing. Its only…" he couldn't say he again had the feeling she was avoiding him… it seemed so stupid… "Never mind. But maybe we can take a ride the three of us together sometime…" It was still better than nothing… He didn't mind having Stevie around after all…

Alex almost saw a sort of sparkle in Claire's eyes, and for a moment he thought it was weird, but then he noticed a bus approaching. Stevie was coming.

After their cheerful greetings Alex put Stevie's stuff on the back of Killarney's ute and they entered the pub for dinner and then a bit of fun.

They chose a table in a corner of the room, so they could laugh without anybody complaining.

They spent all evening eating and talking about horses or other people's silliness. It was always fun when Stevie was there, as it had been at the Rodeo.

Later that evening Alex offered himself to bring drinks for the girls and walked to the bar. Stevie was sitting with her back to the wall, so she could see the door of the room. She noticed a group of guys entering and sitting near the pool table.

She not-so-gently pushed her arm on Claire's side. "Hey Claire!"

Claire was lost in her thoughts, but Stevie's punch woke her up. "Hey! What are you doing?" she shouted.

"Do ya know those guys?" asked Stevie excited.

"Who?" asked back Claire looking around.

"That blonde guy wearing black pants and the tall guy with the grey shirt and…" Stevie listed, but Claire interrupted her.

"Ah, yes, I see them. If I remember correctly they are Alex' friends…"

While Claire was still talking one of the guys left the group and went to greet Alex, who was still waiting at the bar and hadn't seen them yet.

"Claire, do ya think we can join them?" asked Stevie animated.

Claire looked at her like she was mad or something. "Why should we?!?"

"Because they are Alex' mates and so are we… and they are nice blokes…" Stevie said with a meaningful smile.

"Here we are… You wanted to be Alex' friend to meet nice blokes…" laughed Claire.

"At the beginning Alex was an option himself, but I noticed he's focused on someone else…" Stevie's intent was to test Claire's reaction, but she couldn't because in the meantime Alex came back at the table with their drinks and he had one of these 'nice blokes' beside him. Claire didn't even shoot a look at Stevie; maybe she was too focused on Alex and his friend coming to hear her friend's comment…

"Justin, you remember Claire, right?" said Alex gulping a handful of peanuts from a cup over the table.

"Hi Claire, nice to see ya again…" the bloke greeted Claire with a worm smile while Alex seated again next to her.

"And I'm Stevie. Nice to meet you, Justin!" Stevie joined in, stretching out her hand. She had felt a bit put aside cause nobody had introduced her yet.

When his drink was finished Alex went to greet his other friends, reluctantly followed by Justin. Alex had asked the girls to come with him, but Stevie had quickly answered they would be there in a second.

"So… what do ya think?" she asked Claire as soon as the boys couldn't hear their voices.

"About what?"

Stevie's eyes widened. "Oh my God Claire, it's always so hard to get anything out of your mouth? What do you think of that guy!"?

"I don't know… He was… kind…"

Claire had answered as if she was talking about a waiter who happened to pour them drinks and this made Stevie roll her eyes full force. "Ok, come on Claire, let's join them and do me a favour, at least try to enjoy other guys' company!" and she dragged her toward the pool table, where the boys still were.

The evening was over and Alex was taking Claire and Stevie home. Stevie was in the passenger seat and Claire was sitting behind. She had been very quiet for the first half of the way, while Stevie was extorting information about one guy or another from Alex. They discussed every boy Stevie had met that evening, and finally the topic got at the boy that had greeted Alex first.

"That bloke was definitely staring at you Claire!" Stevie almost yelled. She was excited because she had had a lot of attention from one of the guys herself, but during the whole evening she had also kept an eye on Claire and Alex.

"Who?" asked Claire like she had just fallen from a cloud.

"Again?!? Claire, are ya blind? Justin!!! He was smiling at you all the time!!!" Stevie was turned towards the back of the car, so she didn't notice the strange look Alex put on.

"Nah, you just happen to have a huge imagination Stevie"

"Come on Claire! You might not be interested, but you can't tell me he didn't fancy you! He was almost drooling over you!!"

"Yeah, yeah, dream on McLeod!" Alex said, and then he bit his lip. He shouldn't have said that, he hadn't meant it… He had seen her huff a bit and shake her shoulders at Stevie's remark and the words were suddenly out of his mouth.

Why the hell he couldn't think before talking? Now she could think he catalogued her as non fanciable, and this was not good, especially given that she probably still hadn't forgiven him completely…

He had watched Claire almost for the whole evening, not that she had noticed, she never did, but now, after Stevie's comment, he should reckon that she was right, Justin did stare at Claire. She clearly didn't care and that thought made him smile a bit, but he was still uncomfortable.

He was confused, he was not feeling very well, maybe it was something he had eaten, but he was sure he didn't think what he had just said was true.

For a split second he hoped she didn't hear him and thought this was hurting him more than her, but then he looked in the rear-view mirror and saw Claire staring into space when it was too dark outside to enjoy the view. In that moment he knew she was hurt and he felt even worse.

As Alex' words had gotten to her Claire and had felt like a punch in her stomach. She kept repeating herself that he was a mate, he meant that phrase like a joke, and besides she already knew he had no feelings for her, at least apart from friendship. She was trying her best not to seem hurt, at least while they were in the car, but as the car stopped she immediately thanked Alex as fast as she could and almost ran inside.

Stevie was about to do the same as soon as she had taken her bags, but Alex grabbed her arm. "Stevie… wait, please…"

And she waited. She could have kicked Alex' butt after his statement, she hadn't noticed how hurt Claire was until she had seen her run out of the car. Now she was even more angry with him, but she didn't know if he had noticed Claire's behaviour, so there was not much she could do about that.

"I didn't mean to hurt her, really. I wasn't thinking… Please, tell her I didn't mean what I said" He seemed honestly disappointed, but this wasn't enough for making up.

"Why don't you come and tell her yourself?" she asked huffing.

"Because she wouldn't let me. Everytime I try to say I'm sorry for something she says I don't have to apologize, so I still feel guilty and she's still upset."

Stevie had to reckon this was a behaviour Claire could have.

"I can't make any promises… but I'll try" she said after a while. "But you've got your part of apologies to make… try to talk to her by yourself, I'm not at your service" Stevie's answer was less harsh than she meant because staring at Alex she couldn't help but think he was sincerely sorry.

"Oh, I'll try, I promise! Thank you mate!" He was a bit relieved. Maybe if Stevie trusted him Claire could do it as well after a while… maybe it wasn't so much of a mess after all…


	14. Chapter 14

**Chapter 14**

For the rest of the week Alex noticed Claire was still cold towards him. He knew he deserved it, but he wanted with all his heart to explain why he said what he had said. But first he had to understand the reason himself.

Before his travel to Queensland, Alex had had the feeling he was special for Claire, a mate somehow irreplaceable, but now there was Stevie… suddenly he was not so special, and someone could actually laugh and joke with Claire apart from him. He liked Stevie a lot, but he missed his rides with Claire… again… and sometimes he felt pushed aside.

His comment had had nothing to do with Stevie, but she was one of the reasons he had acted this way. She was a sort of barrier Claire had put between them. He had felt that way before her arrival, and now it was pretty clear to him. The two girls were always together, and he was going nuts! He should talk to Claire, and alone, but how could he do it at the moment?

Why were things always so difficult now? They had become friends so easily; he could talk with her for hours, but now everytime he dared to say anything she ended up hurt or angry!

At the beginning Claire was really just excited to have Stevie at Drovers, nothing else, but then she began to notice it was simpler just to avoid the topic of Alex. After his comment she couldn't help but be quite distant with him. Everytime she saw him she heard again his voice in her head 'Yeah, yeah, dream on McLeod!' laughing out loud. Alex really wasn't laughing at all in the car, but in Claire's nightmare world he did.

Alex by the way still didn't know what he should do… Apparently Stevie hadn't succeeded in her attempt to make Claire understand how sorry he was and he couldn't even complain because apparently Claire was like her usual self to everyone else. Only he and Stevie could see the little change from the old Claire.

She smiled, she talked to him about the daily things, she told him the chores she did on Drovers and joked about Stevie being there too and always questioning the other workers… Actually Alex always knew every little thing was happening at Drovers, everything except how Claire felt or what she thought. He was still surprised by how she could be so friendly but so distant at the same time.

Almost every second evening the girls spent some time at the Gungellan pub, and Alex was often with them, but after the usual lift he left them alone joining his old friends. He was tired of feeling himself being pushed away, but still it wasn't easy for him to have fun without her. He couldn't help but feel regret, and he didn't even know what for exactly. He regretted everything… he had left; he hadn't said a word to Claire for eight months, even the fact that he had kissed her… If he hadn't done that, he wouldn't be so confused about what he was going to do with her… maybe it would have been simpler…

Three weeks had passed since Stevie's first appearance at Drovers, and nothing had changed. The red haired girl was still sure that the way Alex looked at Claire was definitely not just a friendly gaze, but she wasn't so sure of Claire's feelings.

By what she had observed she knew that these two were perfectly capable of hanging around each other without even hinting at their true feelings, maybe for their entire life, who knows… and she had just watched them… so far, nothing! And she couldn't allow that!

Now she knew for sure that the first positive impression Claire had given her was completely right, she was the best friend someone could wish for, even if it might take a while for her to actually show it. She just wanted Claire to be happy… she deserved it… Besides, as almost every girl temporarily without a love interest of her own in sight, Stevie's main interest now was finding a boyfriend for her friend…

Unfortunately for Claire, Stevie was direct enough to question her straight out. Besides, any other possible way wasn't working… She had already made attempts to get Claire into the subject but, as Alex had already predicted, the only thing Claire said about that evening was that there was nothing going on and she was still the same toward Alex.

The last evening Stevie was spending at Drovers before Christmas holidays the two girls were having a sort of pyjama party in Claire's room, so this was the perfect time for introducing the topic… They were alone and Claire had no excuses and no chances to avoid her… and she was leaving, so Claire couldn't disappoint her right now… or so she hoped…

"Claire, what's up between you and Alex?" At Stevie's question Claire put up an innocent look

"Eh?!? Me and Alex? We're mates, you know. Actually you know everything about our life now, you're always with us!" replied Claire, trying to turn the question into a joke. Actually she did know very well what Stevie was talking about…

"I know what are you _doing_, I wanna know how you _feel_ about him! It's a different question…" Stevie now was sitting beside Claire and was looking at her in a very understanding way, so much that Claire almost felt like she was betraying her not giving a direct reply.

"Why do ya think I could feel something different from just friendship?" Claire asked carefully.

Stevie was searching for an answer in her mate's eyes, but they were hard to read just then. "You're avoiding him! Since he made that comment, after we met his friends…"

"I'm not avoiding him! I see him as frequently as I used to…" It seemed like denial was Claire's best friend lately…

"Yeah, but I'm always with you! And I know that if I'm not there you always call Nick to come with you or everyone else you can think of." Stevie explained, rolling her eyes. At the beginning she had thought it was funny to watch them going in circles, but now it wasn't funny anymore… Now there was always tension between them, and even Stevie had a hard time trying to lighten the mood…

"And Sherlock Holmes has a clue about why I should avoid him?" Claire asked trying to sound amused, but her voice sounded more harsh than expected.

"Sure I have, but I feel like you're gonna kill me if I tell ya…"

Claire rolled her eyes and sighed. She was ready to hear one of her crazy ideas… "Come on, spit it out…"

"He hurt you"

"What?!? And how could he have hurt me?" Claire was trying again to sound amused, but she didn't manage very well.

"You know. He talked as if he believed you couldn't impress a boy, and you reckon he reckons you're not pretty enough…but you're wrong"

Claire shot her a look that could have killed someone, but Stevie didn't give up so easily… "Yup, you're terribly wrong" she stated again, like this was the most obvious thing in the world (and for her it actually was).

"Stevie, what the hell are ya saying? What was that tongue twister???"

Now it was Stevie's turn to roll her eyes. Maybe Claire needed a little summary of the previous chapters, like her life was a soap opera… "My point is he fancies you, but he didn't know how to tell you, and still doesn't, so he acted in the most stupid way he could. Please, forgive him, or he'll put up forever this sad puppy face everytime he sees you! It's very annoying to have him around lately!" Knowing Claire, she thought putting it to a joke was the only way to have her listen and not bite her head off… but she also had to underline it was not completely a joke… "Think about it when I'm away… promise?"

"Only if you promise you'll come back after holidays…" Claire finally granted.

"You can bet I will!" Stevie said loudly, nudging at her friend.

The remainder of the evening went on without any other uncomfortable topics and, as was planned, Jack and Claire went with Stevie to the bus stop in the early hours of the next morning.

For Claire seeing her leave was harder than she thought because this had reminded her of the other people that had left her… her mother, her sister and step-mother, even Alex… She knew that every situation was different, but still the fear of losing someone else was still there…


	15. Chapter 15

**Chapter 15**

Neither the Ryan's nor the McLeod's had any other relatives outside their respective properties, at least nobody they still talked to, and traditionally Christmas celebrations were kept for just the family, so there wasn't much time for having fun out of each other's houses for country guys…

At Drovers, obviously, the family included Meg and little Jodi. She was the one with the largest amount of presents. She was still a baby, and everyone takes pressies for a baby, it's so simple.

The most interesting part of Christmas day was always watching Jodi unpack her gifts. At first she didn't want to rip the paper, she loved the Christmas pressies' paper, and she had a very serious expression trying to figure out how she could unpack without tearing the paper. In the end she was so impatient that the Drovers sitting room had a huge heap of papers in shreds.

Claire always pretended to be bored at the sight of Jodi, but eventually she loved the little habits she had, it added a sort of traditional touch. Like they were a family, even if Jodi and Meg weren't related to her, and Claire loved the idea of having a real family… the real family she had missed all these years…

The Killarney sitting room by the way looked like a battle zone when Alex and Nick had finished unpacking. And they hadn't the excuse of the young age… they were in their old teens, but still they acted as little babies when any kind of pressie was involved… They rushed towards the packs and tried to steal the other's gifts or to ruin the surprise telling what the wrapping held.

But soon after the joyful days of Christmas Alex was in his permanent mood swing again, and he dumped it mainly on his brother's shoulders, not having anyone else to talk to… at least seriously.

"Alex, are you mad at me?" asked Nick confused one sunny day in January. His brother was avoiding him for most of the time, or he was very tough, once again. "I really don't know how Claire can stand you!" Nick continued, but he was obviously touching a painful key because Alex almost killed him with a single glare.

"Did you and Claire have a fight?" At least now Nick had a clue about why Alex was so mad…

Alex groaned something like a 'no' and Nick received another killer look.

"Come on Al, I'm your brother, I have to live with you, at least tell me why you're so unbearable lately!"

Nick was right after all… he was his brother, and it was fair to make his brother aware of his problems… Wasn't this the good side of having siblings after all? But where could he start?

"Ehm… … When I was away… you and Claire… became friends, right?"

"Yes, she's pretty cool… But you already knew that" Alex smiled quickly in acknowledgment.

"And… you two… I mean…" he didn't know what to say because he didn't know what he was going to ask, or what he wanted to know, or even where he was heading. He was searching for words that could explain what he felt, but it wasn't easy…

Nick noticed that his older brother seemed almost annoyed by his friendship with Claire… It was something he suspected for a while… "If I didn't know you I'd say you're jealous!"

Alex' answer came very quickly. "I'm not jealous! I'm just bothered because she's avoiding me"

"Are you crazy? Why for hell's sake do ya think she's avoiding you? You see her almost everyday, that usually doesn't happen when someone is avoiding you…" From Nick's point of view Claire was still friendly with his older brother, but he hadn't seen what she was like before… he couldn't compare…

"You don't understand! It's not the same!"

"What is not the same? Surely I can't understand if you don't explain it to me!" Nick said rolling his eyes. How could Alex think 'it's not the same' could explain what he meant? Sometimes he needed subtitles for his brother's talking…

"Because I know there's something wrong! I just… know… She's different… I only wanna know what I've done wrong, why she's angry with me… This can't still be for what I said back then… It was more than a month ago!" The last part was said in a low voice, he was almost talking to himself…

"Maybe it's still because you left for months and never called her" suggested Nick.

"But she said it was ok and we were mates again…" complained Alex with a sad puppy voice.

Nick shook his head smiling slightly. 'And he thinks he understands girls' he thought.

"She hates me! She doesn't want to be alone with me anymore… In the past… you know… we were alone all the time, and we talked about everything… now there's always Stevie with us… or you…" A light turned on Nick's mind. Maybe he had just understood what was bothering Alex so much…

"So?" asked Nick, but Alex looked at him like he was fool, again. "This means you were angry with me because I was the fifth wheel? And I suppose you were also angry with Stevie for the same reason…"

"No… yes… No! … I don't know…"

'Now everything is finally clear…' Nick sarcastically thought.

"Alex, you and Claire are mates, why does the fact that you two don't spend time alone anymore bother you so much?"

Alex felt like an idiot. He knew Nick had no fault, and neither had Stevie, but he didn't know what to do. He was scared of losing Claire, but he'd never thought about why he was so scared.

"What do you feel for Claire?" Nick asked then.

"What do ya mean?" Alex asked back frowning

"You know exactly what I mean! I've not heard you talk or show any kind of attention to any other girl in months! She's not just a mate for you! You're scared and angry and you don't know what to do, all the symptoms are there…" Nick said in a matter-of-fact way.

Alex stood still for a while, eyes wide. The answer to Nick's question hit him deeply. He barely heard his brother's voice again minutes later…

"Alex? What do you reckon?" When words finally reached him he half looked up.

"I think… that… probably… you're right…" Alex slowly said, sighing and sitting on the bed.

"And I guess you never told her how you feel…" said Nick, sitting beside him. Alex simply shook his head no. He couldn't talk, he still had to get used to the thought he wanted more than friendship from Claire… this thought was a little frightening … a lot frightening actually…

"Do you want some advice?" Alex nodded again, but this time the answer was yes.

"You can't simply go on like this. You have to tell her what you feel for her. If she thinks for sure that you are just mates you'll be in a dead end. You'll never move from where you are and you'll be hurt, probably you both will, even if that is the last thing you wanted to do. You see, you already are hurt… and probably for nothing…"

"But if she…" replied Alex

For the first time since the beginning of the discussion Alex was searching for his brother's eyes, and Nick could see concern in his. This was not a simple crush; he had really fallen for the girl next door!

"You'll never know if you don't try… Think about it" Nick said meaningfully, and then he left his brother alone. The last time he had given him advice Alex had done what he had suggested, maybe this time he would do the same…

Alex' head was spinning… His little brother was right… he had feelings for Claire… He had always thought that Claire was different from any other girl, but this was the very first time he had to admit he was actually in love. He couldn't deny it anymore… his heart started to race faster when she was beside him, he spent a lot of time thinking of her and just how a smile on her face could make his day.

Now he only had to do something. But what could he do?


	16. Chapter 16

**This is one of my favourite chapters… I hope you'll laugh reading this as I did writing it. :) **

**And it was also one of the first ideas I had for this story, ready way before I had completed the previous chapters…**

**Chapter 16**

Alex tried very hard for two days to think about what he could do to show Claire he was not interested only in friendship, and finally he decided the best was to do things properly: ask her on a date. Maybe she would laugh at him, but he didn't care anymore, at the very least he had to make an effort.

Once his decision was made, he only had to pull himself together and call her. He did so, late in the afternoon, when she would have probably just come in after her usual ride, hopefully in a good mood. He locked himself in his room with the cordless phone and dialled the familiar number.

"Drovers Run. Claire's speaking"

He heard Claire's voice answering the phone and froze. In that one second he had forgotten the whole speech he had arranged beforehand. "Emmm…" he clear his throat. "Claire…"

"Alex" she exclaimed a bit surprised "Something you need?"

Alex had to breath deeply before he could spit it out. "Do you wanna go out with me tonight?"

"I'm sorry, tonight I'm busy, I promised Dad I'd help him with the bookwork, but we can hang out tomorrow… Stevie will arrive tomorrow around six, she can join us at the pub…"

At first Alex was surprised she was going to answer so fast, he hoped she might at least think about it for a while, but then he understood she hadn't realized yet what his question meant, so he tried to clear the air…

"That's not what I had in mind Claire…" he said shaking his head, even if clearly she couldn't see it. He had this habit of reacting as if the person he was talking to was actually in front of him, not on the other side of the phone cable.

"But we go to the pub all the time, what's the matter? I thought you liked Stevie…" she replied, feeling a little uncomfortable. Maybe Alex was mad at Stevie for something? But what? Why? Stevie knew? Her mind had started to race almost over the moon and back in a small second…

Alex sighed and rolled his eyes. Any other girl, by this time, would have already set a place and time. Claire just didn't get it!

"I do like Stevie, she's pretty cool, but I didn't ask you out to play pool at the pub, in which case Stevie would be welcome. I meant 'go out' Claire, on a date, with me. Me and you alone."

"A date?!?" asked Claire in disbelief, like she hadn't ever heard the word before.

"Yes Claire, I'm asking you to go out on a date. You know, when a bloke picks you up, takes you to a fancy place where you can have a nice dinner…" explained Alex, amused by Claire's incredulity.

He loved teasing her, it was something he had missed so much in the last months…

When she had answered the phone he had been nervous for the first ten seconds, but this misunderstanding reminded him he wasn't actually talking to a girl like the others, he was talking to Claire, his best mate, the one he could talk to about anything, even his messed up family.

After a short silence Claire talked again, pretty upset: "Alex, are you joking? It's not funny, not at all!"

Alex couldn't help but laugh. "I'm not joking Claire." He said with a soft smile "Why should I?" but before she could answer the last question he took in his mistake. He had kind of joked about her love life once, and she hadn't liked it at all… probably she was still angry with him for that… "Ok, I know why, but this is not the case. I _really_ wanna go out with you. I know you could still be mad at me, but at least give me a chance…"

"Alex, you don't need to take me to a restaurant to make up with me, I told you we were mates again…" she said, still unsure about the seriousness of his words.

Alex rolled his eyes. You could suppose nobody had ever asked her on a date! Why? Was it so difficult to believe that he truly meant what he said?

He was about to ask that out loud, but he didn't want her to answer yes, so he tried a safer way.

"I know I don't _need_ to, the point is I _want_ to! Claire, I'm not joking or teasing you, I swear. I meant what I said"

Alex could hear her soft breath on the other side of the phone, but this was the only sound he could still perceive.

"Claire, you still here?" he asked after a while

"Are you serious?" she asked again, but this time her voice didn't sound upset, only inquisitive.

"Yeah Claire, I am serious, more serious than I've ever been" He closed his eyes and sighed, waiting patiently for her answer. Her voice had just told him she was earnestly thinking of an answer.

Now he was glad he had called her instead of dropping by, he didn't know if he would have been able to handle this conversation having Claire in front of him, looking at him with her inquisitive eyes. She was quite scary when she wanted to know something from you…

Now he was sure how deeply he wanted her to say yes, his heart was beating faster and faster during these short moments which seemed so long…

Finally he heard her voice again…

"I guess I have no reasons to say no…" she shyly said, still a bit unsure. She was half expecting him to laugh at her now, but he didn't. Actually she was almost sure she heard a sigh of relief on the other side of the phone.

Claire's answer was not the most excited ever, but for Alex it meant everything.

"So I'll pick you up tomorrow at 7 o'clock. See ya" he said, and quickly hung up, worried that she could change her mind.

Alex lay on the bed, looking at the ceiling. He was grinning and his eyes were sparkling. He was so happy he actually did it! He had been brave enough to ask her on a date, and she hadn't said no!

For the first time he let his mind wonder about Claire and him… about what could be…

Claire looked at the phone in her hand and slowly put it down. Was this really happening? Alex Ryan had just asked her a date? And, above all, she had just agreed?

She sat down, leaning back in her chair, eyes wide.

Suddenly her eyes went even wider. She had a date! What did she have to do? Did this mean she had to dress herself up?

She definitely needed some help. She took the phone again and called the only female friend she could think of, Stevie.


	17. Chapter 17

**No, it's not the date yet. But preparation is fun, right?**

**Chapter 17**

When Claire told Stevie about her conversation with Alex, the girl immediately decided to change her bus ticket and bring forward her arrival. She couldn't miss her mate dressing herself up for a date with Alex Ryan!!

Claire picked her up in the morning and Stevie almost drag her in the biggest store in Fisher (which wasn't so big, it was just Fisher), looking for a nice dress. They were driving the poor shop assistant crazy, because they had opposite thoughts on what she needed. What Claire liked was too simple for Stevie and what Stevie picked made Claire strike with horror. The dresses Stevie was choosing were nice, but just too eye-catching for Claire's liking.

"Claire, this is beautiful!!" Stevie exclaimed when Claire opened the curtain of the dressing room and show herself with a stretched red dress.

"No, it's not! I feel like I'm Jessica Rabbit!" Claire had a weird grimace on her face looking at the mirror.

"But Jessica Rabbit is sexy…" Stevie winked. Isn't that what a dress for a date mean to be?

"I don't wanna be sexy! I don't need… _this_!!" she replied blushing, then she closed herself again in the dressing room.

"Then what do you want Claire? I can help you, but I have to know. Say something!"

For a couple of seconds no answers were heard from the dressing room, just a big sigh.

"I wanna look… nice… I don't wanna look out of place, but I also don't wanna be too different from… the 'everyday Claire'…"

"Why? You have a date, usually a girl wants to be more than 'nice', more like 'amazing' I'd say!!" At least that was what normal girls wanted, but she had to remember that Claire McLeod was not a 'normal' girl…

"He knows me, he knows how I am… If I'm too 'weird' he will laugh at me…"

Stevie thought about it for a while. Nope, she couldn't imagine Alex laughing in front of a dressed up Claire… Actually she had figured in her head a very different reaction…

"I don't think he would laugh at you with this dress, I feel like he would be more likely to have his eyes popped out and his tongue on the floor!" laughed Stevie. At this comment Claire blushed tightly, feeling strange and uncomfortable.

While Claire was putting on another dress, a quite electric blue dress this time (another Stevie's choice), the red haired girl took another look through the store, quickly took some nice things and went to the cash desk. Now that she knew what the problem was, she had a quite defined idea of what Claire needed, but this was her surprise, she couldn't show her yet what she had just bought.

During Christmas holidays something had changed between the Ryan brothers. Alex, for the first time in his life, recognized that his brother truly didn't blame him about his accident and he still had plans for his life, so his guilt lightened and he could see the person he really was.

They could spend a whole evening just talking, joking and playing card games. And this happened quite frequently because Alex wasn't dating anyone (before Claire) and Nick still wasn't close to anyone in the neighbourhood.

Nick had been surprised as well while getting to know his brother better. He wasn't as superficial as it seemed from the outside. He always joked about everything, but this didn't mean he took everything lightly; it was just his way of dealing with things. He could be really caring with people he loved

Nick had also learned something else; despite his rough surface it was very easy to hurt him. Sometimes he had noticed his brother looking at him limping around; in the last year he had thought he was feeling sorry for him, but now he was sure that his older brother blamed himself for that limp.

Nick had been angry with Alex at the beginning, not for the Rodeo, just for challenging him, so he had ridden without armour, and then he was disappointed because he never came at the hospital to see him. He was his own brother but it looked like he didn't even care if he was alive or dead. Now he was pretty sure that he couldn't face him back then because he thought it was his fault.

Slowly Nick had tried to let him know by little things that he didn't blame him, obviously without talking openly, this was something country people never did, and he was pleased to see the results. They were definitely closer, now they were not just brothers, they were more like friends, and truly cared about each other, not because, as siblings, they had to.

Alex was pacing across his room, asking the same question at least three times. Nick knew what this date with Claire meant for him, but couldn't help but being amused by his behaviour.

"Alex, I've never seen you so nervous! You'll make a hole on the floor!" he exclaimed rolling his eyes meaningfully.

Alex just threw him a strange look. "I never had a date with Claire! What if she doesn't like me?" he explained.

Nick looked at his brother like he was completely fool. "Eh?!? 'She doesn't like me'?!? She knows you already Alex! If she didn't run away yet I don't know why she should now…"

If Claire had said yes there was more than a chance that she felt the same way about him, she definitely wasn't the kind of girl that accepts an invitation just for adding a name on her carnet… But he wasn't going to tell Alex that, he deserved to be a little insecure once in a while, and besides he wasn't a hundred percent sure of Claire's feelings, so he didn't want to keep his brother's hopes up without reason.

"But it's different! You know it is!" Alex groaned back at him. And Nick could understand very well what kind of difference he was talking about… just looking at him.

The girls came back at Drovers just after lunch. They greeted Jack and Meg and ran into Claire's room in a hurry. Claire had stated there was work to be done and she had a lot of time before she had to dress up, but Stevie had already asked Jack if Claire could have the whole day free.

"Stevie, why are you pushing me like that? You're almost hurting me! I don't need half a day to get ready! You usually get ready in ten minutes!" Claire started complaining as soon as they were in her room.

"I know, but you're not me, and you're not used to it. Besides today I'm still on holiday, and I want my friend to keep me company… And you still need to tell me everything happened in the last few weeks between you and Alex" In the meantime Stevie seated on the bed and nodded Claire to do the same.

"I already told you, NOTHING!" If rolling eyes was an Olympic sport Claire could win the gold medal with her reaction now. Stevie had asked the same question at least three times in just one phone call! And now she was here and kept asking!

"So… nothing happened…so, from nowhere yesterday he decided to ask you a date?" Stevie reasoned.

Likewise Claire had thought it was a bit strange, this kind of behaviour, especially from Alex, but if Stevie had the same idea it worried Claire. "Do you think it's too weird? Maybe there's something wrong, maybe he had another reason and he didn't want to, maybe I shouldn't have agreed…"

"Ouch, stop NOW! You're running too fast! I bet he only realised he did want to go out with you, and it was about time he did!"

"Do you really think so?" This was what Claire thought too, but hearing it was different…

"I don't 'think', I'm sure of it! I knew he fancied you from the first time I saw him looking at you! Come on! I know you're worried, but I have the perfect outfit for you…" and she picked up the bag with her 'gift' for Claire.

When Stevie was done with Claire she took her friend to stand in front of the mirror and looked at her. She was still Claire, not too different from her usual self, just like she wanted, but she was nonetheless beautiful.

"So… you like what you see? It's what you asked, isn't it?"

Claire nodded grateful. She liked what she was seeing in the mirror, but moreover she was at ease with herself. "Yup. Thanks so much for your help Stevie… for everything…" Claire wasn't the hug kind of girl, but now she felt like hugging Stevie. She knew that probably she would get crazy without her in certain situations, and a date with Alex surely was one of these.

Stevie hugged her back and smiled. She was glad to be there. At Drovers she felt useful, something she missed in her family. She was the youngest of her sisters and the one never doing what she was supposed to do. Last year her parents decided she had caused enough damage at her young age and told her she was no longer welcome at home. "My pleasure! Mates exist for something, and I really had fun today"

"Me too" Claire smiled too and Stevie really felt happy for her friend. If she was right, and she usually was, Alex wasn't going to let Claire go anywhere far from him anytime soon.

The red haired girl glanced another time at her friend and put her hands on her shoulder. "I bet he'll kiss you before you re-enter in this room!" she whispered in her ear.

Claire blushed a bit. She couldn't admit it to Stevie, but she didn't mind the idea… She still remembered very well their first kiss, at her 16th birthday, and she was only too willing to repeat it… Actually, only a thought of it still made her prickle… But it still looked like a dream… she couldn't walk in the clouds yet…

Stevie suddenly woke her from her daydream. "Alex is here. Come on, let's get this show on the road!"


	18. Chapter 18

**Thanks salmiaggi for your review. ****You asked for the date, and there it is. Thanks jillaroo for beta reading this chapter and the others as well, even if I forgot to mention it.**

**Chapter 18**

Alex and Claire were standing at Drovers' front door and the only thing they could do was stare at each other. He took her hands in his and squeezed them, searching for something he could say, but he was too busy concentrating on her to think about anything else. The entire evening they had both been a lot more quiet than usual. For the first time in his life Alex was more interested in what the person in front of him said or did, rather than in hearing his own voice or thinking about his next move. He could have just watched her all evening…

Claire was breathing deeply. She was thinking about Stevie's words. Was he going to kiss her? She honestly couldn't say how the date had been going. She had no idea. She had enjoyed Alex' company, but this actually happened every time they were together. They had been laughing and talking, and she had liked every moment. Alex was cheerful too, but she couldn't say if it was a 'date' cheerful or simply a 'mate' cheerful. She just hoped she was going to know it soon.

Alex, still holding Claire's hands in his, pulled her closer and slowly leaned in. She didn't dare to move, simply waited, looking directly in his eyes.

Just when they were so close that she could feel his breath on her face they heard a noise coming from inside the house. They hurriedly pulled apart and in the same moment Jack opened the front door.

"Ah, you're here! I heard a car pulling up, then nothing. I thought it was my mind…"

Alex saw Claire smiling slightly at her father and flushing a bit, probably for what they both knew was coming before her father showed up.

It was dark out, but the light coming from the sitting room was enlightening her face. Alex glared at her once more and noticed she wasn't blushing anymore. She was cute when she blushed, but now she was more than cute, she was beautiful.

"Yeah Dad, we're here, nothing to bother about" she said rolling her eyes at Alex

"Oh, I wasn't bothered…I mean…you and Alex had dinner out before…" he said vaguely uncomfortable, waving his hand on air. "But now it's time to have a good sleep, tomorrow it'll be a hard work day…"

"Yes, I'm coming…" Claire tried again, but Jack stood there, pretending to watch the sky.

"Dad, I said I'm coming…" she repeated once more, almost begging him to let them alone, but now he was pretending to check if the door was squeaking.

Alex smiled slightly at Jack's obvious attempt of spy on them, but he didn't mind, as long as he was going to see her every tomorrow he could think of… "Jack's right, it's late. I'll call you tomorrow, ok? I'd also like to see Stevie again…" He said then, running softly his hand on her arm.

"Oh, you will, trust me! I don't think she will be leaving anytime soon…" she said pretending to be annoyed. This made Alex laugh, even if he didn't know why she was acting this way. He would have to ask her next time…

He gently squeezed Claire's hand again, smiling warmly, before Jack could turn himself from the door, and headed for Killarney's Ute.

The following morning Claire woke up happy. She had been a bit disappointed with her father, but it didn't matter anymore. Alex was going to kiss her, this was the important thing. And now she had something to wait for…Alex' call and what could happen after that…She knew she was acting like a silly teenager, just bouncing lightly around the room and grinning for no reason, but after all she was a teenager, and even Claire McLeod could be silly once in a while, right? Especially when nobody was watching…

But even when she came downstairs she couldn't help but act differently from her usual self.

Meg had to hide a smile seeing her so joyful, but didn't say a word. She kept cooking breakfast, but glanced at Jack once in a while. He was already there, but his head was dipped in the newspaper, so he practically missed the whole scene.

As Stevie entered in the kitchen she searched immediately for Claire. She could barely wait to see her face today, she was too curious to know if she had won the bet…

Claire seemed in high spirits, but Stevie's silent request for an answer passed unnoticed (or just ignored). They were not alone, so Stevie had to wait. She couldn't ask what she wanted to know in front of Jack and Meg…

Shortly after breakfast Claire saw Alex riding towards the homestead. She went and met him while he was getting down from his bike.

"Alex, what are you doing here?" she asked curious.

"If you don't want to see me I can leave…" he joked. Even though it was clear from her face that she was glad to see him there. "I was just thinking that it's been a while since we last went on a nice ride…We could make up for it tonight…"

She smiled warmly and nodded. He watched her making a step closer to him and in that moment he just wished he could kiss her, but he had a plan, he wouldn't ruin that, so he kept his hand on the handlebar and his feet right were they stood. "So… see ya tonight, same place, same hour"

"Yup"

And he rode away, leaving a still grinning Claire behind him. She had a prickly all feeling through her body, like she had had the previous evening, just before Jack's interruption.

"So?!?"

Claire jumped hearing Stevie's voice all of a sudden.

"How come you seem to be always behind me today?" Stevie was in the kitchen in the morning a bit earlier than usual, seemed to have followed her into the stable and now was behind her as soon as Alex' bike was out of sight.

"You didn't answer me!" Stevie shouted, and Claire couldn't help but tease her a bit.

"I don't remember you posing a question… 'So' is not a question…"

"You know what I wanna know! I guess the evening was good from your face… so the other thing I wanna know is if I won my bet!"

"Nope, sorry, you lost it" Claire this time was trying to be serious, but it worked only for a few seconds.

Stevie couldn't hide a bit of disappointment in her look, but Claire was biting her lower lip, and this told her there was something else she was keeping to herself… and she had to know what it was… NOW! "But? There is a 'but', right?"

Now Claire couldn't tease her anymore… she was her best friend after all, and she had helped her getting ready, so she deserved a few details… "He was going to…Dad kind of interrupted us…"

"What?!?" she asked quite shocked. She had seen Jack's reaction when Claire had told him she had a date with Alex, and he seemed quite pleased…

"Really? I thought he was happy for you…"

"Maybe, but he's still my Dad…He was only being overprotective…at least I guess he was…"

Stevie considered for a while every option, then decided she had to do something. "Ok, next time I promise I'll keep Jack inside. Even by force if it's necessary!"

Her eagerness made Claire laugh again. She was way too willing to help her, and she didn't need _this_, but in the end she was grateful to have a friend like Stevie, even if could be annoying sometimes. "Calm down Steves, I don't think it's necessary…"

"Why?"

"Because I can take care of myself! And so can Alex. I'm sure that Dad won't be a problem…Now let's get back to work, come on!"

After work Claire took a shower and dressed with care. They were supposed to go for a ride, so she wore nothing particular, just her best pair of jeans and a comfy but nice top.

She was sitting on the porch waiting for the moment she should leave, reading a horse magazine (or pretending to read it) when Stevie came back from doing her chores.

"Wow! Claire, you look great!" Stevie shouted, making Claire flush slightly. She was not used to receiving compliments; her father was the closest person she had and he wasn't exactly the compliments type…

"I don't have on anything special…"

"Yeah…but…there is something…" Stevie stared at her friend, trying to find out what was different in Claire tonight…then Claire looked up, showing her a content face.

"Here it is!"

"What?" Claire frowned

"Your face! You feel great, that's why you look great…" Claire looked down. It was true, her eyes were sparkling like they never had and she was glowing. "Ok, I think I should let you join your boyfriend…"

"He's not…" Claire muttered, "He's not my boyfriend…"

"…Yet" concluded Stevie with a wink, walking in the house.

It was time to go now, so Claire just rolled her eyes at her friend, who was still laughing loudly in the sitting room, and headed for the stable to saddle Jupiter.

**I know, I'm evil, I can't stop right here etc. sorry, but you don't have to wait long to read what happens next. Promise. **


	19. Chapter 19

**As I promised, the next chapter is up.**

**Thanks jillaroo for beta-reading.**

**Chapter 19**

Stevie came out of the house again as soon as Claire turned towards the stable and she saw Jack under the porch, standing still, staring at his daughter.

"Something's wrong?" the girl asked.

He just shook his head, but he was clearly deep in thought about something, and not something very pleasant.

Stevie waited for a while beside him, wondering what he was thinking at. She had quite an idea, it was something every caring father would feel, he was probably worried. His little daughter had a crush and he suddenly wasn't her hero anymore, someone else was. And she was facing the world outside… She was growing up so fast… He probably was wondering about this…

For a second Stevie even thought he was going to follow his daughter. It wasn't something he would normally do, but after what Claire told her about the previous evening… one never knew… so she tried to come up with a topic to discuss… something… anything to distract him long enough for Claire to be far away, out of reach.

"He really cares about her…" Stevie said, also trying to reassure him a bit, he seemed so lost now… and he still was the one that was taking care of her like her own father hadn't.

He seemed startled by her comment, but then shook his head again. "I know Steves. But love hurts most of the time… and I have the feeling it will happen… I just don't want to see my daughter hurt…"

"Neither does Alex…" Stevie was still trying to sooth him, but she also knew what his point was. She knew that love could hurt like nothing else, even if not intentionally. She just hoped her friend wasn't going to be hurt like her or obviously Jack had been.

Claire pushed Jupiter as fast as she could. She loved the feeling of the wind over her face and the muscles of the horse tensing under her. When she reached a spot where she could see him she stopped and waved at him. They still weren't very close, but when he waved back she was sure he seemed nervous.

"Hi! Am I late?" she asked dismounting just before him. She knew she was perfectly on time, but he seemed to have been waiting for a while.

"Nope. I came early. I had something to think of…" he answered absentmindedly, lightly shaking his head. "Ready to go?"

"Yup" she nodded heavily. Actually she had been waiting for this ride for hours… She kept repeating herself it was just a ride, but she knew it was special. Everything looked special to her since that phone call… Stevie had asked her earlier if she was seeing the classic "vie en rose". She had laughed about it, but she wasn't so wrong after all…

"Good. Follow me" he said with a knowing wink.

"Where are we going?" She asked walking towards the horses. She knew he didn't want to tell her, but she had to give it a try anyway…

"It's a surprise, I'm not gonna tell you!"

"You don't wanna tell me, because this is the only chance you have not to eat my dust!" she joked

"Yeah, yeah, think what you like." and he jumped on the saddle.

Claire shortly followed him and they rode away.

For a while they just rode side by side, in silence. She still didn't have a clue about where he was heading. Then finally Alex stopped and helped Claire dismounting as well.

"Sit down here" he said, placing on the ground a blanket he had with him and pointing at it.

"Why?"

Alex sighed and rolled his eyes. Claire's rational side could be frustrating, typical and funny most of the times, but also frustrating. "Please, sit down on this blanket, shut up and just enjoy the view."

Only after his harsh words did Claire notice that the sun was very low on the horizon and it was already going to set. She did what she was told and he sat beside her. The next second Alex took her hand in his.

She looked at him surprised, but he was staring at the sunset, slightly smiling. She didn't even know why she was surprised… maybe it was just because nobody had ever been 'romantic' with her, and she thought it wasn't worth, but these couple of days she had to recon she had enjoyed his romantic side…

Alex had considered every detail; everything had to be perfect. When he was coming home after their date, all he could think about was how he would have kissed Claire. He had dreamt about that almost all night, awake and asleep, and now the moment was coming…

They sat there, in silence, still amazed by the view in front of them, while the sky changed all shades of orange and red. Even if that sky was the same they could see everyday, today it was different, they were glad just to be there together, enjoying each other's company. Neither of them was speaking, yet they both knew they were experiencing the same feeling, like there was something magical around them, in the air, in the sun, in the hills, in everything was in sight. Or maybe it was just them…

Just when the last ray of sun reached their faces, he squeezed her hand and when she turned questioningly towards him he smiled.

She knew what was coming; it was something she was waiting for from the previous evening. Though she was still surprised it could be so perfect… it was really like the sun was setting just for them and this moment.

She gave another look at the sky, then she gazed at Alex and closed her eyes while he leaned forward and their lips finally met.

It was a soft kiss, like the one they had shared all those months ago, but now she knew what was coming and she knew what this meant, it was a completely different situation… now everything was just perfect…

They were alone in the world and together, what else could she wish for?

"I think it's time to go… it's already dark…" Alex stated. They were still seated on the blanket, and Claire was leaning on his chest, occasionally turning around to give him another kiss.

She looked back at him disappointed. "I guess you're right…" She slowly got up and moved to the spot where the horses were grazing, but Alex grabbed her arm and made her twist until she was facing him.

"Not before a last kiss McLeod…" And this Claire could only agree with him about.

Before Claire rode away Alex called to her. "Hey McLeod"

She looked at him smiling "Seems like you're stuck with me now…" he shouted.

"The same goes for you Ryan…" she answered laughing.

She was about to ride away again, but then something seemed to catch her attention. "By the way… why are you now calling McLeod? You usually called me Claire…"

"Everybody calls you Claire… you know I can't be one in the bunch, I have to be different from the group…" He winked at her and she couldn't help but laugh. Yeah, Alex Ryan had to be different… and he sure was, at least for her… "So see ya tomorrow then… as usual…"

"Yeah, as usual…"

It was funny that they were saying 'as usual' like they were doing this every time… when the only time they had actually ridden together everyday was almost a year before. Before his trip and their very first kiss… But it was clear for both that now it would be an old habit again, and even useful… because nobody (except Jack of course) could cast them up about that, because they weren't doing anything different from what they used to when they weren't together…


	20. Chapter 20

**Thanks Cat for beta-reading this chapter. **

**Chapter 20 **

Claire usually spent part of each Sunday having a picnic in one of the Drover's paddocks with her father. It was a sort of tradition they shared between them. They had been alone in the house for years now, so she had at least almost all dinners with him, but the picnic time was special for them both. In these occasions she could feel like his little girl again; they joked, laughed, wandered all over the property and had lots of fun together; work wasn't a topic of discussion. At least not on Sundays.

The first weekend Claire and Alex were together, the older Ryan's happened to be on a trip to Adelaide, so he was alone in the house, since Rhonda, the housekeeper, had the day off and Nick was at school.

Claire struggled for a while about asking Alex to join them or not, but in the end she decided to talk to Jack. She liked to keep that space only for her father… but on the other end this was a good chance to spend time with Alex too… and even if they could see each other basically every day, it was never for too long… When they met it was always dinner time or working time in a heartbeat…

After making the decision, she entered the study, where she knew she would have found him, and knocked lightly on the door.

"Hey Dad… can I ask you something?" she enquired, still rather shyly. Jack nodded without even looking up at her, preoccupied with the bookwork, so Claire cleared her throat till finally Jack put the pen down to give her his undivided attention.

"Ehm… do you mind if I ask Alex to join us tomorrow?" she finally blurted out in one go.

Jack's eyes widened. He knew Claire was dating Alex, and he knew they were pretty cosy, but he had no idea they were already this close… Not that he was disappointed… he liked Alex, and he was glad Claire had found someone ready to accept her like she was, stubborn and everything. He was just surprised… and maybe for the first time he was really realizing that his girl would have left her father's wing one day… Not today maybe, but soon she would…

But still there was something stirring inside him when he thought about his little Claire and Harry's son… He didn't know what it was, but he somehow had a bad feeling about it… That was why Stevie had seen him so lost in thoughts days before, it was why he was kind of controlling her after their first date… He just couldn't help the feeling that something bad was to happen to Claire, and this something was somehow related to Alex. Maybe for a while he could look after them… to make sure he was just being paranoid… At least that was what he hoped…

Claire took his reflecting as a no. She began to explain it was just one time, because he would be alone THAT Sunday only…

"Claire, of course I don't mind!" He interrupted her. "I was just thinking… but I'm glad to have Alex join us. Tomorrow, and even every Sunday if you want…"

"Really?!?"

Now it was her turn to be surprised. She was scared he would get mad or at least disappointed… didn't he like their special day anymore?

Jack smiled at the look on Claire's face, like she was a puppy just reproached by its master. She was still like a kid sometimes after all… his precious kid…

"Yeah… I know this is our thing." he explained, "but we still have almost every lunch and every dinner alone around here… It's not like we don't have enough time… so don't worry… we'll still have plenty of moments by ourselves honey…"

This time she wasn't so mad at him for being called 'honey'… She was just happy and lucky to have such a great dad…

"Thanks dad! You're the best!"

She simply smiled saying this, but the warm grin she was wearing was explaining better than every word she could say. That same grin was one of the things that Jack loved the most about his daughter, his best wish as a father would be seeing her this happy forever.

Alex and Jack were both a bit worried at ending up the fifth wheel at the picnic, but everything went just fine. The weather was perfect, the food was excellent, the place wonderful and they all had lots of fun.

Now Claire was glad Alex was there as well… it was a sort of dream having both the men in her life together, enjoying their free time, the nature and the little games she used to play with Jack…

More than once she found herself reasoning that Alex fitted in her "normal" every-day life perfectly… She still had the same habits and the same life, with a nice addition… She didn't have to change her life one bit, because he mostly loved the same things she loved.

Of course she had already noticed it when they had become friends at first, but now everything seemed to fall into place. As if Alex was there just to make her happy. Of course they had their little discussions, but they were soon forgotten.

For a month Claire and Alex enjoyed their daily rides again. Every day they met at the same hour in the same place and spent most of their time together riding, talking and kissing.

Nobody knew about them beyond the Drovers crowd and Nick. Claire wasn't exactly jumping to know what the Ryan's reaction would be. She had had the feeling they wanted to involve her in their lives, especially when Alex was in Queensland, but she still hadn't figured out why, so she had no idea if the news for them was going to be good, bad or nothing special.

Claire wasn't the kind of person to continually worry about the reaction or opinion people formed about her, but Harry and Liz Ryan had the ability to make her nervous as well as self-conscious.

Every now and then Alex tried to talk to her about it, but she just asked for more time before telling everyone… For him it wasn't an actual problem, he didn't care if his parents knew or not… His brother, the most important person, already knew, and they usually met on Drovers, out of his parents' reach…

One evening Claire and Alex were not far from the house, just watching the stars. They loved to spend time sitting on the grass, or on a blanket, just looking at the sky, talking about their plans for the future or inventing stories about the clouds or the constellations they could see.

"Look Claire!" he said pointing his finger to the sky above them.

"Look at what?" She frowned, looking at him confused.

"There's a shooting star! Did ya see it?" he asked, glancing hopefully at her.

She quickly followed the line of his arm and finger till she could see it, and then a smile made its way on her face. "Yeah!" She yelled, but did not look back at him, instead she kept her focus on the beautiful sight.

Alex was watching her and she could feel his eyes on her, even though she wasn't directly looking at him. She often felt what kind of face he had and what he thought, most of the time she was definitely right.

"What's your wish?" He asked thoughtfully, waking her from her previous thoughts. He was looking so intently at the sky that it was impossible for her to even try to read his mind.

She waited for a moment before answering, pondering the question over, then shook her head, a bit less cheerful than usual. "Nah, I don't believe in those stupid things…" She finally answered.

It was not hard for Alex to guess what she was wondering, or even who she was thinking of…

"It's Tess, right?" He murmured, barely audible.

"Sorry?" She didn't know if she was hearing things or he had he said what she thought he said.

He swallowed. He still didn't know if she was up to talk about Tess yet, but he hoped so. At least it couldn't hurt to let her know he knew she cared about her little sister… "Your wish. You wished you could have your sister back."

Claire was surprised. They had talked about Tess only once, almost a year earlier.

"Do you remember?" She asked, slightly smiling.

"Of course I do Claire!" he replied with a fake disappointed face. "But I don't think you're as good as me. What about my wish. Guess."

He had said that playfully, but Claire could see a little sadness in his eyes. Looking straight in his eyes was enough to know exactly what his wish was.

"You wish Nick's accident never happened." Alex suddenly stared downwards at the ground, feeling self-conscious. "It wasn't your fault, but you still feel guilty."

He remembered almost every word of that conversation, it had played and played in his mind a lot of times by now… It always reminded him there was something special about Claire, and there was something special between the two of them. That was why he knew for sure he had only said he was WITH Nick that day, and he had seen him fall, nothing else.

"I never said I felt guilty."

She moved nearer to him and took his hand in hers, her fingers teasing his. "But your eyes do. Every time you think of the accident your eyes become sad and gloomy."

He was looking intently at her, really considering what he could do right now, if it was worth to talk to her and risk everything… to put his heart in her hands…

Then, for the first time in his whole life, he finally decided to tell someone the whole truth about Nick's accident, to free himself from the burden he had carried with him for so long… hoping she would not end up hating him.

His eyes were dry, but he was staring into space. This was enough for her to know that this whole situation effected Alex more than anything else in his whole young life.

He told her how he had forged Harry's signature to participate, how he had been teasing Nick all the time, maybe because it was his way to make him pay for the fact that he actually was better than him, and how he had led his little brother to jump without armour, so stupid of him… and then all that blood he had seen, and the thoughts that had been going through his mind; that he had killed his little brother. The fear that everyone would hate him, knowing how bad he had been…

All the time he was scared to look into Claire's eyes, but the two of them still had their hands entangled, and this gave him courage to open his heart completely.

At the end of his tale he just let out a big sigh. Whatever would happen next, it felt good to have it all out in the open. Now he knew it wasn't so good after all to keep a secret like this to himself… always having something to hide from everyone else…

"It was my fault." He concluded. "I'm the oldest, I was supposed to look after him, but _I_ took him to the Rodeo, _I_ forged Dad's signature, _I_ drove him into this mess. Now Dad hates me and if I were Nick I'd hate me too."

"Don't be silly!" She spurted "Nick doesn't hate you. I'm sure of it, and I know you know it too. I don't think your father does either."

"Ohh, he does, believe me" He nodded forcefully. He had seen the look on his father's face every time he looked at his older son, like he was just a dumb boy, only useful for making a mess of everything.

Claire already knew Alex had had hard times at home, being scolded by old Harry all the time, but still it was hard to believe he was so sure his own father hated him… Things at Killarney had to be even worse than she had ever thought…

"Alex, look at me." She put her hand on his cheek and turned his face toward him. "It wasn't your fault." She slowly said, as to make sure he understood. "If he thinks it was… he's just wrong!" She concluded in her matter-of-fact way.

His mind was still telling him it actually WAS his fault, but her eyes and her touch could soothe him more than a million words. He smiled, taking her hand in his and squeezing it as a thank you for being there despite everything.

He still couldn't believe he was so lucky… and all had started with that stupid bet last year…

He made a note to thank Michael for that sooner or later… their last conversation had been the one about the kiss he was going to give Claire at her birthday… Then he had moved with his mother somewhere between Adelaide and Melbourne… at least that was the last he knew from a postcard he had gotten from him months ago…

That same night, before heading home, Alex suddenly turned towards Claire.

"Ah, I almost forgot to ask you something… You're going to the show tomorrow, right?"

The Gungellan Show was one of the most important events in the neighbourhood, and nobody would ever miss that… especially the McLeod's… so he already knew the answer would be a yes, but he wanted to make sure she would be there, waiting for his surprise…

"Yup, like every year." She answered, raising her eyebrow a bit. "Why are you asking?"

"Oh, nothing" he said pretending it was nothing serious, but beaming inside. "There's just something I wanted to show you…"

"Oh, what, what?" she begged him, but he wasn't going to give up. Teasing her was too much fun… and he knew his surprise was worth it…

"You'll have to wait, it's still too early for it" he smirked at her and mounted his bike.

"What do you mean by 'too early'?"

"You'll know tomorrow…" He mysteriously said, before starting the engine and driving off in a dust cloud, leaving an impatient Claire behind.

**Heheheh… as usual I leave you with something to wait for… P**

**Let me know what you think.**


	21. Chapter 21

**Curious to know what the surprise is? **

**Thanks Jill for helping me. **

**Chapter 21**

Claire arrived at the Gungellan show with Jack and Stevie in the middle of the morning, a few seconds later she noticed Alex standing not far from her. As soon as he looked up and spotted her a cheeky grin appeared on both their faces.

Stevie rolled her eyes at her two friends, standing just a step apart, literally beaming… She had half expected that after a month they would have stopped acting like foolish teenagers… but she was wrong… they were worst everyday…

"Maybe you two could greet properly and stop making this silly faces!" Stevie couldn't help but point out. There was no sense is staring at each other and not even getting closer…

Alex and Claire both turned towards her, a bit startled by the question. It took them a couple of seconds to come down from dreamland and pay attention to what Stevie had said.

"Mum and Dad are up there…" Alex explained to both the girls.

Giving a quick look behind his shoulder Claire saw the elder Ryan's walking to greet her father and nodded, but this answer clearly wasn't enough for Stevie.

"You should really explain to me, why they still don't know about you two? I know they are a bit scary sometimes, but this scary?!?" Stevie hissed, rolling her eyes again. "Common! They can't kill you!" she added with a smirk.

Claire and Alex looked at each other questioningly. "It's not that…" Alex started to explain, but actually he didn't know how he could carry on an explanation when he didn't even remembered why they were hiding from his parents.

They had agreed at the beginning, but now, after a month, were the reasons still there?

"It's just…" Claire stammered, trying to continue Alex' explanation was interrupted, much to their relief, by Jack and Harry, both walking towards them. Luckily Liz Ryan had some other friends to greet because she was even harder to deal with than Harry.

"Hi Alex" Jack greeted with a smile. He knew Harry still didn't know about them, and, like Stevie, he thought it was a bit funny watching the two of them pretending they were just friends… when it was pretty clear they weren't just from their glowing faces… This hiding thing could go on just because Harry was too taken by his job and Liz by her social meetings to notice what happened in their sons' lives.

After the general greetings, Jack proposed the young people to go and show Stevie the place. The three immediately agreed and left the older ones there talking about business stuff.

When Stevie had seen every stand of the show she suggested that the other two would leave her alone and take a walk by themselves. She knew they were happy to have her around, but she also knew that they could do with a few time alone… besides she liked to take a look around the place by herself, just going whenever her legs leaded her.

Claire and Alex had been walking for a while, talking about everything and nothing, when she dared to ask him about his surprise without sounding too desperate.

"Alex……ehm…what's the thing you wanted to show me?" she enquired, giving him a seductive smile.

He smiled and gently took her hand in his. "Come with me" He just said, dragging her behind a stand, in a place a bit less crowded.

"Do you remember what day is it today?"

"It's Saturday," Claire answered a bit confused "but…"

"No, I mean, think, WHAT day is it today?" he said, stretching every words, hoping she would take the hint.

Claire's face lightened in a worm smile, soon matched by Alex'. "Oh my…Do you remember…"

"Of course I remember Claire! It's our first month together, how could I forget? And I have a gift for you…" After flashing her another smile he reached for his pocket.

"You didn't have to…" she slightly protested.

Alex stopped searching and looked straight into her eyes. "Yes, I did have to. This has been the most wonderful month in my life and I want to thank you for this; for this and for being here, with me and for me, whenever I need you. Come on, open it"

He handed her a dark velvet jewellery box and she slowly opened it, feeling her heart beating faster.

"I know that you always wear the pendant Jack gave you, this is just another necklace you can wear with it… You said the lock of the old one was almost broken… This way we could both be with you, me and Jack…"

Claire's eyes widened. It was a simple thin gold necklace, but she loved it, in her eyes it was the most perfect gift. He had thought about something she would have liked and he had chosen this for her, so how could she not love it?

She smiled and wrapped her hands around his neck, hugging him tightly, then she gave him a soft and loving kiss on the lips.

"Someone could see us…" He said half worried and half incredulous.

"I don't mind… Actually I don't remember a single reason not to tell everyone…"

They were staring into each other's eyes, barely aware of the world around them. They were living that moment like it was in slow motion, savouring every second.

"Good, because I'm going to kiss you properly this time…" He winked. They could be together from a month now, but it was still a sort of daydream… Now he would have been able to hug Claire or kiss her or just look at her lovingly without worrying about anyone… heaven…

Alex put his hands on Claire's hips as they leaned forward. When their lips were almost touching they heard a voice behind them.

"Hey mate! Congratulations are in order I see!"

Alex turned, recognising that voice immediately, even if he hadn't heard it in a while…

"Michael?!? You're with us again?" Alex exclaimed, a bit astonished to see him there after all these months.

"Yup. I'll stay at my old house with my father for a couple of weeks." He explained.

"I was just wondering about you the other day… It's good to see you again. I'll give you a call then…" Alex said holding out his hand for him to shake but not removing his other hand from Claire.

He was really happy to see him, and knew they had a lot to catch up on, but he also hoped his friend would have taken the hint and left him alone with Claire, he was still waiting for this proper kiss after all…

But Michael surprised him with his next words, "Hey mate, looks like my horse is waiting for you …"

"What do you mean Michael?" Alex asked absentmindedly, still distracted by the thought of Claire and their coming up kiss…

"Yeah, yeah, you're pretending you don't know anything about it? She kissed you in front of everyone, I admit I lost the bet, the less you can do is admit you won…" he joked.

Alex stood still; he was really dumbstruck. It took him a while to understand what his friend was saying, and what this all meant. When he had heard Michael's congratulations comment he thought he was referring to Claire and him, he couldn't think he was still thinking at that stupid bet! After all this time!!

A faint smile appeared on Claire's face as she turned towards Alex. She was expecting to see him a bit amused, but he was serious, like he knew what Michael was talking about.

"Alex… what does this mean?" she asked, a bit worried. What if that story was true and she was just… a bet… No… it couldn't be possible… Maybe Alex was just being his idiot self and it was a joke… even if this was a really bad joke…

Alex was still too shocked to talk, and this gave Michael the chance to explain his side of the story.

"We made a bet… months ago… he betted you were going to kiss him in public… He thought he could manage quicker, but he still succeeded. I didn't think he could manage even in his whole life so… I can safely say he won…"

Claire pulled away from Alex, horrified. This couldn't be true… just couldn't… but why he didn't say anything? Why he didn't laugh saying this was stupid and silly and Michael was just joking? And she wasn't just a prize to be won…

Claire felt her world falling apart. It had been all so perfect… and now the dream was over… Everything was fake… it was just a bet… and he had made a fool of her…

She couldn't stand to see him now…

Alex saw Claire go away. He tried to call her back, but he knew it was useless for the moment; he had to sort this mess with Michael first, he had to know why his friend was still thinking the bet was still on… Michael wasn't an angel, but they were close once, he couldn't be so ugly to talk about the bet on purpose… knowing this would have probably lead to a break up…


	22. Chapter 22

**Thanks Jill for beta reading. **

**I know, the situation is serious, and I know I'll disappoint every reader saying that it won't solve so easily. But… there's always a 'but', right? Gotta be…**

**Chapter 22 **

Alex was still staring in the direction Claire had disappeared. Not daring to move. Knowing that turning back he wouldn't have seen his girlfriend beside him.

Michael watched Alex' upset face and tried to joke. "Seems like you really care about her…"

Unfortunately for him Alex definitely wasn't in the mood for jokes of any kind.

"Of course I care!" he yelled at him. He couldn't believe Michael thought so little of him to think he couldn't care less of the girl he was dating! Maybe in the past he had broken a few hearts, but never light heartedly… and none had ever been even remotely as important as Claire was to him…

"She's my girlfriend! Or she was… I don't know now…" Now Alex' face was really crushed. The more he thought about it, the more he was sure Claire wasn't going to forgive him easily…

"Are you serious? Alex Ryan is worried about just a girl?"

"She's not 'just a girl' Michael, she's… Claire… she's my Claire… I can't lose her…" Alex was trying to explain what Claire meant to him, but it wasn't so simple… words couldn't really describe what it was like to have someone who could lighten your day just by being there…

"Oh come on Alex, I'm sure you can find another girlfriend, it's never been a problem for you…"

Alex shot him a sideways glance. There was a time when he was popular, and he was proud of it, but now it didn't matter… He didn't need to be popular to have Claire back… he was sure of it… she couldn't care less of such stupid childlike things… that was one of the reasons he had to like her so much from the very beginning…

"Did you hear me? She's not just a girlfriend for me… she's my best friend, she's too important!! I need to talk to her…"

Alex still wanted to know why his 'friend' had mentioned the bet, but right now he didn't care, he couldn't stand to be near him. Without even a look back at Michael he ran towards Claire, but she wasn't anywhere to be seen.

He wandered across the fair, but it was useless. It was like she had simply disappeared from the face of the Earth. He was reliving his first day back, at the Narrandow Rodeo, when he had looked for her all morning but found her only after hours. Back then he didn't know how things stood between them either, but now it was definitely worse. Now he knew what he would be missing without her in his life… and now he knew she was hurt… and it was his fault, even if unintentionally, and this hurt him even more.

Two hours later Alex was still aimlessly pacing when he ran into Stevie.

"What's up?" she asked with a frown at his upset face.

"Have you seen Claire?" He asked back with a glint of hope in his eyes.

"Not since you took her somewhere… playing hide and seek, eh?"

Then she seemed to realize something… "What have you done this time?" She asked sounding slightly annoyed. She had seen quite some fights between them in the last month, but after a while they were unable to keep sulking, so she wasn't really worried…

"Nothing!! She thinks I did, but it's just a big misunderstanding… I don't blame her for leaving but I can explain, she just has to listen…" he almost begged.

"From the look on your face it looks like it's a big big mess…" He was more nervous every second, so it had to be a lot worse than she had first expected…

"Please, Stevie…"

She knew where he was heading… he was about to ask her again to help him with Claire… "No! Not again! You know last time I tried, but it was useless. Why now should it be different? Anyhow I need to listen to her side of the story first… She's my duty as her friend…"

"I know, I'm not asking you not to…" He shook his head for a few seconds, then he let out a big sigh. "I guess I'll have to find a way… by myself…"

Alex let out another sigh and turned to leave when Stevie called him.

"Alex…"

"Yeah?"

"For what it's worth… I'll keep my fingers crossed for you two…" She half smiled at him, to let him know she was serious, and she saw him trying to smile back at her, but without great success.

"Yeah, I know… Thanks anyway"

When Alex was already wondering if Claire was at home by now, he finally ran into her. Actually they almost crashed into each other, so he thought this could be the chance he needed…

"Claire…" he pleaded, putting his hand on her arm, but she just shrugged off his hand and tried to leave.

"I can't… not now…"

"But…" he tried again, but she turned toward him with a cold scary glance, that hurt him like a sword. She had never looked at him that way before…

"I know, always the same old story… I can explain, it's just a misunderstanding, blah, blah, blah, Stevie already told me. I don't care. When Michael was babbling about that bet I thought it was a mistake, but you… you didn't say a thing, so he wasn't lying. Now I need to be left alone, I can't even look at you! And I sure as a hell don't think I can trust you anymore. As you can see… it's useless explaining if I don't trust a single word you're saying…"

"But… Claire… I…"

"Go away Alex! Did you hear me? Just… go away… get lost!!" she yelled, not giving him any chance to reply.

After his conversation/fight with Claire he was even more shattered. How would she ever get to trust him again if she wouldn't even listen? And how could he get her to listen if she didn't trust him? It was a never-ending circle…

Trust had always been their bond… what made their relationship special… and now it was over… and right now he couldn't see a single way to work things out…

When it was time to get back, Harry found his oldest son sitting on a bench, staring at his feet.

"Something's wrong son?" He asked putting his hand on Alex' shoulder. It was obvious something had happened, but he had no idea what it could be.

Alex heard the question, but couldn't answer… Not the truth anyway… Harry didn't even know about him and Claire, he couldn't say anything now… it would be a waste of time…

"Nah… It's just… I saw Michael Davies… We had a fight, but it's nothing…" He wasn't even lying when he said they had had a fight… it just wasn't the reason he felt broken… "Can we go home now?" He quickly tried to change the topic.

Harry nodded and led him to their Ute.

When they pulled up at home Alex jumped up to his room, stating he had something important to do.

"Rhonda said dinner is almost ready dear…" Liz informed him, when he already was taking the stairs two by two.

Ten minutes later Liz came up to check on Alex again and found him sitting up on the bed, with a gloomy look on his face. "It's all right darling? Why aren't you coming downstairs? Dinner is getting cold…"

"I don't feel like eating tonight Mum… sorry…"

Liz' eyes widened. "Are you sick? How are you? Can I call the doctor…" In all her life she had heard this statement only 2 or 3 times, and never from her oldest son. Not to mention he had even apologized for not being hungry!

"No, Mum, don't worry, it's just headache. It's been a bad day, tomorrow I'll be fine."

Liz left the room, not before checking his forehead to see if he had a fever. She was still convinced there had to be something else wrong, not just headache, but only time could tell…

When his mother left him alone he collapsed on the bed and left tears running through his cheeks. He had lost her. Maybe forever this time… He wasn't going to be fine tomorrow… not at all… and there was nobody he could talk to. Besides his brother, she was his only true friend, and Nick, the only one that could help him, wouldn't be back from school for another week…


	23. Chapter 23

**Chapter 23**

A couple of weeks had passed after the Gungellan show. Alex was just coming back from the usual shower after work when he had an inspected visit. There, in his sitting room, there was Michael Davies.

Alex didn't know whether to jump at his throat or greet him properly. Their latest meeting hadn't been the friendliest one… but back then he was too upset to think straight.

"Hi Alex" Michael started, rather shyly. And this shyness made Alex resolve to listen to whatever he was going to tell him. His old mate had always been everything but shy, so something had probably happened to make him change.

"Hi Michael. What brings you here?" Alex asked, both curious and anxious.

"I'm leaving tomorrow, but I was wondering if you could give me a few minutes first…"

Alex nodded, still a little confused, and leaded outside. "Okay, let's go in the back garden, follow me"

They were so lost in thoughts that no words were exchanged till they were both seated and with a drink in front of them. Just then, Alex looked up to the guy in front of him.

"So… what were you going to tell me?"

Before starting, Michael sighed deeply, but keeping his face up. He wanted Alex to understand he was telling the truth, at least this time. "It's about that day at the show…" Alex was fidgeting in his seat, and was probably going to say something, so Michael stopped him. "Let me finish, please. You know it's not easy for me"

They had known each other for quite some time, and they were pretty much alike, so Alex could really understand how hard it was for him to do what he was doing, so he nodded and let him go on with his speech.

"That day I was just coming back from my new place. I saw you with Claire and I thought you knew I was coming and wanted to show me you had succeeded… I had no idea she was really your girlfriend…"

Alex's eyes widened. How could someone he counted as a mate being so wrong about him?

"But I could never do this to anyone, not just Claire!"

"I know that now… but back then I was angry and jealous… I guess this made me a bit bitchy…"

"Angry and jealous?!? Why?"

"Yeah… I was angry with the whole world because I couldn't choose where I had to live, everything was, and still is, someone else's choice… And I was jealous about anyone who had what I couldn't have… I missed my family… something you still have…" Michael looked down, pausing for a few seconds, then looked up again. "But I assure you I'd have apologized before if I had known the mess I created…"

What kind of mess? What did he know exactly? Who had he talked with? "What do you know about this supposed big mess?"

"A few days ago, in town, I met a red haired girl. We were introduced and when she heard my name she started yelling at me and hitting me…"

Alex couldn't help but laugh imagining the scene… There was no doubt the girl was Stevie, and she could be pretty scaring…

"It was not so funny being there instead of hearing the tale…" Michael assured, and Alex could easily believe him about that…

"Yeah, I can imagine… I know who the girl is, and I know how she can be…"

"I understand she's a friend of Claire…"

"Yeah, she's a friend of mine too… or was…"

Alex shook his head, wondering if Stevie would have ever considered him as a mate again or if he was in her bad books too, and Michael figured out his thoughts. "Another thing I messed up I guess… There's something I can do for you? Maybe I could talk with Claire…" he suggested

"Thanks for your interest, but I don't think she would let you talk at the moment… She doesn't even want to talk with me…" And then Alex smiled again wondering how Claire would have reacted seeing Michael in front of her.

But likely enough she wasn't as mad at him as she was at himself… Michael had never lied to her… they had barely talked a couple of times…

He needed to change subject, or sadness could have the better of him. "So… what exactly Stevie told you?"

"At first nothing understandable, I just remember that this thing hurted Claire and you two are made for each other and something like that…"

"Yeah… something like that…"

Again Michael noticed this note of sadness in Alex' eyes that made him feel a bit more guilty. He knew Alex was in a mess right now, and he felt bad, but there was nothing he could do… "What are you going to do now?"

"I don't know yet. For now it's probably better if I stick to leave her alone… When she'll be ready to talk to me… who knows…"

"Yeah… who knows…"

Once more it was Alex changing the subject when it started to be uncomfortable for him… "So you're leaving?"

"Yes, I am. And I don't know when I'll come back. My father isn't too keen on having me around…"

The day of the show Jack had easily noticed something was wrong, but Claire didn't want to talk about it until they were at home and even then, she just said that she and Alex had broken up.

Stevie was less shocked than Jack for the news, so had a chance to observe his behaviour. She expected him to be angry as a hell with Alex, remembering his previous worries about Claire being hurt, but instead he just seemed concerned about his daughter. He had been great actually, supportive as a father could be, and he wasn't even making a fuss wanting to know, one way or another. The first meeting between Jack and Alex hadn't been the friendliest one, but nobody had been killed…

After a month Claire still didn't want to talk to or about Alex. The guy had tried everything, but she had done a good job in building a wall around her. Jack still hated to see his daughter so changed, but by now he had even started to feel sorry for him because he could see how this thing was affecting Alex too. He was different from his usual corky self… he was a lot more quiet, and this could only be because of whatever had happened with Claire.

Jack, Stevie and Meg knew better than to ask Claire, but they couldn't ask Alex either, or they heads would have been ripped off by Claire as soon as she knew… so they were completely tied up, there was nothing anyone could do… besides Claire.

If only Alex could explain…

But he knew Claire was not so forgiving, especially when someone she trusted would let her down, and he definitely had. As things stood by now, he was lucky if she ever would talk to him again…

When Claire's birthday came again, the reminder of the last years was still painful for both the guys.

The previous year Alex had considered the option of writing a letter to explain his departure, but he had decided it was better tell her face-to-face. But now he could see her only by chance, in Gungellan for supplies, fixing fences or at some town meeting, and never really talk. He had nothing to lose…

He filled a lot of papers unsuccessfully, everytime throwing the paper in the rubbish bucket, but then he managed to write something he was satisfied of. Nick had read it, and he thought it could work…

Alex had almost expected a lecture from his brother about doing this bet in the first place, but he hadn't lectured him. Instead Nick had been very thoughtful… trying to distract him or keep his hopes up.

They had spent together a lot of time lately, and this spared Alex the trouble to find a reason to explain why he was at home so often and not seeing any other mate or even girl… when someone asked, he just used to say he had a lot to catch up on with his little brother during his holidays.

And this was truth… They both felt they had missed so much in each other's life from the accident. Life hadn't been the same for too long…

**As usual, a big thanks to Jill.**


	24. Chapter 24

Thanks Jill for beta reading and for you opinions. Chapter 24 

It had taken Stevie a whole week and a lot of patience to let Claire open up and confide her what had happened at the show.

At the beginning she was entirely on Claire's side, but by now she was not so sure… Her inner curiosity was telling her there was something else in this story that could clear the mess. Hadn't she known from Alex' eyes the day of the Gungellan show, she would have known now from the look on Alex' face everytime they met…

In this perspective she agreed on delivering Alex' letter. She only hoped the explanation was good enough and was not going to upset Claire even more…

She was supposed to deliver the letter the morning of Claire's birthday, and she had really kept her fingers crossed for them all the time from the moment she had had the letter in her hands.

But Stevie's curiosity was not going to be satisfied so easily because, as soon as Claire had the paper in her hands, she tore it in a million pieces and threw it away, mumbling that it was the worst birthday ever. She was too stubborn and proud to admit there could even exist a reasonable explanation…

"Don't you think you could regret one day to have thrown the letter away without even take a look inside?" Stevie tried to reason with her, but Claire didn't even think before answering a clear "No"

"Why not?" She asked again, hoping to catch Claire's blue eyes with hers, but unsuccessfully.

"Because I don't want to have anything his anywhere near me"

This reminded her of Alex' necklace. That awful day, getting home, she still had the box in her hand, which had been tightly wrapped around it. She had put it in a drawer and never opened it again. Now the thought that Alex' gift was up in her room made her sick, and she decided she had to sent it back. This was the only thing that could make her feel a bit better right now.

"But Claire… be reasonable… He just wants to talk to you…"

"I don't want to talk to him. I can't face him yet, so, please, understand me and leave me alone"

Stevie couldn't but do as she was asked, at least for now. She could see Claire wasn't happy and tried to work harder and harder to have something else to focus on, and somehow she was even succeeding… She was learning a lot about how to run a property, and pretty soon she would have been as good as Jack… but there was something missing in her life… as Alex Ryan… as the sparkle she always had in her eyes joking with him, the lively way she went for a ride just to feel the wind on her face…

After their last talk Alex' name was a taboo. Instead of getting better this thing was getting worst everyday… Wasn't time supposed to heal wounds?!?

Claire by her side couldn't stop thinking. Everytime she stopped working or focusing on something else her mind returned to Alex and their friendship. It all had started so fast, a few weeks after he had moved in to be her neighbour… They had always something to talk about, something to share… She had told him things neither Stevie nor her father knew… and now she couldn't think it had been just a bet for him… from the beginning… She really trusted him, and he had betrayed her in the worst way she could think of. She had images in her head of him joking and laughing about her naivety with Michael or some other friends… images she couldn't delete everytime the thought or the name of Alex reached her mind… That was why she couldn't have anything to do with him… for her sake…

Like Jack, Harry too, had noticed there was something different in his son's behaviour, but couldn't think of a valid reason. After a while he decided to talk to Jack about it, father to father.

"Alex is acting weird lately… I don't know what it all could be about…"

Jack had a difficult time to suppress a chuckle. Harry Ryan was the wisest man on earth when it was about business, but could be very clueless when it came to personal matters… Jack knew exactly what his friend was talking about, but he couldn't say it. Harry was completely different from Jack, but the two had gotten along pretty well from the beginning. But this wasn't reason enough to betray his daughter's secret and would never be.

"I don't know… Maybe it's just a phase… you know how it is with boys… at his age everything seems black or white, and even every little thing means the world…"

"Yeah, but he has never been like this!" Alex was still fine, healthily speaking, and was still doing his share of work at Killarney, so Harry wasn't really worried, but he couldn't help but wonder what could have happened he knew nothing about to make him feel he didn't know his older son anymore.

"Maybe he started now… I told you, it's a phase… They'll grow up… and sooner than you think… so enjoy his youth while you can…" Jack suggested, patting his hand on Harry's shoulder.

"They'll grow up?!? Claire is the same?"

So… apparently even Harry could take a hint, once in a while… "Uhm…" Jack didn't mean to spill the beans, but it had slipped… "Yeah… lately she's a bit weird too but, hey, she's just seventeen…"

"I guess I have to get used to it, don't I? And in a few months I'll have Nick too in these circumstances…"

"Likely enough" Jack agreed, and both the men laughed.

Harry decided just to leave Alex alone and wait for him to be his old self again. His mind kept telling him it had something to do with Claire, but he didn't have info enough to complete the puzzle.

Alex missed the complicity he and Claire used to have, the way they had to just spend time together, no matter what they did. He missed his friend, his best friend actually. She had to know it had not been a lie… but how? The letter hadn't been successful, so he needed something else… He wanted to show her that he could wait for her to be ready; he could wait for as long as she needed, because the most important thing was having Claire back in his life.

And there was only one way to let her know this all…

Stevie knocked and entered Claire's room. She didn't like the task she had, but mostly she didn't like the reaction Claire could have. Maybe for the first time in her life, for this Alex thing, Claire McLeod had showed signs of 'teenhood', and it didn't suit her. She was too good for sulking, and too stubborn to admit she was wrong. She had to make her stop teenagering… one way or another… This could be a good chance like any other one…

Claire smiled at her friend and nodded her to sit on her bed, but Stevie just stepped closer, looking seriously at her. She had to spill everything without giving Claire the chance to stop her or distract her. And she knew it wouldn't be an easy task…

"A certain person told me to tell you that he'll be waiting for you every day at the same hour in the same spot, you know where, until you'll be ready to talk to him." She had been in town with Meg and had met Alex… They had had a good chat, and he, once again, had somehow managed to let her agree to his request. For Claire's sake. "He seemed quite sure Claire. Maybe he deserves a chance… Think about it…"

Claire's face darkened. She wasn't supposed to be reminded of this… she had been hurt, she had every right to be angry, she had every right not to want him in her life… So why did everyone seem to feel sorry for her because Alex wasn't her friend anymore?!? She could handle her life even without him…

"Tell him he can leave it because I won't go. Never."

"Don't be so ultimate Claire, one day you could regret it."

Stevie sounded quite sharp, and it was exactly her intent. It was easy to just stand beside her and let her act however she wanted, but, as her mate, she felt she had to make her see the point, and let her face the situation. And not softening things.

"I know what you think, you already told me, so shut up, will you?" Claire snapped.

And Stevie did as she was told. Besides everything else, she couldn't let this ruin their friendship. And she also knew that Claire still was still going to need her when she was ready to move on and stop sulking.


	25. Chapter 25

**Thanks Jill for beta reading, as usual. ****Sorry for the wait, but I'm pretty much stuck at the moment, and I still have just a couple of chapters ready.**

**Chapter 25**

It was a rainy day, probably the most rainy day ever. No work could be done outside. Even walking was hard, due to the huge layer of mud. Jack and Claire had spent the day updating all the bookwork, so now there was nothing else they could do except waiting for dinner to be ready.

Claire was in her room, and Stevie was keeping her company. It was hard to work around Claire's grumpy face sometimes, especially when she was forced to stay indoors, but Stevie was willing to let her take it out on her from time to time. Stevie had to admit that even grumpy Claire had her funny side…

Claire was gazing out of the window. More correctly, she was gazing toward the place she used to meet Alex…

"Do you think he still goes sometimes?" she murmured, more to herself than to her mate.

Stevie's eyes got wide at the note of regret in her voice. Stevie was perfectly aware of what she was talking about… but still she couldn't believe Claire could be so blind. Alex had tried everything to make her talk to him again, and now she was asking if he 'sometimes' still went to their place?!?

Stevie knew for sure he was there everyday, as promised. So, when she spotted his big frame, sitting on the grass, from time to time she had a chat with him…

Every hint of anger at Alex for hurting Claire was faded away long time ago, at least from the letter. He had admitted more than once, during their friendship, how much he hated writing, so the letter was a definite proof he had it bad for Claire.

"Every time I was around there in the last days I saw him, sitting on the ground, waiting." The thought of him, all alone, with a comic in his hands, but ready to jump up at the first sound of hooves, made her resolve to try once again convincing her stubborn mate. "He's swallowing his pride for you Claire… Please, go, just once"

Claire just shrugged her shoulders, still looking out, with her back at Stevie.

She wouldn't admit it, even to herself, but she missed Alex. Not just her boyfriend, but the boy she used to talk to about everything, the boy that could race and ride with her all day long without getting tired.

And this was the reason why she couldn't see him now. She didn't want to be blinded by her missing him. She didn't want to be the object of another joke. She was still too hurt to let something like that happen again.

Not that she honestly considered something like that likely to happen again. Alex was wise enough not to do anything that could lead her to kill him. She just couldn't allow herself to have a doubt; she wasn't strong enough to bear doubts yet. It was way safer to avoid any chance.

"Now he'll be in his room anyway, playing stupid computer games with Nick. Liz won't allow him to leave the house while it's raining cats and dogs…"

"She would be right…not even the sheep would like to be outside with this crappy weather…"

Both laughed at this and the mood improved slightly, but the topic didn't come up again. Stevie knew she had done whatever was in her power, now it was up to Claire.

A few days later, after a lot of wondering, Claire decided that maybe Stevie was right and Alex needed a chance.

She blamed the ride for her racing heart, but deep inside she knew she was making a big step, a big step that could change everything… Seeing Alex and listening to what he had to say meant that she could maybe even trust him… if the explanation was good enough…

But was she ready to let him in again? Was she ready to get back in the game?

Once she was in sight of their place she sighed deeply before looking up from the horse, but when she did her breath stopped abruptly.

The place was deserted. Nobody was there.

He wasn't there.

Whether Stevie was lying, or Alex had stopped coming just now. Why?

But it didn't really matter.

He wasn't there. That did matter.

Once again he had disappointed her, and she swore to herself this was the last time she allowed him to do it. This was the last time she would let him hurt her.

Nobody knew where she was gone to, but Stevie guessed it as soon as her friend rushed in the house, literally fuming.

After a few minutes Stevie dared to open slightly the door of her room. "Claire, are you ok?" the red girl carefully asked.

"No, I'm not. But I need to be alone, please." She begged. Stevie knew she couldn't but do as she was told, as usual, at least until Claire was ready to tell why she was so upset.

After spending the whole evening and the night in her room, Claire finally joined the others for breakfast. The only explanation the others got was an upset stomach that now was gone. Everyone was pretty much conscious that this had something to do with Alex, especially because nobody could even name him in front of Claire for days without her storming out of the room, but this knowledge didn't make things any better.

At the end of the week Claire from the stable heard her father telling Meg he was going out, and it was weir considering that it was the middle of the afternoon, too early for the pub but too late to go into town. Anyway she didn't give it too much a thought, it happened sometimes that he went for a ride at every hour, usual or unusual, so she kept brushing Jupiter.

"Claire, I'm going to Killarney. You should come with me…" Jack told her daughter peaking his head into the stable.

"Why?"

Usually Jack went to talk to Harry, they talked about workers and poker, nothing interesting, so there was no reason for her to go with him, especially now that one of the inhabitants of the house was a no-go topic.

"I know you two broke up and it's none of my business, you already told me, but you've been friends since he came in this area, I'm sure he'd like to see ya."

"He has legs, he could come here instead,…" she grunted, but not so sure about her own words. She knew he had tried, but every time he was around she disappeared somewhere…

"Come on, of course he can't! I'm sure Liz won't let him leave the house for at least a month! His pneumonia was quite bad and she's still upset he left the house when he was supposed to be in his room…"

Claire felt like a bucket of icy water had been poured over her. What was he talking about? Pneumonia?!? She wasn't a doctor and didn't know that much about illnesses, but that word sounded pretty bad in her head… "What? Pneumonia?!?"

Jack felt a bit guilty seeing Claire's face turning pale, but how could he possibly know she hadn't heard anything? In the house they had been talking a lot about this lately… But probably not when Claire was around… And then, maybe, a little fear about Alex' health could make her rethink about her current behaviour. Sure Alex had done something wrong, or she wouldn't have been that angry, but it was still weird to see his daughter acting so irrationally about whatever concerned Alex Ryan. The more she got on like this, the more he missed his too rational girl that always put work first and liked talking to horses better than to human beings.

"Yes. Last week, do you remember, when it was raining so heavily, apparently he left his room from the window and got a cold. He didn't tell anyone and nobody noticed until two days later, when he wasn't at home for dinner. Apparently Nick knew where he was going and they found him unconscious in the grass, shaking from fever. He's been in hospital for a few days…"

"I… I… didn't know…" was all Claire could mutter. Guilt was starting to creep up on her, along with a strange pain in her stomach. "Dad?"

"Yes?"

"He'll be alright?"

She was clearly searching for reassurance. He hated to see his daughter so upset, but the only thing he could do was smiling at her, both to let her know there was nothing serious to worry about and to tell her he was there to talk and support her if she needed him.

"I called this morning, he's been discharged from hospital and short visits are allowed, so I reckon he'll be fine. He still has fever, but it's lower every day… So, are you coming?"

"I can't… maybe tomorrow…" she said shaking her head, not believing her words herself. "Dad, please, tell him… tell that…"

Tell him what? That she was sorry? Sorry for what? Because he was ill? Because he was ill and it was her fault? Or because she was angry with him for not coming while he was in hospital?

And what did he think about her now? He was angry? Did he even want to talk to her at all? Did he think it was her fault? All this was running so fast in her head that she couldn't think straight. The only thing she knew for sure was that she couldn't see him for now. "Never mind"

It was her fault. He was waiting for her… and she had been so stupid to be angry with him for not coming when _she_ had stated it was completely useless. And however he was there. Under the rain.

How incredibly brainless was that?

Maybe another girl would have though it was romantic… but Claire wasn't this kind of girl. Her rational side was coming to the surface, and her rational side was telling her that Alex had been stupid, but ihe had been stupid because of her, so it had to be her fault.

"What have I done?" she whispered to herself.


	26. Chapter 26

**Thanks Jill for beta reading. **

**Chapter 26**

It took Claire a whole week to finally convince herself she had to go, no less than because she would have been an awful neighbour otherwise. Harry and Jack were still mates, so this made Alex a sort of close family friend…

Claire entered the Killarney sitting room on an early afternoon, with Jack, and Liz instantly called out for Harry to entertain their guests with her. Alex' mother looked like she had something like a million things to do, arranging everything for tea, barking orders, excusing herself to make very important phone-calls…

While she was out of the room Jack even made a comment about her bee behaviour, and Harry answered it helped her not freaking out after the fear they had gone through. Jack nodded. Even if he didn't seem so much convinced, to Claire it made sense, a lot of sense actually. Lately she was even keener than usual to do whatever she was asked for, as far as she could keep her mind busy. Even if hers and Liz' reasons were way different… Liz had been scared to lose her own son, Claire felt guilty about what had happened, and she didn't want to feel guilty. She didn't need to be guilty, he had no right to make her feel guilty… nonetheless she did feel guilty, she just couldn't help it.

All these contrasting feelings were making her so nervous that she even had trouble understanding what the others were talking about.

Actually, now that she was there, she just wanted to get this over and done with. She wished she were already out of that house and heading back home, with this weight taken off her shoulders.

Therefore, after a little time spent fidgeting on the couch, she politely asked Liz if she could say hi to Alex, and in a couple of minutes she was outside the boy's room while Liz left her there with a small smile.

Claire knocked on the half-open door, making her presence known.

Alex was half seated on the bed, covers tugged as highly as they could, and a magazine in his hands.

He looked up from his lap and she shyly waved her hand, not moving from the doorpost she was leaning on.

"Hi…"

He greeted her with another 'Hi'. His voice was weak, but a warm smile appeared on his face.

After everything had happened he was still pleased to see her… How could he not hate her? She had spent so much time trying to hate him that it was hard to understand his cheerfulness.

"I hear you've been a bad boy…" she tried to laugh off her nervousness and lighten the mood in the same time. Actually she had prepared that joke… She had to talk about what had happened, she really wanted to, but didn't know how… He wanted to or not? What did he think about that? She wasn't even sure he would like to see her yet…

"I had my reasons…"

Her eyes grew wide hearing his answer. Had she seen him smirking?

He couldn't really think that waiting for her everyday, even in the worst rainy day ever, hoping she would finally let him explain, worth pneumonia! He was probably joking, but what kind of a bad joke it was?

"You're so stupid sometimes…" she hissed half angrily and half relieved because he was fine and already joking. Looked like he couldn't help it after all…

"Yeah, I know…"

She walked slowly towards his bed to sit on a chair placed just beside him, but he quickly grabbed her wrist. She couldn't foresee he could be so quick, tucked with a million blankets and ill. But he was. And she didn't want to face him. Not that way. She could handle a small conversation about weather or drenching, but wasn't prepared for his next words…

"I can explain Claire…"

She shook her head. She had to stop this right now.

"Not now. You need rest. See ya." She quickly released her hand from his and put it on the bed, then walked out without looking back even once.

Claire never came back in his room for all his convalescence. She came back to see him, but only when he was wealthy enough to stay in the sitting room with the guests and only if she was sure they were not alone. When she was not so sure she waited for Stevie or Jack to go with her.

A few days later Jack and Claire were in the Killarney sitting room for tea. Jack was talking deeply with Harry about cattle and Liz was about to leave for a few minutes to make an important phone call (she hadn't lost the habit of making herself busy after all), but Alex stopped his mother before she left.

"Mum, I'm going out for a walk…"

Liz sent him a worried look. "You can't alone, darling…"

"Mum, I've known how to walk for a while now… Don't you worry! I'm not so weak anymore…"

"But… but…" she stammered, hoping for an alternative solution, and she finally found it "Claire could come with you… I'd be relieved…" Liz suggested.

Alex lifted his shoulders, not wanting to support too much his mother's words. From the last talk they had had he wasn't so sure that Claire would have liked the idea, but Claire nodded at Liz and followed Alex to the door.

"Air… finally!" Alex exclaimed as soon as he was out of the house.

She could see he was still rather weak, and had to sit soon on the outside couch. But he undeniably seemed a lot happier just feeling the wind over his face. She couldn't even imagine being forced to stay inside for two weeks… this would have most definitely turned her insane!

"Your Mum seemed quite worried…"

"You know how is she… it's because some days ago I almost slipped trying to come downstairs all by myself… Maybe I had a lack of food…" he said grinning and rubbing his hand on his stomach.

Claire had to laugh at his smirk, but in the same time had to swallow. Thinking about him so weak to almost slip along the stairs was still hard… Alex Ryan, who usually was always corky and so sure of himself…

"So… now instead you can take a walk…"

"Yup." He answered, clearly proud about it. "From last visit. Doc said in a couple of week I'd be as fine as new… Being trapped inside all day was driving me crazy, you can't imagine! Gosh, I even missed working!"

Claire looked down but Alex didn't miss the guilty expression on her face. He didn't want this… He was just joking… the last thing he wanted was having Claire back at his side because she felt guilty. And of course he didn't want her feeling bad either. Probably the year before, with someone else, he could have used the guilt-card, but not now, and most surely not with Claire.

"It was my fault anyway… I chose to escape, I knew it could rain, I should have brought some kind of shelter, but I didn't. It was stupid, I know…" He tried his most mocking tone, but noticed that his voice sounded more concerned that he meant it to be. If he hadn't known yet, he knew for sure now that he would have always loved Claire no matter what. Even if she didn't want him back as a boyfriend he would have always tried to be a mate. He cared too much about her not to know what was going on in her life.

"Yeah, of course it was, you idiot!" she laughed back. She was still a bit guilty, and probably would ever be, but by now she knew at least he didn't blame her, and started to feel that this whole situation they were living in was stupid compared to some major things, like their own lives.

Alex saw that she was starting to think, and considered best to try another joke before she could turn serious again on him. "I was sure Dad was going to punish me somehow, but he didn't… at least not yet… Probably he will do as soon as I can work again…"

'Maybe because almost killing yourself was enough of a punishment!' she thought, but kept this thought to herself. "Yeah, very likely…" she said instead.

After her visits at Killarney Claire kept thinking about what had happened and what her life had become lately. For the first time she was aware that her behaviour had had to be difficult to handle for everyone else. She had been foolish thinking that she was the only one affected by this whole story. She lived with other people who cared about her, but instead of talking with them she had just written them off, spending all her spare time feeling sorry for herself. And this wasn't like her at all.

She felt the need to talk about this with Stevie, the one that had had to handle her bad mood the most.

"I'm sorry Steves, I've been selfish pouring everything out on you this latest weeks… I feel silly… Even if I have to say that Alex have been sillier than me since he almost killed himself for nothing…" They both suppressed a laugh "Anyway, now it's time to stop it. From now on I'll be responsible for my manners, I accept what happened and I go on with my life."

"What about Alex?" Stevie asked, trying to hide her narrowed eyes. This was some change! She had trouble believing that Claire overnight had just changed her mind and wasn't going to spend her time being angry with her ex-boyfriend-who-had-hurted-her anymore…

"Alex is a neighbour, I can't ignore him or pretend he doesn't exist in front of everyone else… As I said, I accept what happened, but the past is the past. Now that it's over I can be more objective… I'm sure Alex didn't mean to be cruel… he was just his usual silly self, and I happened to be the object of one of his stupidities…"

Stevie was about to say there had to be more than that, but didn't want to push Claire too hard. She had already made a huge step as it was… Everything else could wait.


	27. Chapter 27

**This is the last chapter I've written so far, but the next one is pretty much ready. I guess there won't be more than 4 or 5 chapters left, but one never know…**

**Thanks Jill for beta reading.**

**Chapter 27 **

'_The past is the past'_, _'I'm sure Alex didn't mean to be cruel… he was just his usual silly self, and I happened to be the object of one of his stupidities…'__'I accept what happened and I go on with my life'_…

One thing was saying it; another one was actually doing it. Everytime Claire saw Alex she still felt an awkward unpleasant feeling that made her want to run away from him. His weak voice in his room, how pale he was… and yet so happy to see her and talk to her… She didn't know what could have possibly had this effect on her, but yet there was something.

But… he was his usual cheerful self again, and day by day it was harder and harder to remember why she was running away once more. And maybe she didn't want to remember. Pretend there was nothing to remember was way easier…

It took Alex months to have a decent conversation with her again, but his efforts finally succeeded, their friendship started to grow again, helped by some Stevie's hints and a bit of luck. 

Alex was alone at home; his parents were in town with Nick for a Doc's appointment, when the phone rang. It was Jack, saying that one of the horses had just run away and they needed as much help as possible. Alex greedily offered to take Killarney's Ute and in half an hour he was discussing with Jack over a map, deciding the best way of action. 

The runaway horse was one of Claire's favourite mares, the kind of horse Claire would have liked to start breeding with one day, and Alex and Jack were perfectly aware of that. 

Four teams were arranged in no time, to go searching in every possible direction, until one of Drover's hands, after hours of exploration, spotted a lonely mare not far from the National Park.

In a heartbeat Jack, Meg, Alex, Claire and a couple of hands were all gathered there.

Claire was the first to approach the animal. In her gentle particular way, she talked to her and stroked her hip until she was finally soothed. Just then, at the exact right time, Alex held her a rope to tie the rebel and lead her in the trailer arranged to take her back.

Just when she was safe in the trailer Claire realized how well they had worked, all together, especially with Alex. He was still part of this world after all, a part of her world, like he had started to be months ago, probably ever from his first dinner at Drovers…

Claire smiled at herself at the thought, and was about to mount on Jupiter when heard Alex calling her.

"Wait, Claire!" She looked questioningly at him, half worried he was about to tell her something about 'what had happened' again, but he smiled oddly at her. "Thoughtfully today, aren't we?"

"What?"

He looked down and she followed his gaze. 

Her feet? No, why would he look at her feet?

No, he wasn't looking at her feet; he was looking at Jupiter's leg and hoof. And she saw what he meant.

Jupiter had lost one of his shoes.

She usually was very careful with this kind of things, so he was right; she had to be deeply lost in thoughts not to notice…

"Thanks" she quickly nodded at Alex and called for Jack.

Nobody had tools to replace the shoe right there, so Jupiter had to come back as soon as possible and with as little trouble as possible. Luckily the trailer they had taken had two boxes, so Jupiter could occupy have the one still empty. 

The thing was, that Claire had no longer her horse, while the Drovers hands had their own and Jack and Meg were in the Ute to carry the trailer. So in the end Alex was the only one that could give her a lift. What surprised Claire the most however was that she really didn't mind. She didn't feel guilty or angry anymore. One thing was deciding she wanted to get over it, a completely different thing was noticing that she really was. That really those feeling were gone. 

She felt suddenly relieved. Like a tons had been lifted from her shoulders. 

Life could be uncomplicated again.

As soon as they were on their way back Alex congratulated her for her work with the horse. He seemed really excited and kept telling her how great she had been and how good she would have been realizing her dream of breeding and training horses.

Alex wasn't so bad himself in the training, especially considering he had very little time to practice with all the work his father assigned him for Killarney, so his compliments were even more appreciated. 

Before she knew it they were both engrossed in talking about their respective techniques and point of views. 

When Alex mentioned where his parents were at the moment Claire realized she hadn't had that much contact with Nick either during the last months. But what concerned her the most wasn't Nick's _wellness_, already knowing from Jack that he was healthy, but Alex' relationship with his brother. 

"How are things going with Nick?"

He didn't have to conjecture to know what she meant to ask him exactly. And he was willing to answer as well. She was the only one he could talk about his issues with his brother, except maybe Nick himself. So he couldn't help but smile a little answering her. "Good"

His answer didn't give that much room for further talk around the subject, but Claire knew that it didn't mean he didn't want to talk about it. Actually she knew him well enough to see he did want to. "You two seem pretty close now…"

Alex nodded in agreement, not talking his eyes away from the road. "Yup, we are I reckon." The smile didn't want to leave his face, and she could bet she had seen also a smirk in his eyes. "And I have to thank you for that."

"Me? Why me?" 

What could she possibly have to do with Nick and Alex considering that she had barely seen both of them in the last year?

"Because at first you changed my way of thinking about a lot of things, and then, when I didn't have you to talk to I just had Nick…"

She laughed heartedly. "So he was my replacement? Not very flattering for him…"

Alex got the joke and laughed with her. "No, I didn't mean that…" Then he got serious again, trying to find the right words to explain what he felt. "It's just… with you I could talk about everything, like I did with Nick before the accident. I thought things would have never been the same… but I was wrong. I had to try at least… So we started talking again I mean not just usual chat, but really share something… and things got better. He told me he don't blame me…"

There was almost pride in his voice. Pride for having a brother brave enough to take his own responsibilities over the accident and not taking it all over him, brave enough to forgive him for not preventing the accident from happening, even if he was the older brother. And Claire was proud of him for these feelings. 

"I knew he didn't blame you"

"But I didn't know that. I couldn't believe he could possibly not blame me. I still have trouble believing it: after all those years we talked about the accident! We really talked! And after that I felt like a tons of rocks was falling from my chest… You know what I mean…"

She nodded. She did know what it meant to see the iceberg of the family secrets finally melting away… She still remembered very well the first time they had talked about the rocks weighing over their chests. Looked like Alex was free from his heavier rock, but she still wasn't. Maybe after all he was braver than her… She still missed the courage to contact her sister after not seeing her for so many years…

"And your Dad?" Again, like in old times, the best way to avoid talking about _her_ family was asking questions about _his_.

"What?"

"You still think he blames you? Now that you know your brother never did…"

The relieved and smiling face of earlier turned into a troubled one that pretty much gave away the answer to her question. "It's different… I don't _think_ he blames me, I _know_ he does."

"I can't believe a father can blame his child for something that wasn't even his fault…"

Alex' face softened considerably at Claire's concerned words. "It's a good thing you can't. That's because your Dad could never do this to you…" 

There was a softness in his voice that she had never noticed, not even when they were together, and for a moment wondered what had caused it, but just for a second. She sighed, considering once more how lucky she was after all. Because she had the best Dad ever and also because of Alex. 

"I missed this…" she confessed in a whisper. 

She still couldn't believe he had succeeded. She had let him in again, like before or even more… But now she was sure it was the right thing to do. Maybe he wasn't so trustworthy as a boyfriend, but she still needed him as a mate. Wanted him as a mate. She knew when and how to help him as well as he could help her at anytime. 

Alex was lost in thoughts and needed a second to realize she had spoken. "What?"

"This… talking about this… with you… I missed it."

He couldn't believe his own hears. Had Claire just told him she missed their chats? And had just given him a real smile? That was a change! 

Things were definitely better after his health problems, but he still wasn't sure she would have ever been as close to him as she used to. And he sure as a hell wasn't going to miss this chance! 

"Yeah… I missed this too," he agreed, "you don't even know how much…" he ended in a whisper.

**This is the last pretty much 'uneventful' chapter. In the next one something very important will happen, I promise.**


	28. Chapter 28

Chapter 28 This is the last chapter I've finished so far, so for the others I think you'll need to wait a bit. During the last weeks I wasn't in the mood for writing, don't know why, but I had troubles writing anything. I hope I'm growing out of it because I really miss writing.

**Anyway, thanks Jill for beta reading and let's get back to the story.**

oOo oOo oOo oOo oOo oOo oOo oOo oOo oOo oOo oOo oOo oOo oOo oOo

Chapter 28

The morning of Claire's eighteenth birthday she came downstairs to find the kitchen empty. It was kind of odd. Usually her father was already up, reading the newspaper, and Meg was around somewhere.

Instead she instantly spotted a slim box over the kitchen table.

She took it in her hands and observed the nice sketches on the paper. Horses. The brightly coloured paper and the red bow suggested it to be a birthday present for her, but there was no sign of a card, no hint about who was the donor of the first present of the day.

"Meg?" she called out loud, hoping to figure this mystery out. When she poked her head out to the porch she noticed Alex standing there, looking directly at the kitchen door and wriggling nervously his right foot.

"Alex! What are you doing here?" and then, looking at the package still in her hands, she realised that probably there was a reason for his being there so early in the morning, and that reason had to have something to do with the present. "Is it yours?"

He just nodded, with a proud smile all over his face. "Can I?"

'Of course you can!' he thought, but didn't say out loud. Instead he just nodded, one more time.

He had worked hard for the whole year to put aside the money he needed for getting her this present, and really wanted to enjoy her face seeing what he had planned for her. There was still a chance she wouldn't like the present and, if this was the case, he'd be in serious trouble, but he sure hoped she'd appreciate it. She wouldn't be indifferent, that was for sure. Very pleased or mad as a hell maybe, but she would definitely not be indifferent. She was Claire McLeod after all, the most passionate and strong person he had ever met.

She knew it was stupid to ask if she could open the present, but she had a strange feeling of reverence looking at the little package in her hands. It was as if she knew it had to be very important. Perhaps it was for Alex' face right now, expectation and a bit of worry clearly visible in his eyes.

While she was slowly tearing the paper she didn't have the slightest idea of what it could be, it was something so slim it seemed just a bunch of paper. When she finally realized what the envelope contained she turned a bit pale.

They were tickets.

Tickets for two from Fisher to Melbourne and a hotel stay in Melbourne for three days and nights.

If she had looked up at him she would have read the worry multiplied for twenty. He fidgeted on his feet and started a sort of explanation before she could even bring herself to react in any way. He didn't want to see her disappointed neither for a small second (nor he waned to end up with his head ripped off).

"I thought it could be your chance to meet Tess… The hotel is in the same area as the address you found. I guessed you'd like to go with someone else, so everything is booked for two. You don't have to pick me, I know it could be… weird, you can go with Jack or Stevie or Meg or whoever you decide. Now I have to go…Happy birthday Claire. You're a grown up now…" He smiled again, gave her a quick peck on her cheek and left, leaving Claire still speechless, her heart pounding heavily in her chest.

Tickets… to meet Tess…

He was offering her on a silver platter the chance she hadn't dared to take by herself.

Everything was organized for her, she just had to go.

'Go'. A small, tiny word, just two letters, and yet it was the most important word she could think of right now. She could _go_. And meet Tess. After ten years.

She almost felt like fainting, but Claire McLeod didn't faint; she was strong, she could face this. She just had to decide who would be coming with her, just a simple question, wasn't it?

But after thinking about that simple question for two hours, hidden in the stables, she wasn't so sure it was so simple…

Stevie found her still there, sitting on the hay, with the tickets in her hands. For her seventeenth birthday Claire had pretty much freaked out, so this year Jack had decided for a small celebration, just the family, at dinner. Meg and Jack were guessing she was still asleep, having shut off her alarm clock, so nobody had sent a search party for her yet, but Stevie knew better than that. She couldn't be asleep, so there had to be something else.

"What do you have in your hands so important? You're staring at it!" Stevie asked her friend. Claire, by her side, wasn't at all surprised to see Stevie there. She knew she was going to find her sooner or later, and maybe it was okay. She had to talk about this with someone since she wasn't coming up with anything by herself.

"It's… it's Alex' present." she muttered "Tickets to meet Tess…"

Claire had still her eyes on the ground, so she missed Stevie's confused face. "Tess? Who's Tess?"

Looking up at her friend she realized that, despite their long chats and confidences, she had never mentioned Tess in front of Stevie. Looked like the time had come… "My sister"

"Do you have a sister?!" How was it possible? How could her best friend Claire have a sister she knew nothing about? Didn't she trust her? There had to be something that deeply hurt Claire in this story, otherwise she would have told her…

"Yup, I have, but I've had no contact with her in years. It's a long story… I'll tell you everything, but not now…"

Ok, she could deal with this. They definitely had to talk about this, but she could wait. She had borne her stubborn friend when she refused to mention her former best friend, she could bear a little waiting. Now her attention was focused on what had driven Claire to hide in the stables on her birthday.

"So, what's the problem?"

"The tickets are for two…"

The words left Claire's mouth almost inaudible. Stevie had to make an effort to process what she had said. Tickets. Two. Was this some kind of romantic trip? Had she missed anything? "You mean you and Alex?!"

"Nope. He said I can decide who I want with me… but… you know… it was him the one who gave me the tickets… and Dad never wanted to talk about Tess and Ruth, I don't know if he wants to… and Meg… I remember she never liked Ruth very much… and then there's you but…"

Claire knew she was not being very clear, but really hoped Stevie would understand. She needed her to understand.

"Claire" Stevie interrupted her friend. "I'm aware that this is very important for you, but the question is simple: you want Alex by your side in this?"

Claire swallowed and took a deep breath before answering. "He was the first person I talked to about Tess, he helped me asking Dad about her. He just knows when I think about her without saying a word and he's the only one that really knows how I feel about her. I know it's weird… but I think I do want him beside me when I see her for the first time after all these years…"

Stevie couldn't help but notice that her insecurity was kind of cute… She was usually so confident…

"So that's it. Alex will come with you. And it's not so weird. You two have a past, you shared so much of your lives… it's just fair to do this journey with him. Don't worry, you'll be fine, everything will be fine."

That afternoon Claire gathered all her guts and went to talk to Alex. Nick welcomed her and addressed her to his room.

"Alex…" she said knocking at his door "can I ask you something?"

"Hey, Claire! Sure you can. What?"

"Wanna come with me?" she blurted out. She couldn't wait any longer to ask or she would have started running.

"Where?"

She smiled. Apparently he had forgotten about the tickets or didn't think she could want him there… "Melbourne, you idiot!"

"Really?" Alex' eyes were wide and his face was showing surprise and disbelief, but also pleasure. Claire only noticed the surprise and tried to explain her reasons.

"It's just… you were here from the beginning and you know better than everyone else what Tess means to me, so…"

"Claire, Claire, you don't have to convince me, I'd gladly come with you." Actually he secretly hoped she could ask him… never dared to say it out loud, even in his thoughts, but he was more than sure that buying these tickets he wanted to be with her, he wanted to see her face when she would finally meet her little sister, to share her thoughts about how was she like…

"Okay then. You'll come with me. I'll have to ask Dad for the day off, but I don't think it's a problem… The tickets are for next week, so…" she paused for a second, not knowing how to end the sentence. He felt her edginess for the situation and rescued her. "I'll call you later to arrange everything…"

3


	29. Chapter 29

Chapter 29

**New chapter coming. It's short, I warn you, but this way I have more time to fix the next part without letting you wait too long. ****I think I have 5 chapters more or so til the end... wow! Finally!**

**  
****Thanks Jill for helping me.  
**

**Enjoy! **

Chapter 29

So far the trip had gone fairly well. The plane was on time, the baggage arrived without any injury and they reached the hotel slightly before lunchtime, just as planned.

As soon as they had dropped their bags Claire's stomach started grumbling loudly, making them both chuckle.

"How about having some food now and leave the unpacking for later?" Alex suggested, having pity of her poor stomach. And indeed he saw her lightening in response. He knew her too well… She had probably been too nervous to eat breakfast that morning, and was now famished. He was starving too, but he had just his metabolism to blame for that.

"That would be great! Let me just grab a couple of things and we can go"

She did so and just a minute later she was standing beside the door, ready to go. But Alex seemed to think otherwise, since he was still stubbornly sitting on the couch.

"Alex? Aren't you hungry? I'm starving!"

She incited him to stand up with both her hands, trying hard to pull him up, but only succeeding in making him giggle, at least for a second.

When she took notice of his persistent seriousness, which clearly had nothing to do with their lunch, she sat beside him and tried shaking his shoulder. "Alex, we're supposed to go to dinner…"

He looked up at her touch and took a deep breath. Claire's big moment was coming, and they didn't have to loose focus on the final goal. "I know but… Claire… I think we should… call Tess' mother…" he suggested "We have to be sure she'll be at home… If we eat now maybe it will be too late when we come back to visit this afternoon… and we only have a couple of days…"

Claire's face dropped immediately. "Yeah, you're right…" She was instantly frightened again. She had been scared of calling her sister for two years, and again, if it wasn't for Alex, she probably wouldn't have found the courage to call today either.

Honestly, part of her still hoped that nobody would be at home. How awful was that from her? Part of her hoped she wouldn't see her little sister after ten years just because she was scared!

"Do you want me to make the call?"

Alex knew her well enough to know that, maybe, it was too heavy a weight for her alone to carry, and he was willing to help in whatever she'd let him help with. He was there expressly for that purpose after all…

She sighed deeply and raised her head, symptoms she had some of her courage back. "No, _I_ have to make the call…" This was _her_ call, she had to make at least _this_ step, to prove herself she could make it.

Her voice was firm, and even Alex was surprised at how brave and ready she looked, but then, as soon as Claire had the receiver in her hands, she froze.

She was sure she could do this, she had spent most of the trip playing the scene in her head, but now it was a completely different matter. What was Ruth's voice like? She still remembered it? What if Tess answered instead? It was lunchtime, she was supposed to be at school… that's if she stayed for the afternoon… Did she? Every day or just a couple of times a week?

She didn't care about Tess' timetable at school, not now anyway, but her mind was overwhelmed and overloaded with questions. What could she say to Ruth Silverman, a woman she hadn't seen in ten years? 'Hello, I'm you're ex husband's daughter, do you remember me?'. She hadn't thought about that. No, she had, but nonetheless she wasn't prepared.

Alex saw the confused look in her eyes and took the receiver in his hand without a word. A few seconds later the room was in complete silence, they weren't even breathing, just waiting for a voice to be heard. Claire had her head as close to the receiver as she could, wanting to know as soon as possible, even if she wasn't ready to jump in yet.

"Hello… ehm… Mrs McL… uhm…" Alex stalled, realizing he didn't know how he was supposed to call the woman on the other side of the line. McLeod didn't seem appropriate anymore, considering the situation… probably nobody had ever called her like that in a decade, but he didn't know her maid name.

"Silverman" Claire helped him. Alex nodded and went on. "Mrs Silverman, I'm Alex Ryan. You don't know my name, but I am a friend of Claire…… yes, that Claire, Jack's daughter. We're here in Melbourne for the weekend and Claire would really like to meet Tess……" Claire couldn't make out the words Ruth was saying, no matter how close she was, so she was trying to read Alex' face instead, but it was pretty much useless. He was concentrated, that's all she could read. "Nope, he's not here… He doesn't know, it's just Claire and me" He paused for a few seconds, nodding every now and then, then continued "Yes, okay, I know where. We'll be there. Thank you" and hung up.

"So?" Claire asked, tense like a violin string.

Alex relaxed on his seat and smiled reassuringly before explaining what the outcome of the call had been. "Tess will be at home around 4 p.m. and she said we can go a bit earlier, so we'll be already there when she comes back from school."

It took Claire a few seconds to slowly start realizing that they had made it. It was really going to happen, it wasn't just a dream… "So I'm really going to meet her…" Her slim smile turned into a look of terror "What am I going to tell her? What if she doesn't like me?"

She probably hadn't even noticed she had stood up from the couch. "Claire, Claire, calm down and sit down here. I'm sure that she missed you as much as you missed her and she'll be more than glad to see you, don't worry. Anyway I'll be with you all the time. That's… that's if you want me there…"

She didn't say anything, but smiled thankfully at him. She was glad to be there with him. This was exactly what she wanted when she asked him to come. Someone to share this situation, someone that could be there for her, and without asking, because he knew as well as she did what she was being through.

When they finally went out for lunch the appetite was almost forgotten. Alex tried his best to divert her attention from what was fast coming, and was being quite successful. He was still the best guy when it came to having fun after all…

A small hour after returning from the café around the corner they were on their way again to Ruth and Tess' house. They were early, but walking slowly sounded better than stalling, didn't it?


	30. Chapter 30

Chapter 30

**You probably hate me right now, that's if you're still interested in the story... ****I can't believe it took me FOUR months to post this!!  
I can just repeat what I just wrote for "Someone to fight for" (which I'm posting too, btw), that I had exams to do that pretty much sucked my energy and all my creativity out and after that I had (and still have) problem getting back on track. And now with other exams to think about... annoying thing…  
Anyway, let's get back on topic. Finally Claire is meeting Tess...  
Enjoy  
And a big thanks to Cat for helping me.**

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

**Chapter 30**

For Ruth the look on Claire's face was easily recognizable. After all these years, that girl was still effortless to read… She was extremely nervous; who wouldn't have been in her shoes? But there was not much she could do to help Claire.

Tess had entered the house ten minutes beforehand, and the sisters had just gotten passed the first wave of happiness and shock.

Claire and Tess were seated on the couch. They looked to be getting along pretty well, considering the situation…

That boy, Alex, was looking at them with a happy smile. Ruth couldn't help but wonder how much of the story he was aware of, how much Claire had told him… Jack had tried over the years to keep some kind of contact with Tess, and now her daughter would know everything about the birthday and Christmas cards he had send. Claire probably knew. She had to tell her before Claire did. As a mother, she had just wanted to protect Tess from all of this; from all the hurt she had felt leaving everything she had held dear behind. Giving up her life and her husband, creating a new life on her own with only Tess; none of it had been easy; but maybe it had just been selfishness. Perhaps she had wanted Tess to be like her, and not like Claire and her father.

None of them would have ever really been hers; she had known that from the first time Tess had been on a horse. Leaving Drovers was the only way to keep something out of her relationship with Jack, something that would have been mainly hers. He had Claire and she had Tess. One girl each. It sounded fair enough for her, but maybe not for the girls themselves.

Yes, she had been selfish; she had chosen the easy way out.

Now she had a second chance to make it right; by letting Claire and Tess be sisters; and not lose her daughter in the process. She had to hold onto that thought.

"Do you want some tea?" Ruth asked the girls.

"Yes Mum, thanks" Tess answered with a smile, before Claire could reply anything.

Alex finally turned his attention away from the girls and offered Ruth his help with the tea. The woman nodded, inwardly smiling at his obvious attempt at leaving the two sisters alone.

Ten minutes later Alex was leaning on the doorpost, still watching the girls, while Ruth waited for the water to boil.

"She's still like her father, right?" Ruth asked absentmindedly.

Alex looked at her a bit confused, wondering what kind of question she was asking and what kind of answer she was expecting.

Ruth noticed his puzzlement and tried to explain her words. "Claire, I mean… When she was five she was already as proud and stubborn as Jack…"

Now it was Alex' turn to smile and nod. "Yeah, definitely"

"I loved her, you know… as much as I loved Jack, but I couldn't take her with me… I already knew that she couldn't leave Drovers… ever… just like her father…"

"Yeah, Drovers is their whole life… Besides Claire needs four legged animals around to be happy…" he laughed.

"So I gather she still loves horses…"

"Oh, she adores horses! And horses love her! She wants to be a horse trainer… She is already good at that! Hell, she has been great for as long as I've known her! And probably even before that… Sometimes I think Jack taught her to ride before she could walk…"

Ruth perfectly understood what he was talking about. After ten years, she could still remember the way the McLeods could bond with their animals, especially horses. It looked like some kind of magic… Something that could attract you like a magnet once you had the chance to see it. The same thing she had thought she couldn't live without, even after having been back in the city. It still made her heart ache. "There has to be something in them… something you can't do without once you've seen it up close."

Alex frowned. Did that mean she still loved Jack? And if she did, why she had left all those years ago?

Ruth noticed his expression, but she couldn't explain her own feelings, she couldn't clarify how empty she had felt or how damaged she still was. Certainly she wasn't going to try to discuss it with a teenager! Even if she had seen in his face the same expression she once had whenever she was looking at Jack McLeod. The boy was surely head over heels with her former step-daughter, and Ruth Silverman-McLeod knew very well what it was like to love a McLeod… it could be both Heaven and Hell at the same time.

A little while later Alex turned his attention back to the sitting room, making a mental note to rethink his conversation with Ruth at another time. Right now even his confused brain could understand he wasn't going to get anything else from her. She had closed herself in a sort of emotional shell after her last line, even going so far as turning her back to him and busying herself around the stoves.

Before he had time to think more about it, a loud cry coming from Tess startled him.

So far Claire was quite proud of herself. She had managed to keep the conversation going without any trouble. Not that it was so hard, considering that Tess hadn't lost the ability to wear everyone's ears out with talking, talking and more talking. She was listening more than she had the chance to tell, but she didn't mind. She was there with the purpose of getting to know Tess after all…

Nonetheless she too was shocked by Tess' sudden outburst, just in the middle of a tale about school.

"Claire, I almost forgot, I have a gift for you!"

"A gift?!" Claire's eyes widened and she nearly panicked. Was she supposed to bring a gift with her? Probably, but she hadn't thought about that… and besides, why did Tess had a gift for her? She was the host, not the guest… an unexpected guest even, in this case.

"Yup. A birthday gift. I know it was your eighteenth birthday last week. It's important for any girl!" she stated seriously, but her eyes also showed a hint of pride. Whether it was pride for her sister, pride for remembering her birthday after ten years; or something else she couldn't tell, Claire was very impressed.

"You remembered my birthday?"

"Of course! You're my big sis!" Tess squealed, as if Claire's birthday was the most important of all things scheduled in her agenda. She ran into another room and reappeared with a little box wrapped in coloured paper.

Claire was overwhelmed with joy and felt completely speechless. Her little sister had a gift for her! Alex had been right, she hadn't forgotten her…The box in her hands was the biggest proof of her affection she could have ever wished for.

"Claire, usually, when someone gives you a gift, you have to open it!" Alex hinted, after Claire had done nothing but stare at the box for over a minute.

Claire suddenly felt self-conscious.

"Yeah, yeah…"

She slowly opened the small case and saw a key-ring with a little stuffed bear hanging from it. The bear wore a little light-blue shirt with the name 'Claire' written on it.

"You probably like a horse better, but there were only bears or ducks… It's a little thing, nevertheless when I saw your name on it I had to buy it… Take it as a sort of charm, for your future as a grown up…"

Claire was speechless all over again. She wasn't good with words, never had been even, so she simply smiled and pulled her sister into a hug. Usually she didn't like hugs either, but now it felt like the only proper way to thank Tess. She did not know another way to show her how much she appreciated the gift.

Claire and Alex were invited to stay for dinner. Every minutes Tess and Claire spend together brought a renewed glow over their face.

Alex had been observing Claire without her noticing; he knew that she was happy, as happy as he had ever seen her. He couldn't be more contented for her either.

They had been back at the hotel for a couple of hours now, and still she couldn't stop talking about her baby sister. How chatty and smart she was, how cheerful she had been meeting her and so on. Usually she was a quiet girl, sure, she knew how to have fun with mates, but it was remarkable to see her open up like that.

When sleep finally overcame her, she had still a big sweet smile plastered on her face.

Alex wasn't just happy for her, he was very proud of her as well, though he would never tell her that. Alex had needed years to have the guts to talk to his brother about their accident, and at the beginning, it had been so weird he wasn't sure if he was going to make it. Their parents had built a strong wall between Nick and him.

But Claire had done her best. She had been herself, not who she guessed her sister would have liked her to be. Just Claire McLeod, the Claire McLeod he knew and liked so much. Maybe someone else wouldn't have noticed the difference between the real Claire and the Claire she offered to the world, but he most definitely did.

So far this trip had proved to be worthy of all the overtime he had to do to buy the tickets, and then some.


	31. Chapter 31

Chapter 31

**Hallo!  
Here I am again... late, as usual. The good thing is, there are three chapters left, I think. So I'll try to work on it and finish the story before Christmas.  
****Thanks to everyone that's still reading.**

Enjoy! ;)

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

**Chapter 3****1**

The schedule on Saturday was for Claire and Alex to join Tess for breakfast and go out for a tour all around the city.

Alex had been in Melbourne a few times, when Nick had to fly in a city hospital to have more surgeries, but for Claire everything was brand new. She still didn't like the city, of course, too much pollution and loud noises, no peace and no land, but she was enjoying greatly spending time with her little chatty sister.

They were just about to come back when Tess took hold of Claire's arm, effectively making her stop.

"Claire, as you're staying the whole weekend, you could sleep at home with us tonight, you know? We'd have more time to catch up…"

Claire's eyes got wide. The thought hadn't even crossed her mind. Staying over?? She didn't mind sleeping in the same house as her sister, but she wasn't sure she was ready to share the house with Tess _and_ Ruth. Besides she had so little time and she did want this meeting to last as long as possible. "But… I don't know… Ruth…"

"I asked Mum. I had the idea just after you left yesterday and she said it was okay for her if it was okay for you. You just have to say yes. Please…"

Tess did her best imitation of a pleading puppy face that, obviously, succeeded in melting Claire's heart. One thing was sure: Tess knew how to have her way with people. And wasn't one to give up easily. But that probably came from the McLeod's genes.

Tess then spotted the glance Claire diverted from her to Alex. She had an idea about what was going on in Claire's mind. "Mum said our house has not room enough for the both of you to sleep in, I'm sorry, but you could stay in my room… I really really liked it if you stayed, you know?"

Claire stole another glance at Alex, a longer one this time. She was supposed to come back to the hotel with him, he was here for her and she didn't want to leave him alone, she didn't want him to think she didn't appreciate his help or she didn't want him to be around, but on the other hand she wanted so badly to spend as much time as possible with her sister and it was late afternoon already…

Alex obviously could see she was worried. He wasn't completely sure what exactly worried her, but he was going to do his best to put her mind at rest anyway. "Don't worry, I have a room already paid for and I can take care of myself, I'm a big boy. Tess is right, you two have a lot to catch up on… I'm a bit tired anyway, so it's better if I come back at the hotel now, before you head back home…"

Claire didn't want him to leave just yet, she was still a bit scared by the idea of being alone with Ruth and Tess, but she couldn't speak for her hosts. That particular "home" was theirs, not hers, she was just a guest.

"You're invited later for dinner of course Alex," Tess offered, "Mum is expecting the both of you." From the smile on Claire's face Tess knew she had done the right thing.

"Yeah, thanks. So I can bring with me Claire's stuff… for the night… No need for her to come back to the hotel when I can be her bag carrier!"

And with a funny sort of bow he started to leave. "Hey, Alex!" Tess called "My place, in a couple of hours. By the way, tonight you two are invited _out_ for dinner, so make sure you bring something nice for Claire, okay?"

Alex saw the wink on Tess' face and had to laugh out loud. Tess sure was one of a kind.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

The doorbell rang just on time. Alex looked a bit like Santa Claus, carrying all Claire's things, explaining apologetically that he didn't know what exactly Claire needed and didn't want to be rummaging too much into her stuff, earning a thankful look from Claire. Not that she had all that stuff, just a bag and a backpack, but he had also something for him to change into, in case what he was wearing was too wrinkled after the walk from the hotel, and a pack he had placed next to the door before ringing the bell.

Claire had just started easing him with her things when he cleared his throat, like someone who doesn't know where to start, but have to say something huge. "Claire… ehm… I have something for you… Actually it's for Tess, but it's something you maybe want to give Tess…"

"What?" she asked confused. He was still leaning on the doorpost, door ajar. This was his only chance to explain his idea before Tess came out in the hallway, where she was making room for her sister's stuff.

"Yeah, do you remember when you told me you had made something for Tess…"

"What?!" About three seconds later, Claire's frown was replaced by a look of recognition. "Ahhhhhh!! But it was months ago!" Actually Claire had mentioned that thing more than a year before, when they were dating. She herself had almost forgot Alex knew…

"Anyway, when you were packing your stuff in the car I found it and I thought it could come in handy…" She didn't need to know that he went on purpose in the basement of Claire's home, looking for that very same item…

Alex turned and brought in from outside the door a large but slim box. Claire's grin widened, grabbing tightly on the box.

"Thanks Alex" she just said, and kissed him on the cheek. Then she run in Tess' room, leaving a slightly stunned Alex behind her.

"Tess, Tess, I have something for you… It's not that much either, but…" She was all excited, and Alex was so happy to see her like this… she seemed a little girl again, just happy, without a single worry in the world, all jumping and smiling. A mood quite unusual for her, usually so business-like, despite her young age.

Tess hurriedly tore the paper and saw a framed painting. "It's… it's me?" Claire nodded proudly. "And _you_ painted it? All by yourself?" Claire nodded again.

"She's a girl with a lot of skills…" Alex interjected, making Claire blush just a bit.

Claire had painted it after her sixteenth birthday, when she had just asked Jack what he knew about her… and she hoped the day she would finally meet her sister wouldn't be all that far. She had used an old picture of her and Tess when the both of them were still living at Drovers.

"Oh Claire… I love it!!" Tess cried out before wrapping her arms around Claire's neck and hugging her tightly. "I love it sooo much!! I'll hang it here in my room right now!"

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

For the first time since she could remember Claire was spending the evening just with her sister, almost like a pj party. After a whole day in Melbourne she missed a little not having Alex to share her thoughts about the city. Tess lived there and liked it, so she couldn't say whatever came to her mind to her, but hearing her chat mile a minute was making up for that. Except the ear-ache and headache she would have almost certainly had in the morning…

They talked about their lives, Tess' school and friends, Claire's job in the farm and her love for horses, until the older sister mentioned Alex about something…

"So… is Alex your boyfriend?" Tess asked. This was the question she had wanted to ask from the moment she had seen him beside her.

Claire shrugged. "No. Why do you ask?"

"Common, he's here with you!"

"And so? He's… a mate…"

Tess poked Claire in the shoulder. She was more than sure there was something else in this story, something Claire wasn't telling. "But he made all his way down here just because _you_ could meet me Claire!! This is not _just friendship_! There's a lot more between the two of you…"

Claire made a deep sigh. They had just met, but Tess was already being the nosy sister… She was not used to someone asking her such personal questions… Yes, there was Stevie, always hinting at her relationship with Alex, but it was different… she knew them both and knew everything about their story, and besides she wasn't so nosy… she just let her opinion over the topic slip here and there…

After another poke and a couple of dirty glances, Claire finally decided to give in, just so her nosy sister would stop asking (hopefully). She had already tried her best moves that would have made everyone else back off, but apparently they weren't working with Tess.

"Actually we've been together, but it was more than a year ago, and we broke up after a month. Happy now? It's no big deal. Old story."

"Okay, this is even more weird!" Tess exclaimed, wide eyed.

"Why?"

"Because you two _broke up_, but he's still at your side. And not just for a chat, he's really part of your life! I somehow guess it was you the one who broke up with him…"

Claire sent her a 'what does that matter' look. "Can we, please, leave the 'me and Alex' topic out for now? By the way there's nothing to discuss or tell, he's just a mate, full stop."

Tess was a bit hurt by Claire's hasty remark (basically she had told her to mind her own business in a not so polite way), but maybe there was something important there, something painful… maybe it wasn't because of her…

"Ok" murmured Tess, almost indistinctly.

Soon after they wished each other good night and tried to drift off to sleep.

Tess pretty soon put her mind at rest assuming that maybe Claire was tired and didn't mean to be so rude, but Claire stayed wide awake for a while. After talking with her little sister, she was reliving every moment of her journey with Alex, trying to understand why Tess was so sure there was something more than friendship between the two of them.

When she had fallen asleep the answer to her question was still lacking, so Claire decided to closely observe Alex' behaviour the next day, and so she did. That's when she realized he really was acting like he was her boyfriend, ever so protective, sitting beside her, just being there and never asking anything in return. And it felt so natural… This thought confused her even more. Was he like that all the time? And if he was, why hadn't she ever noticed? She was aware of the special bond existing between them, she couldn't deny it, but she supposed it was due to their history. Going through whatever they went through and rebuilt a friendship had only made them closer and their bond more precious. But nothing else. There couldn't be something more… they had been so young then… Ok, it was just a year ago, but at their age a single year could mean the world, could change everything…

Tess was right about one thing through, it had been her the one breaking up. Not when she left after hearing Michael mention the bet, but when she hadn't let him explain, not trusting him enough. She had spent months thinking about her situation with Alex, until she had come up with the conclusion that it was better not to think about it. They were friends again, but she wasn't ready for rethinking about their relationship or remembering the hurt she had felt. Not yet.

As usual, when Claire McLeod was confused she just guessed the worst and took everything on the wrong side. She couldn't place Alex' behaviour, so she got angry at him. On Sunday she barely spoke to him for most of the day.

Tess had noticed her manners, but didn't say anything until late in the afternoon, while Claire was packing her things and getting ready to leave with Alex.

"Claire, did you and Alex have a fight?"

Oh oh. If Tess had noticed that something was off, a lot of questioning was coming. "No, why?"

"I don't know… You were acting differently today…"

A simple 'no' wasn't convincing enough for her, there had to be something. She was right the day before, so Tess was sure she was right now as well. "I'm sure that he's sorry if he did something wrong…"

"But he didn't do anything wrong… Why do you suppose he did?" Tess just blinked, as if she couldn't understand the question she was asked. "Maybe it's me the one that did something wrong…"

"It's not possible!" Tess declared. She seemed so sure of what she was saying that Claire wondered if her little sister knew something she didn't. About her, about Alex, about life in general…

"Why?"

"Because you're my big sis, and my big sis can't do anything wrong!"

Claire smiled at her sister's naivety. She was cute giving her all this trust, when she probably didn't even deserve half of it.

"Claire, do you think you can forgive him and make up?"

"But I said he didn't do anything wrong…" Claire laughed. That was the McLeod side… stubborn as a hell! But Tess went on with her speech, careless of Claire's objections.

"Whatever he did, he loves you, so don't be mad at him…"

Now Claire couldn't hold back anymore the major eye-roll she had been trying to stifle for a while. "Tess, I told you he's not my boyfriend, he doesn't 'love' me…"

"I know what you said, but he doesn't need to be your boyfriend to love you. And he does love you. The way he looks at you… he talks about you… Maybe you're not 'in love' with each other, but he clearly loves you, and I think you love him too."

OOOOOOOOOOOO

A couple of hours later Claire was again in the hotel room. She and Alex had to be early at the airport, so the goodbyes were already been said and done in the evening.

Alex had noticed her edginess, but assumed it was just caused by the separation from her newly-found sister. Nonetheless he tried not to push her in any way.

Useless. The fight came anyway.

Almost out of nowhere.

"Alex, don't act as you were my boyfriend, you were not the last time I checked!!"

"I was just…" He didn't even remember what had caused her outburst. He was asking her if everything was packed or something, had probably asked if she needed help, and she had just snapped, out of the blue.

"You know what, I don't care! Just… stop it!"

Why was she so angry with him? He just wanted to make sure she was ok, he wanted to be beside her, but she was mad. What had he done wrong this time? Why she always assumed everything the wrong way? Obviously she just didn't want him around, it was the only explanation he could think of…

"I'm sorry if my presence is bothering you. I thought we were on the same line of thoughts, you know, but obviously I was wrong, so I'm sorry. Don't you worry, from now on I'll free you from my useless company. Just don't blame me anymore for what happened between us!"

"What?!"

"For all this time I felt guilty for the bet and everything, I thought it was all my fault if you didn't trust me anymore and we had to be friends again first, but now… now I see that you don't care if I'm here or not, you just asked me to come because you felt sorry for me!"

"Alex! That's not…"

"Whatever… You had pity of me, it was the candy bar for the little boy, my reward for giving you the tickets maybe… I really thought we were happy back then, and we could be happy again, together, but it seems that I was just fooling around and you don't feel anything for me, otherwise you wouldn't act this way. Again, sorry if I bothered you so far. I'll take a walk. You'll probably be asleep when I'm back, so see ya tomorrow. The alarm clock is set at 5:00, just so you know."

When his last word were still echoing in the air, he was already storming outside, leaving an astonished Claire standing in an empty hotel room.

Why was he acting this way? It meant he still had feelings for her? After everything she had done to keep him at distance? It couldn't be possible…

What she knew for sure was that there was hurt in Alex' voice, and beyond everything that had happened between them, hurting him was the last thing she wanted and he deserved. Yet this seemed to be the only thing she was able to do to him…


	32. Chapter 32

**I know, I know, it's been almost a year since I last posted. I'm very sorry, but my everyday life got the better of me, I guess. **

**I'm not so pleased with this chapter, I keep changing something everytime I read it, so I guess that posting is the only way to go on.**

**Chapter 3****2**

Alex and Claire barely spoke to each other during their flight home. Or the drive back from the airport. Alex simply dropped her off at Drovers, coldly wished her a good day and drove off.

Claire was still processing what had happened so, with the excuse of unpacking, she spent the rest of the day in her room. She put her nose out just to eat and to go to the stable because the horses were the only company she coulde handle right now.

Jack still didn't know what Claire was supposed to do while being away from home. She had just told him that the trip was Alex' gift for her birthday, but he didn't know what their plans for the weekend were, so his inquiring was mostly unspecific, much for Claire's relief. She could answer his questions about how she had liked the city without lying and without mentioning Tess either.

Claire had planned on telling him about Tess as soon as she got back, but now she definitely wasn't in the mood. Moreover, part of her still couldn't help but blame Jack for not being able to see or hear from Tess in ten years. No need to ruin the only part of the trip that had gone really well getting worked up with him all over again… Not for now anyway.

Just Stevie knew the real reason for their journey to Melbourne, and Claire knew she couldn't foul her friend for more than a second. Luckily (or unfortunately, that had yet to be decided) Stevie's sister had broken her leg, and her red-headed friend had rushed home to help her family out. That meant no questioning, but it also meant no-one to talk to about what was bothering her.

Stevie had known immediately that there was something off, the first time they had spoken on the phone. Claire obviously hadn't spilled anything, and Stevie knew better than to ask.

It was not like Claire didn't want to talk with Stevie, she just didn't know how to tell her. Or _what_ to tell her by the way. She herself still couldn't understand what had really happened between her and Alex. He was mad at her, of that she was sure. She was mad too, but she wasn't sure whom she was mad at or even why. What could she tell Stevie then?

A couple of days later one thing was settled: Claire knew she was not mad at Alex. Not really anyway. And the him-being-mad-at-her part wasn't all that of an issue either, she was conscious that Alex was going to forgive her, like he had already done countless times. Now she was thinking about Alex' parting words: 'Sorry if I'm bothering you'.

He was right, she had snapped like he was indeed bothering her, but it wasn't true, was it?

Everything considered, Alex had never really bothered her with his presence. Annoyed her maybe, often made her angry, but not bothered.

After the whole bet thing she had avoided him, and he had respected her decision to cut off for a while. Maybe it had been a mistake, that had let her anger take hold of her and effectively blind her. Or maybe she had been right. She wasn't sure anymore. But she didn't want to get back to those days. She was grown up enough to face the music now.

She was going to let Alex off the hook very soon, but first she had something to take care of, something to think about. How much Alex was 'bothering her' and how much she welcomed his attentions.

The day of Stevie's arrival came, and Claire finally had the chance to have the conversation she both dreaded and needed, also thanks to Jack's weekly poker night, that left the two girls all by themselves in the house .

After the two had summed-up the week spent apart Claire sighed heavily and closed her eyes. It was time to mention the topic they both wanted to discuss more than anything else. She still didn't like the idea of talking about Alex, but had run out of options and by herself she hadn't found any available solution to her problems.

"Stevie, do you think that Alex could still have feelings for me? Is it possible?"

Stevie looked at her like she was completely insane. "Are you kidding me?" Claire frowned, already a bit heated. This wasn't something she was willing to joke about!

"Of course he does!" Stevie almost yelled, "I've always told you he did!"

"But I thought you were making fun of me…"

Stevie couldn't help but roll her eyes. Those two were unbelievable! "Don't get me wrong now, but I think it was you the one keeping him at distance. He would have never left you alone otherwise. I don't know if this is the right moment to tell you this, but do you remember the first time we met?"

"Yeah, of course. It was at the Narrandow Rodeo"

"When Alex looked at our direction I thought he was happy to see me, because I had met him the day before, then I noticed that it was you the one he was looking at. What I mean is that, in all this time, I've never seen Alex looking at someone the way he looks at you. He may have done something wrong in the past, but that doesn't mean he doesn't care about you."

Claire looked down guiltily. If Stevie was right, then she had really screwed up. She also felt silly thinking that it all had started because of a bet. She used to bet with Alex and her other mates all the time, maybe it wasn't worth getting upset about it in the first place.

"Claire, what happened back in Melbourne? And you know better than playing dumb with me, I knew something was wrong as soon as I heard your voice on the phone."

"Everything went well at first, then I kind of got mad because of something Tess had said, and the last evening we were there I basically told him he didn't have to act like he was my boyfriend. He got angry and yelled at me that I had asked him to come with me because I felt sorry for him. He can't have feelings for me if he thinks I used him and I was just pitying him…"

She couldn't believe she got it all so wrong for all this time. Claire McLeod, the one that always wanted to be right and had to have the last word. She was trying to confute Stevie's words, but the more she thought, the more she had to agree with her friend's perspective.

"He was just angry with you, can't you see it? I'm sure you yelled at him something you didn't mean a lot of times! A few of them I was even there, I can witness…"

A heavy silence followed. Claire was still pondering Stevie's words, while Stevie couldn't wait to see what Claire planned on doing.

"Claire?"

"Yeah?"

"I'm sorry for snapping… but for all this time I watched the two of you, I talked to you and I talked to him, and you're so stubborn that it was impossible to let you listen sometimes. But I think you might be ready now, so, if you are up to it, you should really have this discussion with him… let him tell you whatever he's been dying to tell you in these past months…"

Claire sighed and thought about it for a second before agreeing. "Maybe you're right"

Stevie let out a relieved sigh. Finally!! "Were you even doubting it? Can I make you a last question, before going to sleep?" Claire nodded her agreement. "How makes you feel knowing that Alex still have feelings for you? Liking the idea?"

Her question sounded playful, but Claire knew she was expecting a serious answer. She deserved it, and so did Alex.

"I… I don't know… It complicates things even more I guess…"

Stevie sighed again and rolled her eyes. The story was not over yet… Not even close…

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Like Claire had guessed, Alex was not angry with her. What she didn't expect was for him to come to her and apologize.

"Look Claire, I'm sorry for yelling at you last week… I was angry and I overreacted, I didn't mean what I said… It's just…"

The least she could do was to reciprocicate... "I'm sorry too… I didn't even thank you for coming with me… I don't know why I got so angry"

"So… what are we gonna do now?"

The question hung in the air for a while before either of them could answer anything.

"So now we're good again I guess…" Alex tried to hide a smile, but Claire noticed. "Why are you smiling?"

"Because this feels a bit like a déjà vu... This is what, the forth time we have to start fresh again?"

Claire lowered her eyes. He was right. It was always him the one trying to rebuilt their friendship, while she had been too proud and stubborn to do the first move… So she promised to herself she would be more open in the future, and this would be the last time ever they were stuck in this standoff.


	33. Chapter 33

**Sorry again for the long wait. I'm not so happy with how this chapter turned out, but I wanted to post before I was too caught up with my studies... again...**

**I can officially say that, after this one, there are just two chapters left, so maybe this time I can really finish before Christmas... :pray: (I said that last year too... :roll: )**

**Chapter 33**

It had been a few days since Claire's latest clarification with Alex and everyone on Drovers and Killarney was engaged in a boar hunting. They were meeting at Drovers, that by now looked like a giant beehive, someone packing stuff for camping out (just in case), someone else fixing up food, a third group loading their rifles. In spite of all that chaos, Stevie happened to notice with no little relief that Claire looked more relaxed around Alex than she had in ages.

When the sun was setting they were far from home and far from finding the boar either. It was clear they had to camp for the night. Jack and Killarney's overseer were just starting to organize everything for the night when Stevie offered to do the roster and decide who had to guard the fire. She just hoped her idea would work out...

Obviously Stevie's plan consisted of making sure Claire and Alex had their shift together. That meant they'd be alone, with all the privacy they could wish for, in the middle of the night. The perfect opportunity.

And after a productive day spent together in peace.

When the two of them found out, they didn't seem to mind, or to feel too uncomfortable, and that made Stevie pretty hopeful, as much as proud of her idea.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

A few hours later Alex was seated on a trunk, in front of the fire. For the first time Claire noticed how sad he looked, like there was something missing inside him… He did look like a sad puppy, just as Stevie had pointed out.

She slowly made her way to the trunk and got a seat beside him, rubbing her hands and leaning them over the fire.

"Cold?"

"Neah…"

Silence filled the air. Claire was thinking at everything he had told her the other week… at the things Stevie kept saying… But there was only one thing she could do to clear her mind… ask Alex. Listen to his side of the story… She had been unfair judging him without letting him explain, but maybe she hadn't been ready back then… but now she was. Now she knew this was the only way to let this hurt they both felt go away.

"Alex… what happened two years ago?"

Alex looked down at his hands and sighed, mentally readying himself for the talk that was coming.

"What exactly do you want to know?"

"How about everything, from the beginning?"

A small smile appeared on Claire's face while he was looking at her, mostly for reassurance. He didn't want her to be mad at him (again) for trying to explain, but she was quiet, she was really waiting for his side of the story. Finally.

So he told her everything from the beginning, the conversation between his parents about her and Nick, how he got angry and decided to prove he could get to her, how he completely forgot about the bet and he wasn't brave enough to call it out. He also told her that he went to Michael's place the day before her sixteenth birthday, but his Mum said he wasn't there, so he left a card for him saying that the bet was stupid and he didn't care even if he told everyone he was a coward.

Claire had been silent, but at that moment she couldn't help but interrupt. Something didn't match…

"So why at the Gungellan Show he said you could have his horse?"

Alex shrugged his shoulder. "I have no idea…I guess he never received my card… I never had a chance to ask him after that day… We talked on the phone a few times after he went away, but he never brought that up and neither did I... I didn't see the point." Just then Alex looked up and straight in her eyes before adding the last phrase, trying to convey as much truthfulness as possible. "Claire, I promise, I truly believed this mess was over when I first kissed you, believe me…"

She usually trusted her instinct, and her instinct was telling her that Alex was telling the truth. Besides he had never been a good liar.

At sixteen she had let doubts overwhelm her. She wanted so much to believe him that she didn' trust herself to listen to his explaination. However... she didn't trust Alex for a reason. She probably would have listened, had his behaviour not been so confusing. She had felt betrayed when he was gone for months without a word, that was still very clear in her mind, and there were other things that had upset her as well...

"If the bet wasn't an issue, why did you leave that way after my birthday? What was I supposed to think? You kissed me and suddenly left, not saying a word!"

"I'm sorry. I was confused… I didn't know what I was feeling… It was all so new for me… But I missed you… I missed you every day of those eight months. I still do. I just didn't know what to do… I couldn't ask you to wait… wait for what?"

"For you" she softly said "You were my best friend, then all of a sudden you left and I didn't even hear a word from you. In eight months! And I had to find out you were coming back from an advert!!"

The proud Claire didn't want to admit how bad she had felt in those eight months, but the more mature Claire knew they needed to talk this throught and be completely honest if they wanted to leave everything behind.

"I know I was stupid, no need to remind me…" he joked "But I paid for my mistakes. I lost my best friend other than my girlfriend." And probably the only person that truly cared about him besides his brother...

"I guess we grew up since then"

She at least knew for sure she had learned a lot from all the misunderstandings with Alex, and she was pretty sure he had too.

"Yeah... everything we did seems so silly now..."

Maybe not the right thing to say... He didn't mean that Claire had been stupid... "Sorry, that came out wrong..."

"No, no, I know what you mean. It was childish of you to make the bet in the first place, but it was also childish of me to refuse to listen for all this time."

Alex nodded his approval. How many times he'd been wondering how different the last two years could have been if only... Too many 'what ifs' to be counted. But now, luckily, everything was out in the open, they were talking. This time they really were going in the right direction. This time he felt he was getting his Claire back for real. This talk made him feel so much lighter...

"Thanks for letting me explain. I feel a lot better now…"

His hopeful smile made her stomach twist. What was he hoping for? Did he want to start fresh? To take back from where they left off? A senso of panic threatened to overwhelm her. She couldn't do it. Expectations about work she could handle, she was a fast learner, but expectations about feelings were a completely different matter.

"Alex… Everything makes sense now, but still… it's not that simple…" She was almost stuttering, something Claire McLeod didn't usually do. But then she didn't know how to explain what she was feeling either. "We can't turn back time… I wish we could… but we can't..."

"What does it mean exactly? Where do we stand right now?"

He knew he couldn't expect her to suddenly trust him again and make everything right. Still a part of him couldn't help but be disappointed. He just wanted to leave everything behind and have his friend Claire back. Was that too much to ask?

"I don't know Alex. Right now I am the confused one… I hate how I sound, it's not like me, but I need time... to take in what you said, what you feel…"

"Okay, I don't mind. And as long as you know that I never meant to hurt you, I can deal with it. I just… never mind"

"You just what?"

"I'll always be there for you, whatever you decide."

Claire nodded faintly and extended her hand, placing it lightly on Alex', and he responded by squeezing it with his other hand. He was sure he could wait… he had already waited for over a year, and everything was looking better already.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

When Stevie woke up in the middle of the night she stretched her head out of her sleeping bag and threw a look at her two friends. They were talking, really talking, and they seemed pretty close…

Smiling she turned on her side and drifted off to sleep again.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

After their talk Alex and Claire fall silent, watching the fire burn in front of them and occasionally putting more wood in it. Before they could grow tired of watching the fire and thinking, their shift was over.

"Claire… it should be time to call Jack… you need sleep…" She looked exausted, and more than likely so did he. The emotional rollercoaster of the last hours had taken it's toll on them.

"What about you? You should call Stevie as well."

He shrugged. "Neah… I can stay here a little longer… I'm not sleepy anyway, and it's a beautiful night…"

"I'm not sleepy either. We could just wait here a little bit more…"

The night was warm enough and the stars were shining.

It was a peaceful night, the best if you had something to think through.


	34. Chapter 34

**I know, it's been a while, again. I'll admit I didn't work hard on writing lately, but my excuse is that I should be working hard to graduate (should being the key word).**

**Anyway, just another chapter left, and I hope I'll post it in a few days.**

**Enjoy**

**Chapter 34**

Alex had been relieved after explaining everything to Claire. He had told her he'd wait, and that's pretty much what he was doing. Waiting. Patiently. More or less.

Claire hadn't called and they hadn't even met the few days after the boar hunt.

No need to say he didn't know what to think anymore.

Before Melbourne at least they were seeing each other, either for work or just hanging out with Stevie, sometimes Nick and the other guys of the neighborhood. Now that he could wish for Claire to finally forgive him, she wasn't saying a word to him. How long this waiting was supposed to last? He had no idea.

He had never been the kind of guy that could waste time mulling over some girl's behavior. Not seriously anyway. And now almost everything he could think about was what Claire was thinking or how she felt.

A lot had changed since he was sixteen.

A lot had changed since falling in love with Claire McLeod.

Because he was sure of that now. No matter what the outcome was, Claire would always hold a special place in his heart. If the theory about soulmates was true, then Claire was definitely his.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

He was napping on the couch when the phone startled him. It was Sunday morning, so he wasn't working, his parents were out of town for a couple of days and Nick was somewhere hanging out with a few friends, so he had to get up and answer. It was probably something work related for his father or someone who wanted to gossip with his mother, but answering was the quickest way to come back to his napping.

With great surprise it was Stevie's voice the one he heard on the phone.

"Alex, I'm at the hospital in Fisher with Claire. Jack had a heart attack. Please, come as soon as you can"

Alex almost had a heart attack himself. Jack at the hospital? How bad it was? What if it was serious? How would Claire cope? Did she want him around or he'd just bother her? Too many questions, and he didn't have an answer to any of them.

Stevie felt the tension through the phone. He was unsure, he didn't know if Claire was willing to see him yet, but she knew better. "Listen, right now she's frightened, and she doesn't know what she wants, but she really needs you here, she needs all the support she can get. It's Jack we're talking about!"

The magic words were pronounced. If he could help in any way, he was going to be there. Jack meant everything to Claire, the only parent she had, the only relative she had grown up with. They were both stubborn as hell, but they loved each other deeply. Whatever happened to Jack, he had to be there for Claire.

There was always time to come back later if she didn't want him around after all…

"I'm on my way"

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Eight hours later everyone was still at the hospital, waiting for Jack to wake up. He had had a heart surgery, but apparently it was a minor one, and the doctors said that everything was fine now, Jack was strong and could hopefully live for thirty more years.

Claire had been pretty out of it until she was sure her father was alive, but she had the comfort of knowing that the people she loved were all there for her. She had been too worried to show it, but she was very grateful for that.

And now she also had the comfort of having her little sister with her.

At first Claire didn't want to call her, but Stevie had insisted she'd want to know and Alex had backed her up, so in the end they had won. Surprisingly enough Ruth had agreed to let her come by plane and Alex had picked her up at the airport with Harry's new chopper.

After seeing Tess, Claire had to admit it was really nice to have her there, even in these circumstances.

It did help the fact that by then Jack was out of danger...

Claire had just gone outside to grab something to eat with Tess, so Alex was alone in the room with Jack when he started to stir.

"Jack" Alex called softly. He was already getting up to call for Claire, but Jack stopped him by grabbing his arm.

"Alex… wha... what happened?"

Jack was slowly taking in where he was, and it was pretty clear he was in a hospital room, but still he couldn't remember why he was there in the first place. His throat was sore, but he had been pleased to see he could still talk.

"You had an heart attack, but everything's going to be fine, don't worry. Claire is just outside, she'll be here in a minute."

At the mention of his daughter he seemed to calm down considerably. Alex didn't want to upset him, but there was something Jack needed to know before the girls were back, and maybe it was better if the news came from him. If Jack's heart couldn't stand it, at least Claire wouldn't have herself to blame after all…

"Jack… there's something important you should know before I call Claire… Something about our 'trip' to Melbourne…"

"Oh my God! Is she pregnant?" He asked, eyes widened in panic.

Alex was startled. How could he think that Claire... how that had to do with the trip?

Then it dawned on him. Of course! Jack just knew that he was with Claire that weekend, so had assumed they were back together and, well...

Yet, thinking at how far he was from the truth made him chuckle.

"Of course not! Me and Claire… we haven't ever… we're not… together…" Anymore? Yet? He didn't know…

"But the two of you went away… alone... You brought the tickets..."

"Yes, but it's not what you think, it's complicated… It was my birthday present for her, but it wasn't a pleasure trip, I was there just for moral support… We went to Melbourne… so that Claire could meet Tess…"

Alex held his breath waiting for Jack's reaction. There was no way to know how he was gonna take the news.

After what felt like hours, but probably was just a couple of seconds, the older man's face showed signs of hopefulness.

"Tess?!? My Tessie? My daughter??"

Jack had no notion that Alex even knew about Tess' existence, but he figured Claire had told him at some point.

"Yes, your daughter. You told Claire where she could find her two years ago. I just picked the tickets. She was with me just because it could be weird to go with you… you know… after all Ruth didn't want you around Tess… but she couldn't deny Claire the right to see her own sister… and luckily she didn't."

"How did Claire take it? Why she didn't tell me?"

Some things were finally falling into place, but the questions were coming to Jack's mind too fast for him to even try and explain himself properly.

"Look, you can ask Claire yourself in a minute, she's just outside… with Tess…"

"Tess is here? In this hospital? I thought she hated me…"

By now Jack had tears in his eyes. He couldn't believe it was really happening, he was going to see his Tess in a few minutes, the daughter he thought he'd never see again...

"Nope, she definitely doesn't hate you. Tomorrow she has to go back, Ruth doesn't want her to miss more than one day of school, but right now she's here."

Jack visibly relaxed, much for Alex' relief. Now he couldn't wait to tell the girls that Jack was awake and to witness the family reunion. "Can I go and call them now?" He asked with a smile.

But again the older man stopped him before he could walk out of the door. "Hem… Alex… wait a second…"

"What? Are you okay? Do you need something? I know it's a lot to take in..."

"Do you love Claire, right?"

Alex immediately stilled. Where was this coming from? He knew the answer to that question, but saying it in front of her father was.... weird... at least. Anyway there was no need for beating around the bush. A man lying on a hospital bed deserved the truth, didn't he?

"Yes, yes I do."

"Then promise me you'll be beside her no matter how stubborn she is. Whatever happens to me"

"I told you Jack, you're going to be fine! You don't have to talk like that!"

"Just humor me, promise."

Alex rolled his eyes. He could understand Jack's worries, he had the tendency of being overprotective too whenever Claire was involved, but he didn't want him to think he could let down, no matter how many people Claire had by her side. "Yeah, I promise I'll do my best, but she needs you more than anyone else right now, so take care of yourself, okay?"

Jack showed a slight smile and nodded.

He had always liked Alex, from the first time Claire had invited him for dinner at Drovers. He was like him, and like Claire. He was loyal, and caring, and had potential. He knew that Claire had been hurt, and he was pretty sure Alex had been hurt just as much, but they were just kids, and he was confident all was going to end up fine. Mostly because they cared about each other. The way you care about family.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

As soon as he was out of the room, Alex noticed Claire entering the ward. He waved at her to come closer with a big smile on his face.

When he told her that Jack was awake her eyes widened, she moved closer and hugged him so tightly that he could barely breath (not that he minded, of course).

"He's awake, he'll be fine" he whispered soothingly in her hair.

The doctors had been clear about that, he was going to be fine, but a little part of Claire was still worried. Just now that he was awake she could let go of all the tension in her body.

And now that she had proof of Jack's well-being she had a lot to sort out in her head.

With Jack peacefully resting beside her and her sister on her line of sight she started thinking about Tess, Ruth, her mother and all the people she had loved in her young life and still loved, and she couldn't help but add Alex to them, and he had a place at the very top of the list.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

The next day Alex was still at the hospital with the McLeod sisters, while Meg and Stevie were back to Droves. Actually he had left Claire and Tess happily chatting with their father, and the mere though was making him smile. Now that the atmosphere was lighter Alex could take advantage of it and make a trip to the vending machines.

While contemplating what to buy he heard a voice he knew very well and turned around.

"I'm Harry Ryan, I wanna know what happened to Jack McLeod" thundered Harry at the reception desk.

"Dad…" Alex called, nodding him to come to the waiting room. "How's Jack? What happened?" The older Ryan asked before they could leave the counter.

"He had a heart attack, but he'll be fine. Luckily Claire saw him fall and they came here as soon as they could."

It took Harry less than two seconds to take in the news and make his own plans. "So, now that everything's okay you can come home… You already lost two days of work! We can visit Jack and then take our leave..."

Since Harry and Liz were out of town Alex had decided to stay in Fisher, while Nick covered him with their parents. Nobody knew as much as Nick how important it was for Alex to help out for Claire, and he didn't mind having the house all by himself for a couple of days either. But Harry was back now, ordering around as usual.

"No Dad" Harry opened his mouth to say something, a bit startled by his son's ultimate statement, but Alex interrupted him before he could talk further. "I'll stay as long as Claire needs me here. I'm not coming back unless she comes home too, and I'm sure she won't without Jack."

Harry roared a few more threats, but he was too surprised to see his son fighting him back to form a coherent plan. He had seen Alex complain about his work before, but this time it was different. This time Alex was looking into his eyes and telling him that his decision was made, and his father's opinion didn't matter, that his father's orders didn't matter. That was something quite unsettling for him, as used as he was to give orders.

When Harry eventually left, Alex knew this wasn't over, and he had a reprimand waiting for him at home, but he didn't care. He knew he was right, and had no intention of backing off.

Once more Claire had helped him fighting his demons. Never before he had been able to stand his ground with Harry Ryan. Never before he had told NO loud and clear. Never before he had known what was right and decided to fight for it.

He fell on a chair, emotionally exhausted. He didn't regret what was done, but how much was it gonna cost him?

Unbeknownst to him, Claire was leaning on the door of the bathroom, a few feet away from him, and had heard every word of his discussion with Harry. She had seen Alex fighting with his father, but this was different. She knew how much Alex still needed Harry's approval, yet this time he had chosen to stick around and fight him. For her.

Her heart was screaming to run in his arms and never let him go, but she knew it was not the right place or time. She had to wait for the right moment, a moment in which she hoped she'd be able to find the right words.


	35. Chapter 35

**I can't believe it myself, but finally it's done! It's the last chapter! Thanks to everyone that still reads it, even if I've had almost zero time to update lately.**

**I hope you'll be satisfied by the ending.**

**Chapter 35**

Finally it was time to take Jack home. Only a few discharge papers were missing. Tess had had to come back to school, but not before reassuring her family that she was going to stay in touch and visit Drovers as frequently as possible.

Seeing his younger daughter for the first time in years had shocked Jack, and Claire had been a bit worried for his health, but she soon learned that good news were way easier to handle, even for a wounded heart. Alex had been the only one to see Jack's first wave of surprise, while the others had seen just happiness in him. Whenever his daughters were around he was always smiling like a fool. Not only he was alive, but he had also both of his daughters around! Something he hadn't experienced in a decade!

Alex on his part didn't have a lot of reasons to be happy. He was happy for Jack and for Claire of course, but his family was a little more problematic. He was still at the hospital, he had always stayed by Claire's side, and because of that his father wasn't exactly happy with him. It could have been bearable, if it was just him, but when his father was unhappy he barked orders and was pretty much insufferable to be around. So Alex was pretty sure his bad mood had infected the whole property, and maybe that was why his mother hadn't called him. His brother Nick had tried, but every time Harry interrupted with something else to do.

Harry Ryan himself had visited Jack a couple of times and called Alex at least once a day, trying to whether convince or bribe or blackmail him into coming back home, but without any success, so he was still disappointed with his older son.

Actually 'disappointed' was not the best word, he was more upset and angry. He couldn't think of anything more important than Killarney, and he didn't understand how his son could think otherwise.

Just to make a point, he had taken back to Killarney the Ute Alex drove, and had made pretty clear that he nor the hands had time to pick him up, having his chores to handle as well as the usual stuff.

Claire had noticed more than she let on. She knew that, by staying, Alex was challenging Harry's power over him, and he was doing all of that because of her. She had been Alex' confident long enough to know what it could mean for him to challenge the mighty Harry Ryan, and was all the more grateful for his presence. Knowing his pride she knew he wasn't gonna ask, but he probably needed a way to get home, so she spontaneously offered.

"Alex, do you need a lift? I still have my car in the parking lot."

"I guess I do." He said sighing and lifting his shoulder. "Actually if you don't mind I could drive, so you can keep an eye on Jack…"

Claire immediately agreed without protesting. It was actually a good idea to keep a close eye on Jack. Car rides could be tiresome…

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Alex had been silent almost all the way to Drovers, just listening to Jack's complaints about the exercises he needed to do and the new life style his doctor had forced him to. Jack and Claire were so similar… Alex was sure she'd act the exact same way in his place, he could almost picture her in his mind…

Every now and then Claire glanced at him in the rear-view mirror. She was thankful he was still at her side. She was still waiting for the chance to talk to him, and the hospital didn't seem the best place. Maybe after dropping Jack off…

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

When Alex stopped the car exactly in front of the door and helped Jack out with Claire, the older man tried to protest, stating that he was fine, or he wouldn't have been released from the hospital. This ranting sent the two young people into fits of laughter, but they stuck to the doctor's orders and put Jack straight to bed, where Meg could feed him properly, after days of awful hospital meals.

Leaving Alex with Jack to keep him company, Claire joined Meg in the kitchen, gave her a paper with Jack's diet and reminded her for the umpteenth time everything the doctors had ordered.

She trusted Meg, and she knew the woman considered Jack and herself like her own family, but after the emergency ride to the hospital she felt the need to be a little overprotective. Since they had arrived at the hospital she had been beside Jack, and it was difficult to leave him in someone else's care. For a moment Claire even wondered if that was how a mother might feel the first time she has to leave her child after giving birth.

"Meg, can you take care of Dad for a while?" she asked then "He should be taking a nap anyway. I'm driving Alex home…"

"Sure, no problem"

Meg was almost grinning, and Claire wondered if the reason was Jack being at home or what she was going to do. It wouldn't surprise Claire if Meg knew already, she had a sixth sense for this sort of things. Not that she really cared if she had already smelled something or not, the others were going to know soon enough anyway.

___

At the bottom of the stairs Claire saw Alex coming down.

"Claire, I can ring Killarney for a lift now, I bothered you long enough. I think Jack is tired of having me around…" he joked

"Speaking of the devil… I noticed you two are getting along pretty well these days…"

It was definitely true. Claire knew that Jack had liked Alex from the beginning, but she didn't expect her father to accept help so easily by someone not related to him; they were a lot alike on that account, wanting to do everything by themselves. Nonetheless, at the hospital she could see Jack really counted on Alex and treated him like a son.

"Neah, he's not my type…" he replied.

Claire finally burst into a light-hearted laugh, and this caused Alex' heart to melt. He loved to see her happy and feisty and just... alive... this was the real Claire McLeod, the girl he loved!

When she stopped laughing she grabbed his hand and dragged him outside. "Okay, let's go. I'll drive you home"

He followed her without a word.

This time she was driving and he was occasionally glancing at her. Actually, more like all the time… Claire felt his stare on her and she let it warm her. She had spent so much time trying to ignore Alex or being angry with him that now, just being in the same car, relaxed, and knowing that his focus was on her felt wonderful.

She knew he was confused by her behavior, but she didn't feel like discussing anything personal at Drovers, as crowded as it was at the moment, nor in the car while driving.

"What are you doing Claire? Killarney is the other way, you just took the crossroad for Wilgul!"

He was so busy staring at her that he haven't noticed a car coming in their direction.

"Haven't you seen your parents' car? They are heading to Drovers to greet Dad…"

"So what?"

Claire rolled her eyes full force. 'Men… I have to explain everything!' she whined in her head. "Alex, if they meet us here you'll have to drive with them, but I need to talk to you, and I don't want to do it in front of them…"

"Oh. Right."

As soon as the path was clear she was back on the way to Killarney.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

When they arrived at their destination they had yet to interrupt the silence. Alex was impatient to know what Claire had to tell him. He hoped it was something good, but couldn't be sure. He had learned the hard way how unpredictable Claire could be. At least for him.

They got off the car and started walking towards the house. "So... what did you want to tell me?" he casually asked. Or at least trying to sound casual.

Claire stopped walking and put a hand on his arm to stop him as well. Just when they locked eyes she answered. "Thanks Alex, for everything…"

There was so much intensity in her eyes that he wasn't sure how much longer he could handle it. "You don't need to thank me… I did what I could. I can't help it…" He said, trying to lighten the mood. She was the one that had to say something and yet he was nervous. At the hospital she had been more kind and soft with him, and if he wasn't so scared to hope he could have said there was definitely something in her eyes telling him she still did care a lot about him.

"I don't know what I would have done at the hospital if you weren't there with me… I know that there are lots of people caring about me and Dad, but it was not the same… For a few hours I thought I was going to lose Dad, and still you were by my side and that made me feel better. You were, are and always will be the one that can always make me feel better. That's my point. What I'm trying to tell you is that now I know that I will never be completely over you, but I don't have to be, because you're always here for me and I love you."

Had he heard her right or his ears were mocking him? Maybe her gorgeous eyes had led him into hearing what his brain wanted to hear… Even if that was the case, his heart definitely agreed with his ears, since it was beating like crazy. "What?!?" He almost spat out.

She smiled. A sweet smile that showed she understood his confusion and was willing to wait for him to catch up with her. "I said I love you"

"You've never said it…"

Was it a stupid thing to say? Alex didn't know, but at the moment he didn't care. He was still trying to understand if this meant he was finally forgiven. A few weeks, or even months, after the whole bet debacle it would have been easy to believe that Claire had forgiven him, he was so sure she would, in the end. But it had taken months just to start talking again like normal people, and just when he thought they were almost okay, in Melbourne, she had pushed him away. Again. So it was no wonder he was still skeptical.

"I know. I took my time to figure that out myself… even if everyone else seemed to know better than me…"

Claire had a lot of things to tell him, for example how sorry she was for being so stubborn and unfair, but somehow she felt it was not the time. Right now she was more interested in his reaction, for which she didn't have to wait more than a second or two.

"I love you too" He cupped her face with his hands and leaned in to kiss her. "You don't even know how much I love you…"

They kissed softly and slowly, savoring every second, still wondering if it was really happening. Again. After all that time. And now it felt even more right. And real.

Alex was still cursing himself for all the time they had wasted because of that stupid bet. "I'm sorry Claire… for everything…" He murmured when they broke the kiss. "No more bets, I promise!" He had had months to think about everything that had gone wrong, and he had a pretty long list of 'what ifs', but in his mind the bet held a key role.

She smiled warmly and brought her mouth close to his ear. "You can still bet… as long as it's just with me…" she suggested playfully, wrapping her arms around his neck.

"Promise you'll never leave me again"

At that moment, maybe for the first time, Claire saw Alex for what he really was, past, present and future. Had a flash of what he had been, what he was and what he could be. And she was there with him. All the time. From the moment they became friends to as far as she could foresee in the future, she was there with him. They were going to be linked as long as they lived. He was her family, as much as her father and Tess, and she was his. It was a good feeling.

Yes, they were young and everything could happen, but whatever the future might bring, they'd be there for each other, they'd still be family to each other. She wasn't going to give up on him. Ever.

"You bet!"

There she was again, in Alex' arms, more than a year later… and this time she knew for sure that it was where she had to be, not to mention where she wanted to be.

It had taken more than two years, a friendship blossoming, his father making him go away for months, a lot of misunderstandings, a great help with each other's family problems. They both had made mistakes, but finally it was clear to both of them that they were made for each other, and nothing could change that.

THE END

4


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